These are the criteria I'll be using to determine whether an episode of Doctor Who passes the Bechdel Test or not:

·       The conversation needs to be more than two lines long. Which I know sounds silly - it means that a conversation that went "Move!" "Okay" wouldn't pass, but a conversation that went "Move!" "No" "Fine" would - but I guess the cutoff point has to come somewhere.

·       Both women either have to be named (whether in the episode or the credits: female characters only mentioned in the credits are highlighted in orange) or have a very good reason for not being named. So, for example, The Hostess from Midnight would count, but the German woman from Journey's End wouldn't.

·       This is a time-travel show, so after some consideration, I decided that a woman speaking to her past or future self (or to a clone, as in a couple of cases) is counted as a pass.

·       This is also a science-fiction show, but I decided that female-voiced robots and holograms don't count. Sorry! Malevolent Entities that present as female (ie. The Wire), however, do. And malevolent entities that present as male count as males.

Your input on this is VERY much appreciated. If you think that any one of these conversation shouldn’t pass, based on my own criteria, let me know. All the raw transcripts come from this site (edited a little to include stage directions and the like.)

Lots of thanks to mewiet @ tumblr for helping with this!



Series One
Series Two
Series Three
Series Four
Series Five
Series Six
Series Seven
Day of the Doctor
Series Eight
Series Nine
Series Ten








Written by Russell T Davies

JACKIE: It's Debbie on the end. She knows a man on the Mirror. Five hundred quid for an interview.
ROSE: Oh that's brilliant! Give it here.
(Rose takes the phone from Jackie and ends the call.)
JACKIE: Well, you've got to find some way of making money. Your job's kaput and I'm not bailing you out.
(The telephone rings again. Jackie answers it.)
JACKIE: Bev! She's alive. I've told her, sue for compensation. She was within seconds of death.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler, Jackie's friends on the phone
Talking about: Rose getting compensation for her 'near-death experience' (which, to be fair to Jackie, it sort of was.)

JACKIE: There's Finch's. You could try them. They've always got jobs.
ROSE: Oh, great. The butchers.
JACKIE: Well, it might do you good. That shop was giving you airs and graces. And I'm not joking about compensation. You've had genuine shock and trauma. Arianna got two thousand quid off the council just because the old man behind the desk said she looked Greek! I know she is Greek, but that's not the point. It was a valid claim.
(Something rattles at the door.)
ROSE: Mum, you're such a liar. I told you to nail that cat flap down. We're going to get strays.
JACKIE: I did it weeks back!

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose's job hunt, her 'airs and graces', and compensation.

JACKIE: Oh, there you are. I was just going to phone. You can get compensation. I said so. I've got this document thing off the police. Don't thank me.
ROSE: Where are you, mum?
JACKIE: I'm in town.
ROSE: No, go home! Just go home right now!
JACKIE: Darling, you're breaking up. Listen, I'm just going to do a bit of late night shopping. I'll see you later. Ta-ra!
ROSE: Mum! Mum!

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose tries to warn her mother to go home; Jackie is more interested in shopping and Rose's compensation.


Written by Russell T Davies

ROSE: Sorry. Am I allowed to be in here?
RAFFALO: You have to give us permission to talk.
ROSE: Er, you have permission.
RAFFALO: Thank you. And, no, you're not in the way. Guests are allowed anywhere.
ROSE: Okay.
(Raffalo goes to a wall panel and unlocks it.)
ROSE: What's your name?
RAFFALO: Raffalo.
ROSE: Raffalo?
RAFFALO: Yes, miss. I won't be long, I've just got to carry out some maintenance. There's a tiny little glitch in the Face of Boe's suite. There must be something blocking the system. He's not getting any hot water.
ROSE: So, you're a plumber?
RAFFALO: That's right, miss.
ROSE: They still have plumbers?
RAFFALO: I hope so, else I'm out of a job.
ROSE: Where are you from?
RAFFALO: Crespallion.
ROSE: That's a planet, is it?
RAFFALO: No. Crespallion's part of the Jaggit Brocade, affiliated to the Scarlet Junction, Convex fifty six. And where are you from, miss? If you don't mind me asking.
ROSE: No, not at all.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Raffalo
Talking about: Rose is attempting to get to know the place she's in, by talking to the locals. Raffalo the plumber just seems happy to have someone to talk to.
Notes: Rose then goes on to talk about the Doctor, however, the first part of this conversation doesn't mention him. This is just Rose being friendly and nice to somebody.


JACKIE: Hello?
ROSE: Mum?
JACKIE: Oh, what is it?
(Jackie is emptying the washing machine.)
JACKIE: What's wrong? What have I done now? Oh, this red top's falling to bits. You should get your money back. Go on. There must be something, you never phone in the middle of the day. What's so funny?
ROSE: Nothing. You all right, though?
JACKIE: Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?
ROSE: What day is it?
JACKIE: Wednesday, all day. You got a hangover? Oh, I tell you what. Put a quid in that Lottery syndicate. I'll pay you back later.
ROSE: Yeah, er, I was just calling 'cos I might be late home.
JACKIE: Is there something wrong?
ROSE: No. I'm fine. Top of the world.
(Jackie rings off.)

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler
Talking about: Rose, having called her mother from the end of the world, makes up an excuse to talk to her.


CASSANDRA: Soon, the sun will blossom into a red giant, and my home will die. That's where I used to live, when I was a little boy, down there. Mummy and Daddy had a little house built into the side of the Los Angeles Crevice. I'd have such fun.
ROSE: What happened to everyone else? The human race, where did it go?
CASSANDRA: They say mankind has touched every star in the sky.
ROSE: So, you're not the last human.
CASSANDRA: I am the last pure human. The others mingled. Oh, they call themselves New humans and Proto-humans and Digi-humans, even Humanish, but you know what I call them? Mongrels.
ROSE: Right. And you stayed behind.
CASSANDRA: I kept myself pure.
ROSE: How many operations have you had?
CASSANDRA: Seven hundred and eight. Next week, it's seven hundred and nine. I'm having my blood bleached. Is that why you wanted a word? You could be flatter, Rose. You've got a little bit of a chin poking out.
ROSE: I'd rather die.
CASSANDRA: Honestly, it doesn't hurt.
ROSE: No, I mean it. I would rather die. It's better to die than live like you, a bitchy trampoline.
CASSANDRA: Oh, well. What do you know?
ROSE: I was born on that planet, and so was my mum, and so was my dad, and that makes me officially the last human being in this room, 'cos you're not human. You've had it all nipped and tucked and flattened till there's nothing left. Anything human got chucked in the bin. You're just skin, Cassandra. Lipstick and skin. Nice talking.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Cassandra
Talking about: Cassandra demonstrates her prejudices. Rose is not impressed at all.


Written by Mark Gatiss

ROSE: What're you doing?!
GWYNETH: Oh, it's a tragedy, miss. Don't worry yourself. Me and the master will deal with it. The fact is, this poor lady's been taken with the brain fever and we have to get her to the infirmary.
ROSE: She's cold. She's dead! Oh, my God, what'd you do to her?

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Gwyneth
Talking about: The poor zombie lady.


GWYNETH: Please, miss, you shouldn't be helping. It's not right.
ROSE: Don't be daft. Sneed works you to death. How much do you get paid?
GWYNETH: Eight pound a year, miss.
ROSE: How much?
GWYNETH: I know. I would've been happy with six.
ROSE: So, did you go to school or what?
GWYNETH: Of course I did. What do you think I am, an urchin? I went every Sunday, nice and proper.
ROSE: What, once a week?
GWYNETH: We did sums and everything. To be honest, I hated every second.
ROSE: Me too.
GWYNETH: Don't tell anyone, but one week, I didn't go and ran on the heath all on my own.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Gwyneth
Talking about: Rose probes Gwyneth about her life and working conditions. They then talk about boys, Sneed, the Doctor and Rose's father - but this bit doesn't mention any men.


GWYNETH: Mister Sneed says I think too much. I'm all alone down here. I bet you've got dozens of servants, haven't you, miss?
ROSE: No, no servants where I'm from.
GWYNETH: And you've come such a long way.
ROSE: What makes you think so?
GWYNETH: You're from London. I've seen London in drawings, but never like that. All those people rushing about half naked, for shame. And the noise, and the metal boxes racing past, and the birds in the sky, no, they're metal as well. Metal birds with people in them. People are flying. And you, you've flown so far. Further than anyone. The things you've seen. The darkness. The big bad wolf!... I'm sorry. I'm sorry, miss.
ROSE: It's all right.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Gwyneth
Talking about: After some discussion of men (both specific men and in general) Gwyneth reads Rose's mind and sees her past and future.


ROSE: I don't care. They're not using her.
GWYNETH: Don't I get a say, miss?
ROSE: Look, you don't understand what's going on.
GWYNETH: You would say that, miss, because that's very clear inside your head, that you think I'm stupid.
ROSE: That's not fair.
GWYNETH: It's true, though. Things might be very different where you're from, but here and now, I know my own mind, and the angels need me.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Gwyneth
Talking about: Rose is trying to protect Gwyneth. Gwyneth insists on being allowed to make her own choice.


Written by Russell T Davies

JACKIE: The hours I've sat here, days and weeks and months, all on my own. I thought you were dead, and where were you? Travelling. What the hell does that mean, travelling? That's no sort of answer. You ask her. She won't tell me. That's all she says. Travelling.
ROSE: That's what I was doing.
JACKIE: When your passport's still in the drawer? It's just one lie after another.
ROSE: I meant to phone. I really did. I just I forgot.
JACKIE: What, for a year? You forgot for a year? And I am left sitting here. I just don't believe you. Why won't you tell me where you've been?

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Jackie is furious at Rose for her disappearance.
Notes: Shortly, the policeman and the Doctor involve themselves in this conversation, but this bit is purely between mother and daughter.


JACKIE: Did you think about me at all?
ROSE: I did. All the time, but-
JACKIE: One phone call. Just to know that you were alive.
ROSE: I'm sorry. I really am.
JACKIE: Do you know, what terrifies me is that you still can't say. What happened to you, Rose? What can be so bad that you can't tell me, sweetheart? Where were you?

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose apologises to her mother for what happened.


Written by Russell T Davies

ROSE: Hasn't it got, like, defence codes and things? Couldn't we just launch a nuclear bomb at them?
HARRIET: You're a very violent young woman.
ROSE: I'm serious. We could.
HARRIET: Well, there's nothing like that in here. Nuclear strikes do need a release code, yes, but it's kept secret by the United Nations.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Harriet Jones
Talking about: Nuclear bombs!


JACKIE: I'll get a proper job. I'll work weekends. I'll pass my test, and if Jim comes round again, I'll say no. I really will.
ROSE: I'm not leaving because of you. I'm travelling, that's all, and then I'll come back.
JACKIE: But it's not safe.
ROSE: Mum, if you saw it out there you'd never stay home.

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Jackie tries to persuade her daughter to stay home.
Notes: A man - "Jim" is mentioned in this conversation, but he's just window dressing to the bigger issue: Rose leaving her mother behind.


Written by Russell T Davies

CATHICA: Okay. So, ladies, gentlemen, multi-sex, undecided or robot- my name is Cathica Santini Khadeni. That's Cathica with a C, in case you want to write to Floor five hundred praising me, and please do. Now, please feel free to ask any questions. The process of news gathering must be open, honest, and beyond bias. That's company policy.
SUKI: Actually, it's the law.
CATHICA: Yes, thank you, Suki. Okay, keep it calm. Don't show off for the guests. Here we go.

More than one woman: Cathica, Suki
Talking about: As they work, the two women snipe at each other a little.


(Suki pulls her hands away as if she has just received an electric shock. The other six lift their hands and the information beam shuts down. Cathica's portal closes.)
CATHICA: Come off it, Suki. I wasn't even halfway. What was that for?
SUKI: Sorry. It must've been a glitch.

More than one woman: Cathica, Suki
Talking about: Their work.


SUKI: I don't believe it. Floor five hundred.
CATHICA: How the hell did you manage that? I'm above you.
SUKI: I don't know. I just applied on the off chance and they've said yes.
CATHICA: That's so not fair. I've been applying to Floor five hundred for three years.

More than one woman: Cathica, Suki
Talking about: Cathica is annoyed Suki’s been promoted over her.


Written by Paul Cornell

SARAH: How do you mean, missing?
BEV: There's no Dave, no Sunita, no Bea.
SUZIE: There's no one from the Lamb and Flag.
SARAH: Oh, my train's detached again. I knew I should've used Velcro.
JACKIE: I'm here. Stop your bellyaching. Take Rose a sec, will you?
(Jackie hands over a baby in a carry cot.)
BEV: Oh, ain't she pretty?
JACKIE: She's a little madam, that's what she is.

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Bev, Suzie, Sarah
Talking about: Some people haven’t turned up for the wedding. Everyone’s fussing about their dresses and things.


JACKIE: And who's this? What're you looking at with your mouth open?
ROSE: Your hair.
JACKIE: What?!
ROSE: I've never seen it like. I mean, it's lovely. Your hair's lovely. And that baby you're holding. That would be your baby.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler
Talking about: Rose is shocked to see her mother as a younger woman.


Written by Steven Moffat

NANCY: Who are you? Who are any of you?
ROSE: You'd never believe me if I told you.
NANCY: You just told me that was an ambulance from another world. There are people running around with gas mask heads calling for their mummies, and the sky's full of Germans dropping bombs on me. Tell me, do you think there's anything left I couldn't believe?
ROSE: We're time travellers from the future.
NANCY: Mad, you are.
ROSE: We have a time travel machine. seriously!
NANCY: It's not that. All right, you've got a time travel machine. I believe you. Believe anything, me. But what future?
ROSE: Nancy, this isn't the end. I know how it looks, but it's not the end of the world or anything
NANCY: How can you say that? Look at it.
ROSE: Listen to me. I was born in this city. I'm from here, in like, fifty years time.
NANCY: From here?
ROSE: I'm a Londoner. From your future.
NANCY: But, but you're not
ROSE: What?
NANCY: German.
ROSE: Nancy, the Germans don't come here. They don't win. Don't tell anyone I told you so, but you know what? You win.
NANCY: We win?
ROSE: Come on!

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Nancy
Talking about: Time travel, and what Rose knows about the future.


Written by Russell T Davies

CATHY: Excuse me, Mrs Blaine? My name's Cathy Salt, I represent the Cardiff Gazette.
MARGARET: I'm sorry, I'm not doing interviews. I can't bear self publicity.
CATHY: But are you aware of the curse?
MARGARET: Whatever do you mean? Cathy, wasn't it?
CATHY: Cathy Salt. That's what some of your engineers are saying, that the Blaidd Drwg Project is cursed.
MARGARET: Sounds rather silly to me.
CATHY: That's what I thought. I was just chasing a bit of local colour. But the funny thing is, when you start piecing it all together, it does begin to look a bit odd.
MARGARET: In what way?
CATHY: The deaths, the number of deaths associated with this project. First of all, there was the entire team of the European Safety Inspectors.
MARGARET: But they were French! It’s not my fault if Danger Explosives was only written in Welsh.
CATHY: And then there was that accident with the Cardiff Heritage Committee.
MARGARET: The electrocution of that swimming pool was put down to natural wear and tear.
CATHY: And then the architect?
MARGARET: It was raining, visibility was low. my car simply couldn't stop.
CATHY: And then just recently, Mister Cleaver, the government's nuclear adviser.
MARGARET: Slipped on an icy patch.
CATHY: He was decapitated.
MARGARET: It was a very icy patch. I'm afraid these stories are nothing more than typical small town thinking. I really haven't got time. If you'll excuse me.
CATHY: Except, before he died, Mister Cleaver posted some of his findings online.
MARGARET: Did he now?
CATHY: If you know where to look. He was concerned about the reactor.
MARGARET: Oh, all that technical stuff!
CATHY: Specifically, that the design of the suppression pool would cause the hydrogen recombiners to fail, precipitating in the collapse in the containment isolation system and resulting in a meltdown.
MARGARET: Who's been doing her homework?
CATHY: That's my job.
MARGARET: I think, Cathy Salt, I think you and I should have a word in private.

More than one woman: Margaret Blaine (really Blon Siltheen), Cathy Salt
Talking about: The suspicious goings-on surrounding the Blaidd Drwg Project.


MARGARET: So, you were saying. These outlandish theories of yours?
(Margaret dashes into a cubicle. There are squelchy sounds.)
CATHY: Sounds like we got here just in time.
MARGARET: Continue.
CATHY: Well, I don't know much about nuclear physics, but from what I could make out, Cleaver was saying that the whole project could go up worse than Chernobyl.
(Margaret unzips her forehead. Cathy notices the light under the door.)
CATHY: Is there something wrong with the lights?
MARGARET: Oh, they're always on the blink. I can't tell you how many memos I've sent. So, Chernobyl.
CATHY: Apparently, but a thousand times worse. I know it sounds absurd, there must be so many safety regulations. But Cleaver seemed to be talking about a nuclear holocaust. He almost made it sound deliberate. I mean, we're hardly the Sunday Times, we're only the Cardiff Gazette, but we still have a duty to report the facts.
MARGARET: And you're going to print this information?
CATHY: Are you all right? You sound a bit.
MARGARET: Sore throat. Ahem, ahem. Just a little tickle. But tell me, do you intend to make this information public?
CATHY: I have to.
MARGARET: So be it.
CATHY: Mind you, my boyfriend thinks I'm mad. We're getting married next month, and he says if I cause a fuss, I could lose my job just when we need the money.
MARGARET: Boyfriend?
CATHY: Jeffery. Civil Servant. He's nothing exciting, but he's mine.
MARGARET: When's the wedding?
CATHY: The nineteenth. It's really just to stop my mother from nagging, but the baby sort of clinched it, I suppose.
MARGARET: You're with child?
(Margaret sits on the toilet.)
CATHY: Three months. It's not showing yet. Wasn't planned, it was an accident. Nice accident, though.
MARGARET: Congratulations.
CATHY: Thank you. How about you? You got any kids?
CATHY: Is there a Mister Blaine?
MARGARET: Not anymore. I'm all on my own. I had quite a sizeable family, once upon a time. Wonderful brothers. Oh, they were bold. But all of them gone now. Maybe you're right. Maybe I'm cursed.
CATHY: No, no, I don't think so. Not really.
MARGARET: You're very kind. If you don't mind, I might be a while. You run along. Perhaps we could do this another day.
CATHY: Are you all right?
CATHY: Okay, I'll tell you what. I'll leave my details with your office. Thanks for talking.
MARGARET: Thank you.

More than one woman: Margaret Blaine (really Blon Siltheen), Cathy Salt
Talking about: The suspicious goings-on surrounding the Blaidd Drwg Project, still. Margaret is about to kill Cathy before she talks, but hesitates when she finds out she’s pregnant.
Notes: While a lot of male relatives of the women are mentioned in this conversation, it isn’t about any of them, so I think it passes.


Written by Russell T Davies

LYNDA: I won't forget you.
CROSBIE: I'm sorry I stole your soap.
LYNDA: I don't mind, honestly.

More than one woman: Lynda, Crosbie
Talking about: Crosbie’s last goodbye.






Written by Russell T Davies

ROSE: Is that Harriet Jones?
(Rose goes into the living room.)
JACKIE: Oh, never mind me.
ROSE: Why's she on the telly?
JACKIE: She's Prime Minister now. I'm eighteen quid a week better off. They're calling it Britain's Golden Age. I keep on saying my Rose has met her.
ROSE: Did more than that. Stopped World War Three with her. Harriet Jones.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler
Talking about: Another woman, Harriet Jones.

ROSE: That's only two streets away. What about Mo? Where's she living now?
JACKIE: I don't know. Peak District.
ROSE: Well, we'll go to cousin Mo's then.
JACKIE: No, it's Christmas Eve! We're not going anywhere! What're you babbling about?
ROSE: Mum. Where'd you get that tree?
(The Christmas tree is now green.)
ROSE: That's a new tree. Where'd you get it?
JACKIE: I thought it was you.
ROSE: How can it be me?
JACKIE: Well, you went shopping. There was a ring at the door, and there it was!
ROSE: No, that wasn't me.
JACKIE: Then who was it ?

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler
Talking about: Rose wants to leave the flat immediately. Turns out they’re in danger from a Christmas tree.


SALLY: And they're moving. The ship's still in flight now. We've got it on the Hubble array.
HARRIET: Moving in which direction?
SALLY: Towards us.
HARRIET: How fast?
SALLY: Very fast.
HARRIET: What was your name, again?
SALLY: Sally.
HARRIET: Thank you, Sally.

More than one woman: Harriet Jones, Sally
Talking about: The invading alien threat.


Written by Russell T Davies

JACKIE: Have you got everything?
ROSE: I've got everything, don't worry.
JACKIE: Be careful.
ROSE: You'll have to call Mo about that-
JACKIE: Oh, never mind Mo.
ROSE: Okay, I'm going now. I love you!
JACKIE: I love you.
ROSE: Love you, love you.

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose is saying goodbye to her mother.

CASSANDRA: But I'm so alone, hidden down here. The last Human in existence.
ROSE: Don't start that again. They've called this planet New Earth.
CASSANDRA: A vegetable patch.
ROSE: And there's millions of Humans out there. Millions of them.
CASSANDRA: Mutant stock.
ROSE: They evolved, Cassandra. They just evolved, like they should. You stayed still. You got yourself all pickled and preserved, and what good did it do you?
CASSANDRA: Oh, I remember that night. Drinks for the Ambassador of Thrace. That was the last time anyone told me I was beautiful. After that it all became such hard work.
ROSE: Well, you've got a knack for survival, I'll give you that.
CASSANDRA: But I've not been idle, Rose, tucked away underneath this hospital. I've been listening. The Sisters are hiding something.
ROSE: What do you mean?
CASSANDRA: Oh these cats have secrets. Hush, let me whisper. Come close.
ROSE: You must be joking if you think I'm coming anywhere near you.

More than one woman: Cassandra, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose is still mightily unimpressed by Cassandra’s prejudices. The two exchange some kidnapper-to-hostage talk.


CASS-ROSE: I will. As soon as I've found someone younger, and less common, then I'll junk her with the waste. Now hushaby. It's showtime.
JATT: Anything we can do to help?
CASS-ROSE: Straight to the point, Whiskers. I want money.
CASP: The Sisterhood is a charity. We don't give money. We only accept.
CASS-ROSE: The humans across the water pay you a fortune, and that's exactly what I need. A one-off payment, that's all I want. Oh, and perhaps a yacht. In return for which, I shall tell the city nothing of your institutional murder. Is that a deal?
CASP: I'm afraid not.
CASS-ROSE: I'd really advise you to think about this.
CASP: Oh, there's no need. I have to decline.
CASS-ROSE: I'll tell them, and you've no way of stopping me. You're not exactly Nuns with Guns. You're not even armed.
CASP: Who needs arms when we have claws?

More than one woman: Cassandra in Rose’s body, Sister Jatt, Sister Casp
Talking about: Cassandra attempts to blackmail the Sisters.


CASS-DOCTOR: Yap, yap, yap. God, it was tedious inside your head. Hormone city.
ROSE: We're going to die if-
(Matron Casp grabs her ankle.)
ROSE: Get off!
CASP: All our good work. All that healing. The good name of the Sisterhood. You have destroyed everything.
CASS-DOCTOR: Go and play with a ball of string.
CASP: Everywhere, disease. This is the human world. Sickness!
(A diseased arm reaches up and grasps Casp's ankle. She falls, screaming.)
ROSE: Move!

More than one woman: Cassandra in the Doctor’s body, Rose Tyler, Sister Casp
Talking about: Sister Casp tries to stop Cassandra escaping.


CASS-DOCTOR: Now what do we do?
ROSE: Use the sonic screwdriver.
CASS-DOCTOR: You mean this thing?
ROSE: Yes, I mean that thing.

More than one woman: Cassandra in the Doctor’s body, Rose Tyler
Talking about: The sonic screwdriver.

ROSE: Good luck.
(Cassandra in Chip’s body walks to her younger self)
CASSANDRA: (to her guests) …and if you actually see them, you're shocked. But don't quote me on that. Oh, naughty. À bientôt!
CASS-CHIP: Excuse me, Lady Cassandra.
CASSANDRA: I'm sorry, I don't need anything right now. I'm fine, thank you.
CASS-CHIP: No, I just wanted to say you look beautiful.
CASSANDRA: Well, that's very kind, you strange little thing. Thank you very much.
CASS-CHIP: I mean it. You look so beautiful.
CASSANDRA: Thank you.

More than one woman: Cassandra in Chip’s body, younger Cassandra, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Cassandra tells her younger self she is beautiful.


Written by Russell T Davies

ROSE: What's your name?
FLORA: Flora.
ROSE: Flora, we'll be safe. There's more people arrived downstairs, soldiers and everything, and they can help us. I promise. Come on. Okay? Come on.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Flora
Talking about: Rose tries to calm down the young maid.


ISOBEL: It won't open. They've sealed us in.
FLORA: Oh, my Lady. Look!
(Monks armed with the soldier's rifles stand outside.)
FLORA: They'll never let us out. They mean for us to die!
ISOBEL: Don't say that, Flora!

More than one woman: Isobel, Flora
Talking about: The women realise their situation.


ISOBEL: Mistletoe. They're all garlanded in mistletoe and the wolf doesn't attack them. Who brought this into the kitchen?
FLORA: It must've been the Brethren.
ISOBEL: Gather it up. Quickly. Every last scrap. Quick, now!

More than one woman: Isobel, Flora
Talking about: Isobel comes up with a plan to save herself and her servants.


VICTORIA: What will you do? Will you stay here?
ISOBEL: I don't think I could. I'd sell it, or I'd pull this place down.
VICTORIA: Although we may not speak of these events in public, they will not be forgotten, I promise you that. Your husband's sacrifice, the ingenuity of his father, they will live on.
ISOBEL: But how?
VICTORIA: I saw last night that Great Britain has enemies beyond imagination, and we must defend our borders on all sides. I propose an Institute to investigate these strange happenings and to fight them. I would call it Torchwood. The Torchwood Institute.

More than one woman: Queen Victoria, Isobel
Talking about: To defend Britain from aliens, Queen Victoria starts the Torchwood Institute. (Now, whatever happened to that?)
Notes: While men do feature heavily in this conversation, I think ultimately it’s not really about them. What do you think?


Written by Toby Whithouse

JACKSON: What're you doing?
ROSE: Calling an ambulance.
JACKSON: No need. She's quite all right.
(There is a whumph! like a sudden fire, and a scream.)
JACKSON: It's fine. She does that.
(The woman goes back into the smoke filled office. Rose sees that the spilt oil has eaten through metal.)

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackson
Talking about: The mysteriously injured dinner lady.


ROSE: Hello, can we focus? Does anyone notice anything strange about this? Rats in school?
SARAH: Well, obviously they use them in Biology lessons. They dissect them. Or maybe you haven't reached that bit yet. How old are you?
ROSE: Excuse me, no one dissects rats in school anymore. They haven't done that for years. Where are you from, the dark ages?

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Sarah Jane Smith
Talking about: The two women trade insults about the other’s age.


SARAH: It's not working.
ROSE: Give it to me.
SARAH: Used to work first time in my day.
ROSE: Well, things were a lot simpler back then.
SARAH: Rose, can I give you a bit of advice?
ROSE: I've got a feeling you're about to.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Sarah Jane Smith
Talking about: The sonic screwdriver, nostalgia.


ROSE: The thing is, when you two met they'd only just got rid of rationing. No wonder all that space stuff was a bit too much for you.
SARAH: I had no problem with space stuff. I saw things you wouldn't believe.
ROSE: Try me.
SARAH: Mummies.
ROSE: I've met ghosts.
SARAH: Robots. Lots of robots.
ROSE: Slitheen, in Downing Street.
SARAH: Daleks!
ROSE: Met the Emperor.
SARAH: Anti-matter monsters.
ROSE: Gas masked zombies.
SARAH: Real living dinosaurs.
ROSE: Real living werewolf.
SARAH: The Loch Ness Monster!
ROSE: Seriously?

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Sarah Jane Smith
Talking about: The two women try to one-up each other.


ROSE: I love it.
SARAH: Hey, you, what's forty seven times three hundred and sixty nine?
ROSE: No idea. It's gone now. The oil's faded.
SARAH: But you're still clever. More than a match for him.
ROSE: You and me both.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Sarah Jane Smith
Talking about: Rose is no longer a hyper-genius, but Sarah Jane tells her she’s still clever.
Notes: While the Doctor is heavily mentioned in this conversation, primarily it’s about Rose and Sarah Jane complimenting each other, so I think it passes.


Written by Steven Moffat

REINETTE: Oh, Katherine, you are too wicked.
KATHERINE: Oh, speaking of wicked, I hear Madame de Chateauroux is ill and close to death.
REINETTE: Yes. I am devastated.
KATHERINE: Oh, indeed. I myself am frequently inconsolable.

More than one woman: Reinette, Katherine
Talking about: Madame de Chateauroux. (Who was real!)
Notes: The next line is “The King will therefore be requiring a new mistress”. So naturally while these women are talking about another woman, they're also talking about an obstacle on their paths to the King being removed. But I feel this bit still counts as those four lines illustrate something about Reinette's character - she doesn't mind stepping over people in pursuit of power.


ROSE: Madame de Pompadour. Please, don't scream or anything. We haven't got a lot of time. I've come to warn you that they'll be here in five years.
REINETTE: Five years?
ROSE: Some time after your thirty seventh birthday. I er, I can't give you an exact date. It's a bit random. But they're coming. It's going to happen. In a way, for us, it's already happening. I'm sorry, it's hard to explain. The Doctor does this better.
REINETTE: Then be exact, and I will be attentive.
ROSE: There isn't time.
REINETTE: There are five years.
ROSE: For you. I haven't got five minutes.
REINETTE: Then also be concise.
ROSE: Er, there's, say, a vessel, a ship, a sort of sky ship, and it's full of, well, you. Different bits of your life in different rooms, all jumbled up. I told you it was complicated. Sorry.

More than one woman: Reinette, Rose Tyler
Talking about: The complicated nature of the situation Reinette is in.
Notes: After this bit, the conversation turns to be about the Doctor. But this bit isn’t! Course, it’s only really plot development, but it’s plot development being said by two women to each other.


REINETTE: Those screams. Is that my future?
ROSE: Yeah. I'm sorry.
REINETTE: Then I must take the slower path.

More than one woman: Reinette, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Reinette is stricken by her predicament. Rose is sorry.


Written by Tom Macrae

ROSE: Missis Tyler, is there anything I can get you?
JACKIE: The last twenty years back.
ROSE: I can manage a glass of champagne or a nice cup of tea?
JACKIE: Oh, that'd do me.
(Rose sits next to Jackie.)
ROSE: My mum loves that. End of a long night she never goes straight to bed, she always stays up just to have that last cup of tea.
JACKIE: Oh, I'm the same.
ROSE: Two sugars.
JACKIE: And me.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, the alternate version of Jackie Tyler
Talking about: Mostly, tea.


JACKIE: Are you commenting on my marriage?
ROSE: No, I was just-
JACKIE: Who the hell do you think you are? You're staff. You're nothing but staff. You're just the serving girl, for God's sake. And you are certainly not getting paid. Don't you dare talk to me.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, the alternate version of Jackie Tyler
Talking about: Alternate Jackie is furious (and instantly shows herself to be nothing like the real Jackie) when the unknown girl comments on her marriage.


Written by Tom Macrae

ROSE: How many of those you got?
MOORE: Just two sets.
ROSE: Okay. If that's the best way of finding Jackie, then I'm coming with you.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Mrs Moore
Talking about: Moore’s Cyber earpods.
Notes: Although Rose delivers the “If that’s the best way…” bit to the group, the “Okay” bit appears to be directed at Mrs Moore, so…a pass?


CYBERMAN: No, I am Cyber-form. Once I was Jacqueline Tyler.
ROSE: But you can't be. Not her.
CYBERMAN: Her brain is inside this body.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, … alternate, cyber-Jackie Tyler?
Talking about: What happened to her.
Notes: RIGHT THIS IS COMPLICATED. Is Cyber-Jackie still actually Jackie? She remembers Pete, so there’s a trace of the real Jackie in there, even though she’s in a genderless robot body. Since the Cybermen remember their old lives when the emotional inhibitor is removed, they retain a little humanity no matter what, apparently. So, er, since Jackie’s brain is still intact, she’s still essentially (though her emotions are inhibited) her, right? Bloody science fiction.




Written by Mark Gatiss

ROSE: That's just a woman on the telly. That's just a programme.
WIRE: What a pretty little girl.
ROSE: Oh, my God. Are you talking to me?
WIRE: Yes I'm talking to you, little one. Unseasonably chilly for the time of year, don't you think?
ROSE: What are you?
WIRE: I'm the Wire, and I'm hungry!

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, the Wire
Talking about: Rose is shocked to discover the woman on the TV has turned sentient.


Written by Matt Jones


IDA: Oxygen holding. Internal gravity fifty six point six. We should be okay.
ROSE: Never mind the earthquake, that's, that's one hell of a storm. What is that, a hurricane?
SCOOTI: You'd need an atmosphere for a hurricane. There's no air out there. It's a complete vacuum.
ROSE: Then what's shaking the roof?
IDA: You're not joking. You really don't know. Well introductions. F Y I, as they said in the olden days.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Ida, Scooti
Talking about: Space!


IDA: And yet here we are, beyond the laws of physics. Welcome on board.
ROSE: But if there's no atmosphere out there, what's that?
IDA: Stars breaking up. Gas clouds. We have whole solar systems being ripped apart above our heads, before falling into that thing.
ROSE: So, a bit worse than a storm, then.
IDA: Just a bit.
ROSE: Just a bit, yeah.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Ida
Talking about: Space! again.

ROSE: You've got slaves?
SCOOTI: Don't start. She's like one of that lot. Friends of the Ood.
ROSE: Well maybe I am, yeah. Since when do humans need slaves?

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Scooti
Talking about: Humankind’s dubious ‘ownership’ of the Ood.


Written by Matthew Graham

TRISH: Maeve? Are you okay?
MAEVE: No, love, I'm not.
TRISH: Do you want me to call a doctor?
MAEVE: Doctor can't help. Can't you, can't you feel it, Trish?
TRISH: I can't feel anything.

More than one woman: Trish Webber, Maeve
Talking about: Trish wants to help Maeve.


MAEVE: It takes them when they're playing.
ROSE: What takes them?
MAEVE: Danny, Jane, Dale. Snatched in the blink of an eye. 

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Maeve
Talking about: The missing children.


TRISH: You have to come down some time, Chloe.
CHLOE: I'm busy, mum.
TRISH: Look at it in here. You must've used up half a rainforest.
(Chloe is drawing the cat on Dale's picture. He is now sitting in the bottom left corner.)
TRISH: That's Dale. Why did you draw him so sad?
CHLOE: I didn't draw him like that. Dale made himself sad, so I'm going to draw him a friend. That's what he needs. More friends.
TRISH: Have you seen the TV?
(Trish clicks on Chloe's laptop, and News24 comes on with its live Countdown to the Games. Huw Edwards' soft Welsh lilt provides the commentary.)
TRISH: Look, this'll cheer you up. The Torch is getting close. It'll pass right by our street. And tonight they'll light the Olympic Flame in the stadium, and the whole world will be looking at our city. I mean, doesn't that make you feel part of something? Sweetheart? Chloe?
CHLOE: I'm busy, mum.
TELEVISION: Danny Fairweather carries the torch past them on this wonderful summer's day. Very fitting. We've seen lots of our sporting royalty, too…
TRISH: Okay. You're tired, Chloe. I heard you calling out again, last night.
CHLOE: It's fine.
TRISH: Nightmares?
CHLOE: I'm drawing!
TRISH: Whatever they are, they're just dreams, you do know that? They can't hurt you.
CHLOE: I'm busy. Unless you want me to draw you, mum.
TRISH: If you want to stay cooped up in here, fine. I'll leave you to it.
(Trish leaves. The cat is finished.)

More than one woman: Trish Webber, Chloe Webber
Talking about: Trish tries and fails to draw (hehehe. Draw.) her daughter out of herself. Chloe’s responses are almost threatening…


CHLOE: We need to stay together.
TRISH: Yes, we do.
CHLOE: No. Not you, us. We need to stay together, and then it'll be all right.
ROSE: Trish, the drawings. Have you seen what Chloe's drawings can do?
TRISH: Who gave you permission to come into her room? Get out of my house.

More than one woman: Trish Webber, Chloe Webber, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose knows that little Chloe is trapping people in drawings, but Trish won’t accept it.


ROSE: Chloe has a power. And I don't know how, but she used it to take Danny Edwards, Dale Hicks. She's using it to snatch the kids.
TRISH: Get out.
ROSE: Have you seen those drawings move?
TRISH: I haven't seen anything.

More than one woman: Trish Webber, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose continues to probe.


ROSE: Chloe? Chloe, it's Rose! Open the door!
(Chloe rips down some pictures and starts drawing on the wall.)
ROSE: We found your ship. We can send you home.
TRISH: Chloe?
ROSE: Open up! (to TRISH) Right, stand back.

More than one woman: Trish Webber, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose and Trish try to get the attention of Chloe (and the thing inside her.)


ROSE: Look, I've got your pod.
CHLOE: The pod is dead.
ROSE: It only needs heat.
CHLOE: It needs more than heat.
ROSE: What, then?

More than one woman: Chloe Webber, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose tells Chloe/the thing inside her that she’s found it’s pod.
Notes: I’m not sure about this one, because is it Chloe talking or the Isolus? I don’t know.


TRISH: I'm here.
CHLOE: Mummy!

More than one woman: Trish Webber, Chloe Webber
Talking about: Chloe wants her mother.


CHLOE: Mummy!
ROSE: You can do it, Chloe!
CHLOE: I can't!
CHLOE'S DAD [OC]: Chloe, I'm coming.
CHLOE: I can't! I can't!
CHLOE'S DAD [OC]: I'm coming.
CHLOE: I can't.
CHLOE'S DAD [OC]: I'm coming.
CHLOE: Mummy.
CHLOE'S DAD [OC]: Chloe.
TRISH: I'm with you, Chloe. You're not alone. You'll never be alone again.
ROSE: Sing again! Chloe, sing!
CHLOE'S DAD [OC]: Chloe. Chloe. Chloe. Chloe. Chloe, I'm coming to hurt you. Chloe!
(CHLOE and TRISH start to sing)
CHLOE + TRISH: Merry merry king of the bush is he. Laugh, Kookaburra, laugh, Kookaburra, gay your life must be. Laugh, Kookaburra, laugh, Kookaburra, gay your life must be.
(The red glow fades and retreats.)
CHLOE + TRISH: Kookaburra sits in the old gum tree. Merry merry king of the bush is he. Laugh, Kookaburra, laugh, Kookaburra, gay your life must be!

More than one woman: Trish Webber, Chloe Webber, Rose Tyler
Talking about: The bond between mother and daughter is enough to send the figment of Chloe’s dad back where it came from.
Notes: Okay, a man (well, a male Malevolent Entity) features heavily here. He’s not really part of the actual conversation, you only hear his threatening voice and nothing else, but he is there. In your opinion, does this scene count as a pass? Because…well, because I really want it to, I suppose. It was an important scene.


Written by Russell T Davies

ROSE: Mum, it's us! We're back!
JACKIE: Oh, I don't know why you bother with that phone. You never use it!
ROSE: Shut up, come here!
JACKIE: Oh, I love you!
ROSE: I love you!
JACKIE: I love you so much!

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler
Talking about: They’re delighted to see each other again.


ROSE: Bazoolium. When it gets cold, yeah, it means it's going to rain. When it's hot, it's going to be sunny. You can use it to tell the weather.
JACKIE: I've got a surprise for you and all.
ROSE: Oh, I get her bazoolium, she doesn't even say thanks.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler
Talking about: This strange ‘bazoolium’ Rose has got for Jackie.


JACKIE: You've changed so much.
ROSE: For the better.
JACKIE: I suppose.
ROSE: Mum, I used to work in a shop.
JACKIE: I've worked in shops. What's wrong with that?
ROSE: No, I didn't mean that.
JACKIE: I know what you meant. What happens when I'm gone?
ROSE: Don't talk like that.
JACKIE: No, but really. When I'm dead and buried, you won't have any reason to come back home. What happens then?
ROSE: I don't know.
JACKIE: Do you think you'll ever settle down?
ROSE: The Doctor never will, so I can't. I'll just keep on travelling.
JACKIE: And you'll keep on changing. And in forty years’ time, fifty, there'll be this woman, this strange woman, walking through the marketplace on some planet a billion miles from Earth. But she's not Rose Tyler. Not anymore. She's not even human.

More than one woman: Rose Tyler, Jackie Tyler
Talking about: How much Rose has changed, and (in Jackie’s opinion) how it’s perhaps not for the better.
Notes: The Doctor does feature in (and, of course, hangs over) this conversation. But I think as it’s about Jackie’s fears much more than it’s about any man.


YVONNE: No, we shot it down. It violated our airspace. Then we stripped it bare. The weapon that destroyed the Sycorax on Christmas Day? That was us. Now, if you'd like to come with me. The Torchwood Institute has a motto. If it's alien, it's ours. Anything that comes from the sky, we strip it down and we use it for the good of the British Empire.
JACKIE: For the good of the what?
YVONNE: The British Empire.
JACKIE: There isn't a British Empire.
YVONNE: Not yet. Ah, excuse me. Now, if you wouldn't mind.

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Yvonne Hartman
Talking about: Torchwood and the British Empire.


Written by Russell T Davies

JACKIE: What happens in there? What's upgrading mean? What do they do?
YVONNE: I think they remove the brain. Sorry. I think they remove the brain and they put it in a suit of armour. That's what these things are. They're us.
JACKIE: This is your fault. You and your Torchwood. You've killed us all!
(Yvonne is taken away.)
YVONNE: I did my duty for Queen and Country. I did my duty. I did my duty. Oh, God. I did my duty.

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Yvonne Hartman
Talking about: The horrible thing that’s about to happen to them.
Notes: A Cyberman is involved in this conversation, but I still think it passes?


ROSE: You've got to.
JACKIE: Well, that's tough.
ROSE: Mum.

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose tries to send her mother away, but Jackie isn’t having it.






Written by Russell T Davies

NERYS: Well, it was all paid for. Why not?
DONNA: Thank you, Nerys.
SYLVIA: Well, what were we supposed to do? I got your silly little message in the end. I'm on Earth? Very funny. What the hell happened? How did you do it? I mean, what's the trick, because I'd love to know.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble, Nerys
Talking about: The paid-for wedding and Donna’s abrupt exit from it.


DONNA: But that's what I've got inside me, that Huon energy thing. Oi! Look at me, lady, I'm talking. Where do I fit in? How comes I get all stacked up with these Huon particles? Look at me, you! Look me in the eye and tell me.
EMPRESS: The bride is so feisty.
(Lance is sneaking up behind the giant Empress with a fire axe.)
DONNA: Yes, I am! And I don't know what you are, you big thing, but a spider's just a spider and an axe is an axe!

More than one woman: Donna Noble, the Empress of the Racnoss
Talking about: Donna demands answers.
Notes: This one is tricky because even though Donna is talking to the Empress, the Empress isn’t really talking to her. What do you think? A pass?



Written by Russell T Davies

MARTHA: No, listen, I've worked out a plan. We tell Annalise that the buffet tonight is one hundred per cent carbohydrate, and she won't turn up.
TISH: I wish you'd take this seriously. That's our inheritance she's spending, on fake tan. Tell you what, I'm not that far away, I'll drop by for a sandwich and we can draw up a battle plan.
MARTHA: In this weather? I'm not going out. It's pouring down.
TISH: It's not raining here.
(Tish turns the corner and sees a big black cloud over the hospital.)
TISH: That's weird. It's raining right on top of you, I can see it, but it's dry where I am.
MARTHA: Well, you just got lucky.
TISH: No, but it's like in cartoons. You know, when a man's got a cloud over his head.
MARTHA: Yeah, but listen. I'll tell you what we'll do.
(She sees the Doctor walk past wearing a dressing gown.)
MARTHA: We tell Dad and Annalise to get there early, about seven thirty, and we tell Leo get there at the same time so we can do all that birthday stuff. We tell Mum to get there for about eight thirty, nine, and that gives me time to have a word with Annalise, and-
(Swales touches Martha's arm.)
SWALES: The rain.
MARTHA: It's only rain.
TISH: Martha, have you seen the rain?
MARTHA: Why's everyone fussing about rain?
SWALES: It's going up.
TISH: The rain is going up.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Tish Jones, Julia Swales
Talking about: Annalise, the upcoming party, and the weather.


MARTHA: What the hell was that?
SWALES: Are you all right?
MARTHA: I think so, yeah. It felt like an earthquake, or-
SWALES: Martha? It's night. Look. It was lunchtime.
MARTHA: It's not night.
SWALES: But it's got to be. It's dark.
MARTHA: We're on the moon.
(A half Earth hangs in the black sky over a cratered surface.)
SWALES: We can't be.
MARTHA: We're on the moon. We're on the bloody moon.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Julia Swales
Talking about: Their sudden transportation to the moon.


MARTHA: It's real. It's really real. Hold on.
(Martha reaches to open the window.)
SWALES: Don't! We'll lose all the air.
MARTHA: But they're not exactly air tight. If the air was going to get sucked out it would have happened straight away, but it didn't. So how come?

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Julia Swales
Talking about: The airtight windows.


TISH: (hugging MARTHA) Martha! Oh, God! I thought you were dead! What happened? It was so weird, because the police wouldn't say. They didn't have a clue. And I tried phoning. Mum's on her way, but she can't get through. They've closed off all the roads.
(The Doctor sneaks back to the TARDIS.)
TISH: There's thousands of people trying to get in. The whole city's come to a halt. And Dad phoned, because it's on the news and everything. He was crying.
(The sound of the TARDIS dematerialising.)
TISH: Oh, what a mess. What happened? I mean, what really happened? Where were you?

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Tish Jones
Talking about: Tish is relieved to see her sister.
Notes: This one’s awkward because Martha doesn’t react verbally to Tish (she’s still watching the Doctor leave). But she does react non-verbally – a hug back, a look, a smile – so I think it counts.


FRANCINE: And then she has a go at Martha, practically accused her of making the whole thing up.
MARTHA: Mum, I don't mind. Just leave it.
ANNALISE: Oh. ‘I've been to the moon!’ As if. They were drugged. It said so on the news.
FRANCINE: Since when did you watch the news? You can't handle Quiz Mania.
TISH: Annalise started it. She did. I heard her.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Tish Jones, Francine Jones, Annalise
Talking about: Whether Martha really went to the moon or not.



Written by Russell T Davies

MARTHA: Don't you dare! Don't put that stuff in me, don't! Get off me!
CHEEN: It's just Sleep Fourteen. No, baby, don't fight it.
MARTHA: I'm telling you, don't!
(Martha falls asleep.)
CHEEN: That's it. Come on. That's it.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Cheen
Talking about: Martha tries to stop Cheen drugging her.


MARTHA: Take me back. Whoever you are, just take me back to my friend. That's all I want. I won't cause any trouble. Just take me back.
CHEEN: I'm sorry. That's not a real gun.
MARTHA: Yeah, well, you would say that.
CHEEN: Where do you get a gun from, these days? I wouldn't even know how to fire.
MARTHA: No, nor me. Okay.
(Martha puts the gun down.)
CHEEN: What's your name?
MARTHA: Martha. Martha Jones.
CHEEN: Well, I'm Cheen, and this is Milo. And I swear we're sorry. We're really, really sorry. We just needed access to the fast line, but I promise, as soon as we arrive, we'll drop you off and you can go back and find your friend.
MARTHA: Seriously?
CHEEN: I swear! Look. Honesty patch. 

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Cheen
Talking about: Cheen explains Martha’s situation.


CHEEN: Well, because of me. I'm pregnant. We only discovered it last week. Scan says it's going to be a boy.
MARTHA: Right. What do I do now, congratulate my kidnappers?
CHEEN: Oh, we're not kidnappers. Not really.
MARTHA: Nope? You're idiots. You're having a baby, and you're wearing that?
(Martha pulls the Honesty patch from Cheen's neck.)
MARTHA: Not anymore.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Cheen
Talking about: The drug that Cheen is taking.


CHEEN: It's only ten miles.
MARTHA: How long is it going to take?
CHEEN: About six years.
CHEEN: Be just in time for him to start school.
MARTHA: No, sorry, hold on. Six years? Ten miles in six years? How come?

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Cheen
Talking about: The length of the journey.


MARTHA: How many cars are out there?
CHEEN: I don't think anyone knows. Here we go. Hungry?
MARTHA: Oh, thanks. But how far down is it to this fast lane?

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Cheen
Talking about: Cars and the fast lane.


MARTHA: What's that? It's coming from underneath.
CHEEN: It's that noise, doesn't it? It's like Kate said. The stories, they're true.
MARTHA: What stories?

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Cheen
Talking about: Whatever it is lurking in the smoke…



Written by Helen Raynor

TALLULAH: Girls, it's showtime!
MYRNA: Lois, you spoil my chasse tonight, I'm going to punch you.
LOIS: Aw, quick complaining, Myrna. Go buy yourself some glasses.

More than one woman: Tallulah, Myrna, Lois
Talking about: Their work!

TALLULAH: Come on, honey. Take a look. Ever been on stage before?
MARTHA: Oh, a little bit. You know, Shakespeare.
TALLULAH: How dull is that? Come and see a real show.

More than one woman: Tallulah, Martha Jones
Talking about: Being on stage.


MYRNA: What are you doing?
(Martha accidentally grabs a devil's tail and they both fall.)
TALLULAH: What are you doing?
LOIS: You're on my tail. Get off my tail!

More than one woman: Tallulah, Myrna, Lois, Martha Jones
Talking about: Martha accidentally messing up the show.



Written by Helen Raynor

MARTHA: Wait a minute. Down in the sewers, the Daleks mentioned this energy conductor.
TALLULAH: What does that mean?
MARTHA: I don't know. Maybe like a lightening conductor or - Dalekanium!
MARTHA: They said the Dalekanium was in place.
TALLULAH: In place where?

More than one woman: Tallulah, Martha Jones
Talking about: Daleks and their Dalekanium.


MARTHA: The ones underneath, they're from before. That means that whatever they changed must be on this top sheet but not on this one. We need to check one against the other.
TALLULAH: The height of this place! This is amazing.
MARTHA: Careful, we're a hundred floors up. Don't go wandering off.
TALLULAH: I just want to see.

More than one woman: Tallulah, Martha Jones
Talking about: The building that they’re in.


MARTHA: Actually, I'm a doctor. Well, kind of.
TALLULAH: You're a physician? Really?
MARTHA: I was training. Still am, if I ever get back home.

More than one woman: Tallulah, Martha Jones
Talking about: Martha’s career.


MARTHA: Gotcha. Look. There, on the mast. Those little lines? They're new. They've added something, see?
TALLULAH: Added what?
BOTH: Dalekanium!

More than one woman: Tallulah, Martha Jones
Talking about: That Dalekanium again.



Written by Stephen Greenhorn

TISH: Hello.
TISH: You look great. So, what do you think? Impressive, isn't it?
TISH: And two nights out in a row for you. That's dangerously close to a social life.
MARTHA: If I keep this up, I'll end up in all the gossip columns.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Tish Jones
Talking about: Martha’s lack of a social life.


MARTHA: She's in the PR department.
TISH: I'm head of the PR department, actually.
MARTHA: You're joking.
TISH: I put this whole thing together.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Tish Jones
Talking about: Tish’s job.


(Martha gives her mother a big hug.)
FRANCINE: All right, what's the occasion?
MARTHA: What do you mean? I'm just pleased to see you, that's all.
FRANCINE: You saw me last night.
MARTHA: I know. I just miss you.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: Martha is pleased to see her mother again.


FRANCINE: You disappeared last night.
MARTHA: I just went home.
FRANCINE: On your own?

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: Where Martha went last night.


TISH: We can't get out. We're trapped!
MARTHA: There must be an override switch. Where's the security desk? Tish!
TISH: There.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Tish Jones
Talking about: The override switch.

MARTHA: I've got to go back.
FRANCINE: You can't! You saw what that thing did. It'll kill you.
MARTHA: I don't care. I have to go.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: Francine tries to keep Martha out of danger.


MARTHA: Stay behind me. If he takes me, make a run for it. Head down the stairs. You should have enough time.
TISH: But-
MARTHA: Just do it, Tish!

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Tish Jones
Talking about: Martha tries to protect her sister.



Written by Chris Chibnall

MARTHA: Mum? It's me. It's Martha. Wow!
FRANCINE: Where are you? Don't you check your messages? I've been calling you.
MARTHA: Actually, a bit busy. Need you to do something for me.
FRANCINE: No, listen to me. We have to talk about this Doctor.
MARTHA: Mum, please, not now. I need you to look something up on the internet.
FRANCINE: Do it yourself. You've got a computer.
MARTHA: Oh, just do it, will you? Please.
FRANCINE: When did you get so rude? I'll tell you when. Ever since you met that man.
MARTHA: I need to know who had more number ones. The Beatles or Elvis?
FRANCINE: Hang on, the mouse is unplugged. Okay, I'm on. What is this, a pub quiz?
MARTHA: Yeah, a pub quiz.
FRANCINE: Using your mobile is cheating.
MARTHA: Have you found it?
FRANCINE: There's over four hundred thousand results. Give me a minute.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: Martha calls her mother to help her with the security questions.
Notes: The Doctor is mentioned in this scene, but I think it still passes as it’s not really about him.


MARTHA: Mum, you're a star!
FRANCINE: Now, we need to have a serious-
(Abi's scream comes over the intercom, and Martha's phone.)
FRANCINE: What was that?
MARTHA: I've got to go.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: Francine is concerned about where Martha is and what she’s up to.


MARTHA [OC]: It's me again. Sorry about earlier.
FRANCINE [OC]: Is everything all right?
MARTHA: Yeah. Of course.
MARTHA: Mum, I. you know I love you, don't you?
FRANCINE: Of course I do. What's bought this on?
MARTHA: I never say it. I never get the time. I never think of it, and then- I really love you. Tell Dad, Leo and Tish that I love them.
(A blonde woman in a black suit is monitoring the conversation.)
FRANCINE: Martha, what's wrong?
MARTHA: Nothing. I promise.
FRANCINE: Where are you?
MARTHA: Just out.
FRANCINE: With anyone nice?
MARTHA: Some mates.
FRANCINE: What mates?
MARTHA: Mum, can we not just talk?
FRANCINE: Of course. What do you want to talk about?
MARTHA: I don't know. Anything! What you had for breakfast. What you watched on telly last night. How much you're going to kill Dad next time you see him. Just anything.
FRANCINE: Is the Doctor with you? Is he there, now?
MARTHA: Mum, just leave it.
FRANCINE: It's a simple enough question.
MARTHA: I'd better go.
(The woman makes the circular keep going gesture.)
FRANCINE: Er, no, Martha, wait.
MARTHA: See you, Mum.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: Martha thinks she’s going to die, so she calls her mother to tell her she loves her.


MARTHA: What happened?
McDONNELL: Power's been cut in Engineering.
MARTHA: But who's down there?
McDONNELL: Leave it to me.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Kath McDonnell
Talking about: What’s happened in Engineering.


MARTHA: Oh, no. Mum.
(Francine answers her mobile phone.)
MARTHA: It's me again.
FRANCINE: Three calls in one day.
MARTHA: I'm sorry about earlier. Over emotional. Mad day.
FRANCINE: What are you doing tonight? Why don't you come round? I'll make something nice and we can catch up.
MARTHA: Yeah. Tonight. Do my best. Er, just remind me. What day is it again?
FRANCINE: Election day.
MARTHA: Right. Of course. I'll be round for tea. Roughly.
FRANCINE: And what about-
MARTHA: Anyway, I've got to go! See you later. Love you.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: Martha tries to explain away her emotional behaviour.



Written by Paul Cornell

(Evening. Martha brings two pints to a table.)
MARTHA: Ooo, it's freezing out here. Why can't we have a drink inside the pub?
JENNY: Now don't be ridiculous. You do get these notions! It's all very well, those Suffragettes. but that's London. That's miles away.
MARTHA: But don't you just want to scream sometimes, having to bow and scrape and behave. Don't you just want to tell them?
JENNY: I don't know. Things must be different in your country.
MARTHA: Yeah, well they are. Thank God I'm not staying.
JENNY: You keep saying that.
MARTHA: Just you wait. One more month and I'm as free as the wind. I wish you could come with me, Jenny. You'd love it.
JENNY: Where are you going to go?
MARTHA: Anywhere. Just look up there. Imagine you could go all the way out to the stars.
JENNY: You don't half say mad things.
MARTHA: That's where I'm going. Into the sky, all the way out.
(Something flashes in the sky.)
MARTHA: Did you see that?
JENNY: See what?
MARTHA: Did you see it, though? Right up there, just for a second.
JENNY: Martha, there's nothing there.
(Joan is walking through a field when she is blinded by a green light that appears to be searching the ground. Then it disappears. She runs.)
MARTHA: Matron, are you all right?
JOAN: Did you see that? There was something in the woods. This light.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Jenny, Joan Redfern
Talking about: Their rights, Martha’s ‘mad things’ and a thing in the sky.


MARTHA: Jenny, where was that? On the horizon, where the light was headed.
JENNY: That's by Cooper's Field.
(Martha leaves.)
JENNY: You can't just run off. It's dark. You'll break a leg.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Jenny
Talking about: Where the light fell.
Notes: Does this count as more than two lines? It must do, surely….


(Martha is pouring a cup of tea when Jenny comes in. The tray has two cups and a small cake on a stand.)
MARTHA: There you are. Come and look what I've got. Mister Poole didn't want his afternoon tea so Cook said I could have it. And there's enough for two. What are you standing there for?
(Jenny sniffs deeply.)
MARTHA: Are you all right?
JENNY: I must have a cold coming on.
MARTHA: The problem is, I keep thinking about them, but I don't know what to do.
JENNY: Thinking about who?
MARTHA: Mister Smith and Matron. Because it's never going to last. He's going to leave in a few weeks.
MARTHA: It's like his contract comes to an end. And she's going to be heartbroken.
JENNY: Leave for where?
MARTHA: All sorts of places. I wish I could tell you, Jenny, but it's complicated.
JENNY: In what way?
MARTHA: I just can't.
JENNY: It sounds so interesting. Tell me. Tell me now.
MARTHA: Would you like some tea?
JENNY: Yes, thanks.
MARTHA: I could put a nice bit of gravy in the pot. And some mutton. Or sardines and jam. How about that?
JENNY: I like the sound of that.
MARTHA: Right. Hold on a tick.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Mother Of Mine in Jenny’s body
Talking about: Jenny starts pressing Martha for information. Martha instantly suspects something is up.
Notes: While some of the first part of this is about the Doctor, the rest is about Martha’s quick thinking.



Written by Paul Cornell

MARTHA: What happened to Jenny? Is she gone?
JENNY: She is consumed. Her body's mine.
MARTHA: You mean she's dead.
JENNY: Yes. And she went with precious little dignity. All that screaming.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Mother Of Mine in Jenny’s body
Talking about: Martha wants to know what happened to her friend.


MARTHA: I'm training to be a doctor. Not an alien doctor, a proper doctor. A doctor of medicine.
JOAN: Well that certainly is nonsense. Women might train to be doctors, but hardly a skivvy and hardly one of your colour.
MARTHA: Oh, do you think? Bones of the hand. Carpal bones, proximal row. Scaphoid, lunate, triquetal, pisiform. Distal row. Trapezium, trapezoid, capitate, hamate. Then the metacarpal bones extending in three distinct phalanges. Proximal, middle, distal.
JOAN: You read that in a book.
MARTHA: Yes, to pass my exams. Can't you see this is true?
JOAN: I must go.
MARTHA: If we find that watch, then we can stop them.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Joan Redfern
Talking about: Joan doesn’t believe a black woman could ever be a doctor. Martha swiftly proves her wrong.


JOAN: Oh, here we are. It should be empty. Oh, it's a long time since I've run that far.
MARTHA: But who lives here?
JOAN: If I'm right, no one.
(It is dark inside. The table is laid for tea.)
JOAN: Hello? No one home. We should be safe here.
MARTHA: Whose house is it, though?
JOAN: Er, the Cartwrights. That little girl at the school, she's Lucy Cartwright, or she's taken Lucy Cartwright's form. If she came home this afternoon and if the parents tried to stop their little girl, then they were vanished.
(Joan touches the teapot.)
JOAN: Stone cold. How easily I accept these ideas.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Joan Redfern
Talking about: What happened to Lucy and her parents.



Written by Steven Moffat

KATHY: Hello?
SALLY: Bit freaked. Need to talk. Making you a coffee.
KATHY: Sally Sparrow, it's one in the morning. Do you think I'm coming round at one in the morning?
SALLY: No. I'm in the kitchen. What's that on all those screens in your front room?

More than one woman: Kathy Nightingale, Sally Sparrow
Talking about: Sally’s come to see her friend (and make her coffee) at one in the morning.


(Sally and Kathy climb the gates in daylight.)
KATHY: Okay, let's investigate! You and me, girl investigators. Love it. Hey! Sparrow and Nightingale. That so works.
KATHY: I know!
KATHY: What did you come here for anyway?
SALLY: I love old things. They make me feel sad.
KATHY: What's good about sad?
SALLY: It's happy for deep people.
(She looks at the writing on the wall, then walks out into the conservatory to look at the garden.)
SALLY: The Weeping Angel.
KATHY: Not bad in my garden.
SALLY: It's moved.
KATHY: It's what?
SALLY: Since yesterday. I'm sure of it. It's closer. It's got closer to the house.
(Sally looks at the text on the wall)
SALLY: How can my name be written here? How is that possible?
(The doorbell rings.)
KATHY: Who'd come here? What are you doing? It could be a burglar.
SALLY: A burglar who rings the doorbell?
KATHY: Okay. I'll stay here in case of-
SALLY: In case of?
KATHY: Incidents?
SALLY: Okay. 

More than one woman: Kathy Nightingale, Sally Sparrow
Talking about: Investigating the haunted house, the Weeping Angel, Sally’s view on sad things, and the writing on the wall.



Written by Russell T Davies

CHANTHO: Chan but I am happy to serve tho.
MARTHA: Do you mind if I ask? Do you have to start every sentence with chan?
CHANTHO: Chan yes tho.
MARTHA: And end every sentence with-
CHANTHO: Chan tho tho.
MARTHA: What would you happen if you didn't?
CHANTHO: Chan that would be rude tho.
MARTHA: What, like swearing?
CHANTHO: Chan indeed tho.
MARTHA: Go on, just once.
CHANTHO: Chan I can't tho.
MARTHA: Oh, do it for me.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Chantho
Talking about: Chantho’s speech patterns.



Written by Russell T Davies

VIVIEN: Mrs Saxon. Vivien Rook, Sunday Mirror. You've heard of me.
LUCY: Oh, can't I just have an hour to myself? It's been a hell of a day.
VIVIEN: Oh, strike while the iron's hot, that's what I say, Lucy. I can call you Lucy, can't I? Now, everyone's talking about Harold Saxon, but I thought, What about the wife? All I need is twenty minutes.
LUCY: Oh, I think maybe we should wait.
VIVIEN: The headline's waiting to print. The Power Behind the Throne.
LUCY: Really?
VIVIEN: Britain's First Lady.
LUCY: Gosh.
VIVIEN: Front page.
LUCY: Oh. Well, I suppose. Oh, go on then. Twenty minutes.
VIVIEN: Excellent! Thank you. Go, go, what was it? Er, Tish. Now you can leave us alone.
(Vivien gives Tish her coat.)
TISH: No, but I'm supposed to sit in?
VIVIEN: No, no, it's only a profile piece. You know, hair and clothes and nonsense. There's a good girl. Out you go. That's it.

More than one woman: Vivien Rook, Lucy Saxon, Tish Jones
Talking about: Lucy’s interview.


MARTHA: Mum? Oh my God. You're there.
FRANCINE: Of course I'm here, sweetheart. You all right?
MARTHA: I'm fine. I'm fine. Mum. Has there been anyone asking about me?
(The woman in black is listening in to the call.)
FRANCINE: Martha, I think perhaps you should come round.
MARTHA: I can't. Not now.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: The danger both of them are now in.



Written by Russell T Davies

MARTHA: They're not called Toclafane. That's a name the Master made up.
DOCHERTY: Then what are they, then?
MARTHA: That's why I came to find you. Know your enemy. (DOCHERTY gives her a funny look.) I've got this.
(A computer disc.)
MARTHA: No one's been able to look at a sphere close up. They can't even be damaged, except once. The lightning strike in South Africa brought one of them down, just by chance. I've got the readings on this.
(Docherty puts the disc into her computer, and thumps it as it struggles to read the data.)

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Docherty
Talking about: The Toclafane.







Written by Russell T Davies

FOSTER: One hundred percent legal, one hundred percent effective.
PENNY: But, can I just ask, how many people have taken the pills to date?
FOSTER: We've already got one million customers within the Greater London area alone, but from next week, we start rolling out nationwide. The future starts here. And Britain will be thin.

More than one woman: Miss Foster, Penny Carter
Talking about: Miss Foster’s pills.


DONNA: Stacy Campbell?
STACY: Who wants to know?
DONNA: My name's Donna. I represent Adipose Industries, and you're on the list of our valued customers.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Stacy Campbell
Talking about: Stacy being a valued customer.


STACY: It's been fantastic. I've started the pills on Thursday. Five days later, I've lost eleven pounds.
DONNA: And no side effects or anything?
STACY: No, I feel fantastic. It's a new lease of life. Now, what do you think about these earrings. Do they work?
DONNA: Yeah, lovely. 

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Stacy Campbell
Talking about: Stacy’s pills and Stacy’s earrings.


DONNA: I like what you've done with the hall. Stacy? Are you all right? I wouldn't mind a little visit myself. Everything all right in there?
(She knocks on the bathroom door.)
DONNA: It's only me. Do you mind if I pop to the loo? Stacy?
(Lots of lumps are moving around below Stacy's clothes.)
STACY: Oh, help me. Oh my God, help me!
DONNA: What is it, what's wrong?
(Stacy has bolted the door on the inside.)
DONNA: Stacy!

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Stacy Campbell
Talking about: Stacy needs help, but Donna can’t help her.


SYLVIA: And what time's this?
DONNA: How old am I?
SYLVIA: Not old enough to use a phone.
(A little later, Donna is sitting at the kitchen table with a mug of drink.)
SYLVIA: I thought you were only moving back for a couple of weeks. Look at you. I mean, you're never gonna find a flat, not while you're on the dole. And it’s no good sitting there, dressed up, looking like you're job hunting. You've got to do something. It's not like the 1980s. No one's unemployed these days except you. How long did that job with Health and Safety last? Two days, and then you walk out. “I have other plans.” Well, I've not seen them. And it's no good sitting there dreaming. No one's going to come along with a magic wand and make your life all better.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: Donna gets a long lecture from her mother about how her life is going.


DONNA: (sotto) Not now.
SYLVIA: I need the car. Where are you?
DONNA: I can't. I'm busy.
SYLVIA: Why are you whispering?
DONNA: I'm in church.
SYLVIA: What are you doing in church?
DONNA: Praying.
SYLVIA: Huh, bit late for that, madam.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: Donna invents a lie to explain why her mother can’t have the car.


FOSTER: We know you're in here, so why don't you make this nice and easy and show yourself? I'm waiting. I warn you, I'm not a patient woman. Now, out you come. Right. We'll do it the hard way. Get her.
(The guards kick open the cubicle doors. The fifth one contains Penny the reporter.)
FOSTER: There you are.
PENNY: I've been through the records, Foster, and all of your results have been faked. There's something about those pills you're not telling us.
FOSTER: Oh, I think I'll be conducting this interview, Penny.
PENNY: You've got no right to do this. Let me go!
(The Doctor lowers the cradle to Miss Foster's window. He ducks out of sight when they enter.)
PENNY: This is ridiculous.
FOSTER: Sit there.
PENNY: I'm phoning my editor.
FOSTER: I said sit.
(The Doctor uses a stethoscope to listen to the conversation.)
PENNY: You can't tie me up. What sort of a country do you think this is?
FOSTER: Oh, it's a beautifully fat country. And believe me, I've travelled a long way to find obesity on this scale.
PENNY: So, come on then, Miss Foster, those pills. What are they?
(Donna has arrived at the secretary's station outside the office.)
FOSTER: Well, you might just as well have a scoop, since you'll never see it printed. This (a capsule) is the spark of life.
PENNY: And what's that supposed to mean?
FOSTER: Officially, the capsule attracts all the fat cells and flushes them away. Well, it certainly attracts them. That part's true. But it binds the fat together and galvanises it to form a body.
PENNY: What do you mean, a body?
FOSTER: I am surprised you never asked about my name. I chose it well. Foster. As in foster mother. And these are my children.
(She takes a little creature out of a drawer and puts it on the desk.)
PENNY: You're kidding me. What the hell is that?
(Donna and the Doctor both look through the windows.)
FOSTER: Adipose. It's called an Adipose. Made out of living fat.
PENNY: But I don't understand.
FOSTER: From ordinary human people.

More than one woman: Miss Foster, Penny Carter
Talking about: Miss Foster explains her evil scheme to Penny.


SYLVIA: It's like a miracle. All that from just one little pill.
SUZETTE: And I've been eating like normal.
(Suzette starts twitching and growling.)
SYLVIA: You all right, love?
SUZETTE: Yeah, I'm just. Just. Funny sort of feeling, like-

More than one woman: Sylvia Noble, Suzette
Talking about: Those miracle pills…


DONNA: I know, Mum. I saw it. Little fat people. Listen, I've got to go. I'm going to stay with Veena for a bit.
SYLVIA: It was in the sky!
DONNA: Yeah. I know. Spaceship. But, I've still got the car keys. Look. There is a bin on Brook Street, about thirty feet from the corner. I'm going to leave them in there.
SYLVIA: What, a bin?
DONNA: Yes, that's it. Bin.
(The same bin the Doctor threw the pen into?)
SYLVIA: But you can't do that.
DONNA: Oh, stop complaining. The car's just down the road a bit. Got to go. Really. Got to go. Bye.
SYLVIA: But Donna, you can't
(Donna goes over to some people by the police barriers and speaks to a blonde.)
DONNA: Listen, there is this woman that's going to come along. A tall blond woman called Sylvia. Tell her that bin there, all right? It'll all make sense. That bin there.
(Donna leaves. The blonde turns around to face us. It is Rose Tyler. She walks away and disappears.) 

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble, Rose Tyler
Talking about: The aliens and the car keys.



Written by James Moran and Russell T Davies

METELLA: Have you been consuming?
EVELINA: Not this morning.
METELLA: Come on sweetheart, practise. It's hot today. The hypocaust is on full blast.
(The women sit by a raised grill.)
METELLA: The mountain God must be happy. Breathe deeply. Remember what the sisterhood said.
EVELINA: Oh, it hurts.
METELLA: Oh, my love, is it too hot?
EVELINA: Sometimes in the smoke I see the most terrible things.
METELLA: Like what?
EVELINA: A face. A face of stone.
METELLA: It'll make sense one day. Sister Spurrina promised. The veil will be parted and you'll be a seer.
(Evelina inhales the fumes, and sees a creature of rock with eyes and mouth of fire.)
EVELINA: Who are you?

More than one woman: Metella, Evelina
Talking about: The gods, the Sisterhood, and Evelina’s powers.


(Evelina has recovered, and is laughing as Donna puts on a purple robe and shawl.)
DONNA: You're not supposed to laugh. Thanks for that. What do you think? The Goddess Venus.
EVELINA: Oh, that's sacrilege.
DONNA: Nice to see you laugh, though. What do you do in old Pompeii, then, girls your age? You got mates? Do you go hanging about round the shops? TK Maximus?
EVELINA: I am promised to the Sisterhood for the rest of my life.
DONNA: Do you get any choice in that?
EVELINA: It's not my decision. The Sisters chose for me. I have the gift of sight.
DONNA: Then what can you see happening tomorrow?
EVELINA: Is tomorrow special?
DONNA: You tell me. What do you see?
EVELINA: The sun will rise, the sun will set. Nothing special at all.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Evelina
Talking about: Evelina’s life and powers, the Sisterhood.


DONNA: Evelina, I'm sorry, but you've got to hear me out.
SPURRINA: Sisters.
DONNA: Evelina, can you hear me? Listen.
EVELINA: There is only one prophecy.
DONNA: But everything I'm about to say to you is true, I swear. Just listen to me. Tomorrow, that mountain is going to explode. Evelina, please listen. The air is going to fill with ash and rocks, tons and tons of it, and this whole town is going to get buried.
EVELINA: That's not true.
DONNA: I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, but everyone's going to die.
SPURRINA: A new prophecy.
THALINA: Impossible. There is only one.
DONNA: Even if you don't believe me, just tell your family to get out of town. Just for one day. Just for tomorrow. But you've got to get out. You've got to leave Pompeii.
EVELINA: This is false prophecy.
SPURRINA: The noble woman. She spoke of a new prophecy. The fall of Pompeii.
HIGH PRIESTESS [OC]: Pompeii will last forever.
SPURRINA: Then what must we do?
HIGH PRIESTESS [OC]: The false prophet must die. Sacrifice her.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Evelina, various named and unnamed members of the Sisterhood.
Talking about: The forthcoming volcanic explosion, prophecies and prophets.


DONNA: You have got to be kidding me.
(Donna is tied to the altar, and Spurrina is standing over her with a knife.)
SPURRINA: The false prophet will surrender both her blood and her breath.
DONNA: I'll surrender you in a minute. Don't you dare.
SPURRINA: You will be silent.
DONNA: Listen, sister, you might have eyes on the back of your hands, but you'll have eyes in the back of your head by the time I've finished with you. Let me go!
SPURRINA: This prattling voice will cease forever.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Spurrina
Talking about: Spurrina intends to sacrifice Donna. Donna’s not having it.



Written by Keith Temple

DONNA: If people back on Earth knew what was going on here-
SOLANA: Oh, don't be so stupid. Of course they know.
DONNA: They know how you treat the Ood?
SOLANA: They don't ask. Same thing.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Solana
Talking about: The human race’s treatment of the Ood.



Written by Helen Raynor

DONNA: You've been checking out the building. Should've been checking out the workforce.
MARTHA: I can see why he likes you.
DONNA: Mmm hmm.
MARTHA: You are good.
DONNA: Super temp.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Martha Jones
Talking about: Martha pays Donna some compliments. Donna accepts them.
Notes: Mentions the Doctor, but isn’t about him, it’s about Donna. (Right?)


DONNA: Do you think I should warn my mum about the ATMOS in her car?
MARTHA: Better safe than sorry.
DONNA: I'll give her a call.
MARTHA: Donna. Do they know where you are? Your family. I mean, that you're travelling with the Doctor?
DONNA: Not really. Although my granddad sort of waved us off. I didn't have time to explain.
MARTHA: You just left him behind?
DONNA: Yeah.
MARTHA: I didn't tell my family. I kept it all so secret, and it almost destroyed them.
DONNA: In what way?
MARTHA: They ended up imprisoned. They were tortured. My Mum, my Dad, my sister.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Martha Jones
Talking about: Their respective families being in danger.
Notes: Lots of men are mentioned in this conversation, and indeed Martha’s next line is about how she doesn’t believe her family’s torture was the Doctor’s fault, but I think it’s more about Martha and Donna than any of the men.


SYLVIA: Doesn't know what? And who's she, the cat's mother? And where've you been these past few days, lady, after that silly little trick with the car keys? I phoned Veena and she said she hadn't seen hide nor hair.
DONNA: I've just been travelling.
SYLVIA: Oh, hark at her, Michael Palin. Are you staying for tea, because I haven't got anything in. I've been trying to keep your granddad on that macrobiotic diet, but he sneaks off and gets pork pies at the petrol station. Don't deny it, I've seen the wrappers in the car. Oh, I don't miss a trick. Now then, what were you going to tell me? What don't I know?
DONNA: Nothing. Just nothing.
SYLVIA: Good. Right, then you can sit there and cut out those coupons. Every penny helps. This new mortgage doesn't pay for itself. Dad, kettle on.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: Sylvia is rather dismissive of her daughter’s life.
Notes: I think Sylvia addresses a few snippets of this to Wilf. Does it still count?



Written by Helen Raynor

SYLVIA: All those things they said about pollution, and ozone and carbon, they're really happening aren't they?
DONNA: There's people working on it, Mum. They're going to fix it, I promise.
SYLVIA: Oh, like you'd know. You're so clever.
DONNA: Oh, don't start. Please don't.
SYLVIA: I'm sorry. I wish you were here.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: The current state of the Earth. (Sylvia still takes some time out to belittle her daughter.)


MARTHA 2: Don't touch me.
MARTHA: It's not my fault. The Sontarans created you, but you had all my memories.
MARTHA 2: You've got a brother, sister, mother and father.
MARTHA: If you don't help me, they're going to die.
MARTHA 2: You love them.
MARTHA: Yes. Remember that?

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Martha’s clone
Talking about: The real Martha’s love for her family.


MARTHA 2: My heart. It's getting slower.
MARTHA: There's nothing I can do.
MARTHA 2: In your mind, you've got so many plans. There's so much that you want to do.
MARTHA: And I will. Never do tomorrow what you can do today, my mum says, because
MARTHA 2: Because you never know how long you've got. Martha Jones. All that life.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Martha’s clone
Talking about: The real Martha’s life and plans.


MARTHA: How were they?
DONNA: Oh, same old stuff. They're fine. So, you going to come with us? We're not exactly short of space.
MARTHA: Oh, I have missed all this, but, you know. I'm good here, back at home. And I'm better for having been away. Besides, someone needs me. Never mind the universe, I've got a great big world of my own now.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Donna Noble
Talking about: Their respective families and lives.



Written by Stephen Greenhorn

MARTHA: Oh, I love this bit.
DONNA: I thought you wanted to go home.
MARTHA: I know, but all the same, it's that feeling you get.
DONNA: Like you swallowed a hamster?

More than one woman:
Martha Jones, Donna Noble
Talking about: Their feelings!


DONNA: I'm Donna. What's your name?
JENNY: Don't know. It's not been assigned.
DONNA: Well, if you don't know that, what do you know?
JENNY: How to fight.
DONNA: Nothing else?

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Jenny
Talking about: Who Jenny is and what she can do.


JENNY: And what's it like, the travelling?
DONNA: Oh, never a dull moment. It can be terrifying, brilliant and funny, sometimes all at the same time. I've seen some amazing things though. Whole new worlds.
JENNY: Oh, I'd love to see new worlds.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Jenny
Talking about: Travelling through time and space


DONNA: No, no, no, no. But listen, I spent six months working as a temp in Hounslow Library, and I mastered the Dewey Decimal System in two days flat. I'm good with numbers. It's staring us in the face.
JENNY: What is?
DONNA: It's the date. Assuming the first two numbers are some big old space date, then you've got year, month, day. It's the other way round, like it is in America.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Jenny
Talking about: The numbers on the wall.


DONNA: This war started seven days ago. Just a week. A week!
JENNY: They said years.
DONNA: No, they said generations. And if they're all like you, and they're products of those machines-

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Jenny
Talking about: The war.


MARTHA: Donna.
DONNA: Oh, you're filthy. What happened?.
MARTHA: I, er, took the surface route.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Martha Jones
Talking about: What happened to Martha.


DONNA: Are you sure about this?
MARTHA: Yeah, positive. I can't do this anymore. You'll be the same one day.
DONNA: Not me. Never. How could I ever go back to normal life after seeing all this?

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Martha Jones
Talking about: Their current paths in life.



Written by Gareth Roberts

AGATHA: No, no, please, don't. Thank you, Lady Eddison. Honestly, there's no need.
AGATHA: (turning to DONNA) Agatha Christie.
DONNA: What about her?
AGATHA: That's me.
DONNA: No. You're kidding.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Agatha Christie
Talking about: Agatha introduces herself.


DONNA: Next thing you know, you'll be telling me it's like Murder On The Orient Express, and they all did it.
AGATHA: Murder on the Orient Express?
DONNA: Ooo, yeah. One of your best.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Agatha Christie
Talking about: Donna accidentally gives Agatha an idea for a book.


AGATHA: But, I'm merely a writer.
ROBINA: But surely you can crack it. These events, they're exactly like one of your plots.
DONNA: That's what I've been saying. Agatha, that's got to mean something.
AGATHA: But what? I've no answers. None. I'm sorry, all of you. I'm truly sorry, but I've failed. If anyone can help us, then it's the Doctor, not me.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Agatha Christie, Robina Redmond
Talking about: Agatha’s talent as a writer.
Notes: Again, the Doctor is mentioned, but I think it still counts.


DONNA: Do you know what I think? Those books of yours, one day they could turn them into films. They could be talking pictures.
AGATHA: Talking pictures? Pictures that talk? What do you mean?
DONNA: Oh, blimey, I've done it again.
AGATHA: I appreciate you trying to be kind, but you're right. These murders are like my own creations. It's as though someone's mocking me, and I've had enough scorn for one lifetime.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Agatha Christie
Talking about: Agatha’s books.


DONNA: Agatha, people love your books. They really do. They're going to be reading them for years to come.
AGATHA: If only. Try as I might, it's hardly great literature. Now that's beyond me. I'm afraid my books will be forgotten, like ephemera. Hello, what's that? Those flowerbeds were perfectly neat earlier. now some of the stalks are bent over.
(Agatha picks up a small case.)
DONNA: There you go. Who'd ever notice that? You're brilliant.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Agatha Christie
Talking about: After some discussion of men, the conversation goes back to Agatha’s books.


DONNA: Come on, Agatha. What would Miss Marple do? She'd have overheard something vital by now, because the murderer thinks she's just a harmless old lady.
AGATHA: Clever idea. Miss Marple? Who writes those?
DONNA: Er, copyright Donna Noble. Add it to the list.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Agatha Christie
Talking about: Donna accidentally gives Agatha another idea for a book.


AGATHA: This is a crooked house. A house of secrets. To understand the solution, we must examine them all. Starting with you, Miss Redmond.
ROBINA: But I'm innocent, surely?
AGATHA: You've never met these people, and these people have never met you. I think the real Robina Redmond never left London. You're impersonating her.
ROBINA: How silly. What proof do you have?
AGATHA: You said you'd been to the toilet.
DONNA: Oh, I know this. If she was really posh, she'd say loo.
(Agatha picks up the locksmith's case.)
AGATHA: Earlier today, Miss Noble and I found this on the lawn, right beneath your bathroom window. You must have heard that Miss Noble was searching the bedrooms, so you panicked. You ran upstairs and disposed of the evidence.
ROBINA: I've never seen that thing before in my life.
CLEMENCY: What's inside it?
AGATHA: The tools of your trade, Miss Redmond. Or should I say, the Unicorn. You came to this house with one sole intention. To steal the Firestone.
ROBINA: (Cockney) Oh, all right then. It's a fair cop. Yes, I'm the bleeding Unicorn. Ever so nice to meet you, I don't think. I took my chance in the dark and nabbed it. Go on then, you knobs. Arrest me. Sling me in jail.
(She throws the necklace to the Doctor.)
DONNA: So, is she the murderer?
ROBINA: Don't be so thick. I might be a thief, but, well, I ain't no killer.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Agatha Christie, Robina Redmond/The Unicorn, Clemency Eddison
Talking about: Who dun it.



Written by Steven Moffat

RIVER: Pop your helmets, everyone. We've got breathers.
ANITA: How do you know they're not androids?
RIVER: Because I've dated androids. They're rubbish.

More than one woman: River Song, Anita
Talking about: Androids.


EVANGELISTA: Excuse me, can I help?
ANITA: No, we're fine.
EVANGELISTA: I could just you know, hold things. 

More than one woman: Evangelista, Anita
Talking about: Evangelista tries to be useful.


DONNA: Oh, thanks, for er, you know, offering to help with the lights.
EVANGELISTA: They don't want me. They think I'm stupid, because I'm pretty.
DONNA: Course they don't. Nobody thinks that.
EVANGELISTA: No, they're right though. I'm a moron, me. My dad said I have the IQ of plankton, and I was pleased.
DONNA: See, that's funny.
EVANGELISTA: No, no, I really was pleased. Is that funny?
DONNA: No, no.

More than one woman: Evangelista, Donna Noble
Talking about: Evangelista’s awful self-esteem.


RIVER: This is her last moment. No, we can't. A little respect, thank you.
EVANGELISTA: Sorry, where am I? Excuse me?
DONNA: But that's Miss Evangelista.
RIVER: It's a data ghost. She'll be gone in a moment. Miss Evangelista, you're fine. Just relax. We'll be with you presently.
DONNA: What's a data ghost?

More than one woman: Donna Noble, River Song, Evangelista
Talking about: Data ghosts, and how Evangelista has just become one.


EVANGELISTA: Is she there? The nice woman.
RIVER: Yes, she's here. Hang on. Go ahead. She can hear you.
EVANGELISTA: Hello? Are you there?

More than one woman: River Song, Evangelista
Talking about: The nice woman, Donna.


EVANGELISTA: Hello? Is that the nice woman?
DONNA: Yeah. Hello. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm here. You okay?
EVANGELISTA: What I said before, about being stupid. Don't tell the others, they'll only laugh.
DONNA: Course I won't. Course I won't tell them.
EVANGELISTA: Don't tell the others, they'll only laugh.
DONNA: I won't tell them. I said I won't.
EVANGELISTA: Don't tell the others, they'll only laugh.
DONNA: I'm not going to tell them.
(The green light starts blinking.)
EVANGELISTA: Don't tell the others, they'll only laugh.
RIVER: She's looping now. The pattern's degrading.
EVANGELISTA: I can't think. I don't know, I, I, I, I scream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream. Ice cream.
RIVER: Does anybody mind if I?
EVANGELISTA: Ice cream. Ice cream.
(River turns off the comm. unit.)
DONNA: That was, that was horrible. That was the most horrible thing I've ever seen.
RIVER: No. It's just a freak of technology. But whatever did this to her, whatever killed her, I'd like a word with that.

More than one woman: River Song, Evangelista, Donna Noble
Talking about: Evangelista’s last request, the sheer horror of being a data ghost




Written by Steven Moffat

ANITA: Professor?
RIVER: Just a moment.
ANITA: It's important. I have two shadows.
(Oh no.)
RIVER: Okay. Helmets on, everyone. Anita, I'll get yours.
ANITA: It didn't do Proper Dave any good.
RIVER: Just keep it together, okay?
ANITA: Keeping it together. I'm only crying. I'm about to die. It's not an overreaction.

More than one woman: River Song, Anita
Talking about: Anita’s impeding doom.


ELLA: Mummy, I made you!
(Donna's daughter, Ella, has made a plasticine figure.)
DONNA: Oh, that's nice, Ella. Where's the face?
ELLA: I don't know.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Ella
Talking about: Ella’s creepy plasticine figure.

(Donna sits next to the woman.)
DONNA: I got your note last night. The world is wrong. What's that mean?
EVANGELISTA: No, you didn't.
DONNA: I'm sorry, what?
EVANGELISTA: You didn't get my note last night. You got it a few seconds ago. Having decided to come, you suddenly found yourself arriving. That is how time progresses here, in the manner of a dream. You've suspected that before, haven't you, Donna Noble?
DONNA: How do you know me?
EVANGELISTA: We met before, in the library. You were kind to me. I hope now to return that kindness.
DONNA: Your voice. I recognise it.
EVANGELISTA: Yes, you do. I am what is left of Miss Evangelista.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Evangelista
Talking about: The world being wrong, who Evangelista is.


EVANGELISTA: I suggested we meet here because a playground is the easiest place to see it. To see the lie.
DONNA: What lie?
EVANGELISTA: The children. Look at the children.
DONNA: Why do you wear that veil? If I had a face like yours, I wouldn't hide it.
EVANGELISTA: You remember my face, then? The memories are all still there. The library, the Doctor, me. You've just been programmed not to look.
DONNA: Sorry, but you're dead.
EVANGELISTA: In a way, we're all dead here, Donna. We are the dead of the library.
DONNA: Well, what about the children? The children aren't dead. My children aren't dead.
EVANGELISTA: Your children were never alive.
DONNA: Don't you say that. Don't you dare say that about my children!
EVANGELISTA: Look at your children. Look at all of them, really look.
(All the children in the playground are Ella and Joshua, repeated over and over.)
EVANGELISTA: They're not real. Do you see it now? They're all the same. All the children of this world, the same boy and the same girl, over and over again.
DONNA: Stop it. Just stop it. Why are you doing this? Why are you wearing that veil?
(Donna pulls off Evangelista's veil. Her face is distorted, skewed and stretched. Donna and the girl scream.)

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Evangelista
Talking about: The children not being real.

DONNA: What happened to your face?
EVANGELISTA: Transcription errors. Destroyed my face, did wonders for my intellect. I'm a very poor copy of myself.
DONNA [on TV]: Where are we? Why are the children all the same?
EVANGELISTA [on TV]: The same pattern over and over. It saves an awful lot of space.
DONNA [on TV]: Space?
EVANGELISTA [on TV]: Cyberspace.
CAL: No, don't tell! You mustn't tell!

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Evangelista, CAL
Talking about: The poorly saved patterns.


EVANGELISTA: Your physical self is stored in the library as an energy signature. It can be actualised again whenever you or the library requires.
DONNA: The library? If my face ends up on one of those statues-
EVANGELISTA: You remember the statues?
DONNA: Wait, no, just hang on. So this isn't the real me? This isn't my real body? But I've been dieting.
EVANGELISTA: What you see around you, this entire world
EVANGELISTA [on TV]: Is nothing more than virtual reality.
DONNA: So why do you look like that?
EVANGELISTA: I had no choice. You teleported. You're a perfect reproduction. I was just a data ghost caught in the Wi-Fi and automatically uploaded.
DONNA: And it made you clever?
EVANGELISTA: We're only strings of numbers in here. I think a decimal point may have shifted in my IQ. But my face has been the bigger advantage. I have the two qualities you require to see absolute truth. I am brilliant and unloved.
DONNA: If this is all a dream, whose dream is it?
EVANGELISTA: It's hard to see everything in the data core, even for me, but there is a word. Just one word. Cal.
(The girl is crying. She changes channels.)
(Ella has fallen from a swing.)
ELLA: Mummy, my knee!
DONNA: Oh! Oh, look at that knee. Oh, look at that silly old knee!
EVANGELISTA: She's not real. They're fictions. I'm sorry, but now that you understand that, you won't be able to keep a hold. They are sustained only by your belief.
DONNA: You don't know. You don't have children.
EVANGELISTA: Neither do you.
EVANGELISTA [on TV]: Donna, for your own sake, let them go!
CAL: Stop it! You'll spoil everything! I hate you! You're going to ruin everything! Stop it!

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Evangelista, CAL, Ella
Talking about: The virtual world that they’re now stuck in.




Written by Russell T Davies

THE HOSTESS: Complimentary juice pack and complimentary peanuts.
SKY: Just the headphones, please.
THE HOSTESS: There you go.

More than one woman: The Hostess, Sky
Talking about: Complimentary items.


DEE DEE: She couldn't repeat all that.
SKY: She couldn't repeat all that.
VAL: Tell her to stop.
SKY: Tell her to stop.
VAL: She's driving me mad.
SKY: She's driving me mad.
VAL: Just make her stop!
SKY: Just make her stop!
(People start talking over each other, with Sky still repeating their words.)
VAL: Stop her staring at me. Shut her up.
SKY: Stop her staring at me. Shut her up.
HOSTESS: It's got to be a trick.
SKY: It's got to be a trick.
DEE DEE: That's impossible.
SKY: That's impossible.

More than one woman: Dee Dee, Sky, Val, The Hostess
Talking about: What Sky is doing.
Notes: Midnight is so hard to analyse due to, well, the nature of the episode – everyone’s talking and repeating and it’s so scary but SO HARD to work out exactly who’s talking to who. Bah. That being said, I think this bit does technically pass the Bechdel Test.




Written by Russell T Davies

SYLVIA: Jival, he's called. Jival Chowdry? He runs that little photocopy business and he needs a secretary.
DONNA: I've got a job.
SYLVIA: As a temp. This is permanent, it's twenty thousand a year, Donna.
DONNA: HC Clements is in the City. It's nice, it's posh, so stop it.
[Fortune teller's tent]
FORTUNE TELLER: Your life could have gone one way or the other. What made you decide?
DONNA: I just did.
(Our point of view is something small sneaking up behind Donna.)
FORTUNE TELLER: But when was the moment? When did you choose?
(Donna is at a junction, waiting to turn onto the main road.)
SYLVIA: It won't take long. Just turn right. We'll pop in and see Mister Chowdry, so Suzette can introduce you.
DONNA: I'm going left. If you don't like it, get out and walk.
SYLVIA: If you turn right, you'll have a career, not just filling in.
DONNA: You think I'm so useless.
SYLVIA: Oh, I know why you want a job at HC Clements, lady. Because you think you'll meet a man with lots of money and your whole life will change. Well let me tell you, sweetheart. City executives don't need temps, except for practice.
DONNA: Yeah. Well, they haven't met me.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble (with the unnamed Fortune Teller cutting in too)
Talking about: Donna’s choice between two jobs.
Notes: Obviously lots of men are mentioned during this conversation, but only really as character dressing for Donna?


DONNA: Come on, then, get out the way. Get out the way! Here we are. Feed at the trough.
VEENA: Mooky says let's go to the Boardwalk. It's two for the price of one.
DONNA: Christmas Eve? It'll be heaving.
MOOKY: Well, exactly. Get in and grab them.
VEENA: Hey, that's the second round of drinks you've bought. It was my turn.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Veena, Mooky
Talking about: Where to get their drinks.


DONNA: What's wrong? What is it?
ALICE: Sorry?
DONNA: Did someone spill a drink on me?
DONNA: Why do you keep looking at my shoulder? What's wrong?
ALICE: I don't know.
DONNA: Oh, don't tell me you're getting all spooky again. It was bad enough when you saw the ghost of Earl Mountbatten at the boat show. What are you looking at? What is it?
ALICE: It's like, it's like there's something I can't see.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Alice
Talking about: What’s on Donna’s back.


MOOKY: What the hell is that?
VEENA: Ken Livingstone, that's what! Spending our money on decorations! I mean, how much did that cost?
(The Racnoss web ship is sailing across the sky.)
MOOKY: Don't be so stupid. It's flying! It's really flying!
(The people run around the corner to watch it.)
DONNA: That's not a star. That's a web. It's heading east. Middle of the City.
(Energy lances from the web star and everyone starts screaming and running, except Donna and Alice.)
DONNA: Alice! There's a great big web star thing shooting at people, and you're looking at me?
ALICE: There is something on your back.
(Alice runs away. Donna walks forward.)
VEENA: Donna? Donna, where are you going? You'll get yourself killed! Donna!

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Mooky, Veena, Alice
Talking about: The current unusual goings-on.


ROSE: What's your name?
DONNA: Donna. And you?
ROSE: Oh, I was just passing by. I shouldn't even be here. This is wrong. It's wrong. This is so wrong. Sorry, what was it? Donna what?
DONNA: Why do you keep looking at my back?
ROSE: I'm not.
DONNA: Yes, you are. You keep looking behind me. You're doing it now. What is it? What's there? Did someone put something on my back?
(Donna tries to look at her own back, and Rose disappears.)

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Rose Tyler
Talking about: What’s on Donna’s back.


SYLVIA: This stapler says Bea.
DONNA: I can't believe how well you're taking it, me getting sacked. Thought you'd hit the roof.
SYLVIA: I'm just tired, Donna, what with your father and everything. To be honest, I've given up on you.
NEWS 24 [on TV]: This further report just in from Oliver Morgenstern.
MORGENSTERN [on TV]: There was this woman who took control. Said she knew what to do, said she could stop the MRI or something. Sarah Jane, her name was. Sarah Jane Smith.
NEWS 24 [on TV]: Sarah Jane Smith was a freelance investigative journalist, formerly of Metropolitan Magazine.
Her body was recovered from the hospital late this afternoon. Miss Smith had a son called Luke, but early reports that Luke-
DONNA: What's for tea?
SYLVIA: I've got nothing in.
DONNA: I'll get chips. Last of my wages. Fish and chips, yeah?

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: Donna losing her job, what’s for tea
Notes: A conversation interrupted by Morgenstern (Martha’s co-worker) on TV, but I think it still counts.


(Night. Donna is walking slowly when there is a blinding flash in a nearby jennel and Rose runs out.)
DONNA: Blimey! Are you all right? What was that, fireworks or-
ROSE: I don't know. I was just walking along. That's weird.
DONNA: You're the one. Christmas Eve. I met you in town.
ROSE: Donna? Isn't it?
DONNA: What was your name?
ROSE: How're you doing? You're looking good. How's things, what have you been up to?
DONNA: You're doing it again.
ROSE: What?
DONNA: Looking behind me. People keep on doing that, looking at my back.
ROSE: What sort of people?
DONNA: People in the street. Strangers. I just catch them sometimes, staring at me. Like they're looking at something. And then I get home, and I look, and there's nothing there. See? Look, now I'm doing it!
ROSE: What are you doing for Christmas?
DONNA: What am I what?
ROSE: Next Christmas. Any plans?
DONNA: I don't know. That's ages away. Nothing much, I suppose. Why?
ROSE: Just, I think you should get out, you and your family. Don't stay in London. Just leave the city.
DONNA: What for?
ROSE: Nice hotel Christmas break?
DONNA; Can't afford it.
ROSE: Well, no, you got that raffle ticket.
DONNA: How do you know about that?
ROSE: First prize, luxury weekend break. Use it, Donna Noble.
DONNA: Why won't you tell me your name? I think you should leave me alone.
(Donna walks on. There is a flash of light behind her.)

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Rose gets Donna to leave the city for Christmas.

SYLVIA: Have you seen this?
NEWS 24 [on TV]: We will now return to the BBC news studio.
DONNA: Because I thought, nice early breakfast and then we'll go for a walk. People always say that at Christmas. Oh, we all went for a walk. I've always wanted to do that. So, walk first, presents later, yeah?
SYLVIA: Donna, come and see.
SPANISH MAID: Tienes algo en tu espalda.
NEWS 24 [on TV]: Satellite.
DONNA: What?
SYLVIA: Donna, look at the telly.
SPANISH MAID: Tienes algo en tu espalda.
NEWS 24 [on TV]: Replica of the RMS Titanic.
DONNA: What does that mean? I don't know what you're saying.
SYLVIA: Donna, look at the TV!
SPANISH MAID: Tienes algo en tu espalda!
(The claws are visible by Donna's shoulders, but the bathroom mirror reveals nothing. The maid flees. )
SYLVIA: For God's sake, Donna. Don't just stand there, come and look.
NEWS 24 [on TV]: Not sure how this is possible, but this footage is live and genuine. The object is falling on Central London. I repeat, this is not a hoax. A replica of the Titanic is falling out of the sky, and it's heading for Buckingham Palace. We're getting this footage from the Guinevere range of satellites.
DONNA: Is that a film or something?
NEWS 24 [on TV]: The Royal Air Force has declared an emerg-
(The Titanic crashes into Buckingham Palace and the picture is lost. A shockwave rattles the hotel.)
SYLVIA: It's gone dead. All of them.
DONNA: No, but, the Titanic? Well, don't be daft. Is that like a sequel?

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble, an unnamed Spanish maid (and also News 24 on the TV)
Talking about: The Titanic-shaped missile about to hit London.

SYLVIA: That's everyone. Every single person we know. The whole city.
DONNA: Can't be.
SYLVIA: But it is. It's gone. London's gone.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: The terrible thing that’s just happened.

SYLVIA: Mary McGinty. Do you remember her?
DONNA: Who was she?
SYLVIA: Worked in the newsagent on Sunday. Little woman. Black hair.
DONNA: Never really spoke to her.
SYLVIA: She'll be dead. Every day I think of someone else. All dead.
DONNA: Maybe she went away for Christmas.
SYLVIA: Maybe.
DONNA: I'll go out tomorrow. I'll walk into town. There's got to be work. Everyone needs secretaries. Soon as I'm earning, we'll get a proper place. Just you wait, Mum.
SYLVIA: What if it never gets better?
DONNA: Course it will.
SYLVIA: Even the bees are disappearing. You don't see bumble bees anymore.
DONNA: They'll sort us out. The emergency government. They'll do something.
SYLVIA: What if they don't?
DONNA: Then we'll complain.
SYLVIA: Who's going to listen to us? Refugees. We haven't even got a vote. We're just no one, Donna. We don't exist.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: The now-dead people they knew, the horrible situation they’re in.


DONNA: Hello.
(Cut to them sitting on a bench in the park)
ROSE: It's the ATMOS devices. We're lucky, it's not so bad here. Britain hasn't got that much petrol. But all over Europe, China, South Africa, they're getting choked by gas.
DONNA: Can't anyone stop it?
ROSE: Yeah, they're trying right now, this little band of fighters, on board the Sontaran ship. Any second now.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Rose Tyler
Talking about: The ATMOS devices.


ROSE: It's coming, Donna. It's coming from across the stars and nothing can stop it.
DONNA: What is?
ROSE: The darkness.
DONNA: Well, what do you keep telling me for? What am I supposed to do? I'm nothing special. I mean, I'm, I'm not. I'm nothing special. I'm a temp. I'm not even that. I'm nothing.
ROSE: Donna Noble, you're the most important woman in the whole of creation.
DONNA: Oh, don't. Just don't. I'm tired. I'm so tired.
ROSE: I need you to come with me.
DONNA: Yeah. Well, blonde hair might work on the men, but you ain't shifting me, lady.
ROSE: That's more like it.
DONNA: I've got plenty more.
ROSE: Then you'll come with me, only when you want to.
DONNA: You'll have a long wait, then.
ROSE: Not really. Just three weeks. Tell me, does your grandfather still own that telescope?
DONNA: He never lets go of it.
ROSE: Three weeks time. But you've got to be certain. Because when you come with me, Donna, sorry, so sorry, but you're going to die.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Rose Tyler
Talking about: The darkness that’s coming, Donna Noble being so important.


DONNA: I asked about jobs with the army.
(SYLVIA says nothing, barely acknowledges she’s there, just stares into space)
DONNA: They said I wasn't qualified. You were right. You said I should have worked harder at school. I suppose I've always been a disappointment.
SYLVIA: …Yeah.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: Donna being a disappointment.
Notes: Is this technically more than two lines? I hope this one counts, because it’s such a crushing illustration of the relationship between Donna and her mother. And of Sylvia’s character, how in the worst situation of her life she just retreats into herself and will barely acknowledge or spare a moment’s comfort for her own daughter.


ROSE: I've told you, don't salute.
MAGAMBO: Well, if you're not going to tell us your name.
(Rose goes to a control console.)
DONNA: What, you don't know either?
ROSE: I've crossed too many different realities. Trust me, the wrong word in the wrong place can change an entire causal nexus.
MAGAMBO: She talks like that. A lot. And you must be Miss Noble.
DONNA: Donna.
MAGAMBO: Captain Erisa Magambo. Thank you for this.
DONNA: I don't even know what I'm doing.
ROSE: Is it awake?
MAGAMBO: Seems to be quiet today. Ticking over. Like it's waiting.
(It is the TARDIS, hooked up to some equipment by connectors on the outside.)
ROSE: Do you want to see it?
DONNA: What's a police box?
ROSE: They salvaged it from underneath the Thames. Just go inside.
DONNA: What for?
ROSE: Just go in.
(Donna enters the Tardis.)
DONNA [OC]: No way!
(Donna comes back out, checks the outside, then goes back inside, then finally out again.)
ROSE: What do you think?
DONNA: Can I have a coffee?

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Rose Tyler, Captain Erisa Magambo
Talking about: Who Rose is, the TARDIS.


ROSE: We don't know how the Tardis works, but we've managed to scrape off the surface technology, enough to show you the creature.
DONNA: It's a creature?
ROSE: Just stand here.
MAGAMBO: Out of the circle, please.
ROSE: Yes, ma'am.
(Rose leaves Donna in the middle of the mirrors.)
DONNA: Can't you stay with me?
MAGAMBO: Ready. And activate.
(The lights come on.)
ROSE: Open your eyes, Donna.
DONNA: Is it there?
ROSE: Open your eyes. Look at it.
DONNA: I can't.
ROSE: It's part of you, Donna. Look.
(A giant stag horn beetle is hanging on Donna's back like a rucksack.)
ROSE: It's okay, it's okay, it's okay. Calm down, Donna. Donna? Donna! Okay.
DONNA: What is it?
ROSE: We don't know.
DONNA: Oh, thanks.
ROSE: It feeds off time, by changing time. By making someone's life take a different turn, like er, meetings never made, children never born, a life never loved. But with you, it's-
DONNA: But I never did anything important.
ROSE: Yeah, you did. One day that thing made you turn right instead of left.
DONNA: When was that?
ROSE: Oh, you wouldn't remember. It was the most ordinary day in the world. But by turning right, you never met the Doctor, and the whole world just changed around you.
DONNA: Can you get rid of it?
ROSE: No, I can't even touch it. It seems to be in a state of flux.
DONNA: What does that mean?
ROSE: I don't know. It's the sort of thing the Doctor would say.
DONNA: You liar! You told me I was special. But it's not me, it's this thing. I'm just a host!
ROSE: No, there's more than that. The readings are strange. It's, it's like reality's just bending round you.
DONNA: Because of this thing!
ROSE: No, no! We're getting separate readings from you. And they've always been there, since the day you were born.
MAGAMBO: This is not relevant to the mission.
ROSE: I thought it was just the Doctor we needed, but it's the both of you. The Doctor and Donna Noble, together, to stop the stars from going out.
DONNA: Why? What can I do? Turn it off, please.
ROSE: Captain.
MAGAMBO: Power down.
(Rose goes to Donna.)
DONNA: It's still there, though. What can I do to get rid of it?
ROSE: You're going to travel in time.
(Donna is wearing a jacket with lots of wires all over it.)
ROSE: The Tardis has tracked down the moment of intervention. Monday the twenty fifth, one minute past ten in the morning. Your car was on Little Sutton Street leading to the Ealing Road, but you turned right heading towards Griffin's Parade. You need to turn left. That's the most important thing. You've got to go back, turn left. Have you got that, Donna? One minute past ten, make yourself turn left, heading for the Chiswick Highroad.
MAGAMBO: Keep the jacket on at all times. It's insulation against temporal feedback. This will correspond to local time wherever you land.
(A scientist puts a high tech watch on Donna's wrist. Captain Magambo holds out a glass of water.)
MAGAMBO: This is to combat dehydration. 
(Donna is escorted back to the mirrors.)
ROSE: This is where we leave you.
DONNA: I don't want to see that thing on my back.
ROSE: No, the mirrors are just incidental. They bounce chronon energy back into the centre which we control and decide the destination.
DONNA: It's a time machine.
ROSE: It's a time machine.
MAGAMBO: If you could?
(Donna takes her place in the middle.)
MAGAMBO: Powering up.
DONNA: How do you know it's going to work?
ROSE: Hmm? Oh yeah, we, we don't. We're just, we're just guessing.
DONNA: Oh, brilliant.
ROSE: Just remember, when you get to the junction, change the car's direction by one minute past ten.
DONNA: How do I do that?
ROSE: It's up to you.
DONNA: Well, I just have to run up to myself and have a good argument.
ROSE: I'd like to see that!
MAGAMBO: Activate lodestone.
ROSE: Good luck.
DONNA: I'm ready.
ROSE: One minute past ten.
DONNA: Because I understand now. You said I was going to die, but you mean this whole world is going to blink out of existence. But that's not dying, because a better world takes its place. The Doctor's world. And I'm still alive. That's right, isn't it? I don't die. If I change things, I don't die. That's that's right, isn't it?
ROSE: I'm sorry.
DONNA: But I can't die. I've got a future. With the Doctor. You told me!
MAGAMBO: Activate!
(Sparks fly along the power cables running to the Tardis, and Donna dematerialises.)

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Rose Tyler, Captain Erisa Magambo
Talking about: The time beetle, what’s going to happen to Donna.




Written by Russell T Davies

MARTHA: Is anyone hurt? We've lost power. Someone get the lights back on. DaCosta, see to it right now. Suzanne? Are you okay?
(Suzanne is staring out of a window.)
SUZANNE: Martha, look at the sky.
MARTHA: Why, what is it?
SUZANNE: Just look at the sky.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Suzanne
Talking about: The sky


HARRIET: Sarah Jane Smith, 13 Bannerman Road.
HARRIET [on screen]: Are you there?
SARAH: Yeah. Yeah, I'm here. That, that's me.
HARRIET [on screen]: Good. Now
HARRIET: Let's see if we can talk to each other.

More than one woman: Harriet Jones, Sarah Jane Smith
Talking about: Harriet is trying to contact Sarah Jane.


MARTHA [on screen]: I guess Project Indigo was more clever than we thought. One second I was in Manhattan, next second. Maybe Indigo tapped into my mind, because I ended up in the one place that I wanted to be.
(Lying on the floor by the front door.)
MARTHA [memory]: Mum?
FRANCINE: You came home. At the end of the world, you came back to me.
MARTHA: But then all of a sudden, it's like the laptop turned itself on.
HARRIET [on screen]: It did.
HARRIET: That was me.
HARRIET [on screen]: Harriet Jones, former Prime Minister.
MARTHA: Yes, I know who you are.
HARRIET [on screen]: I thought it was about time we all met.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones, Harriet Jones
Talking about: Martha’s escape and Harriet’s contacting of Martha.


HARRIET: Not now, Captain. And Martha Jones
HARRIET [on screen]: Former companion to the Doctor.
ROSE: Oi. So was I.
MARTHA: But how did you find me?
HARRIET [on screen]: This, ladies and gentlemen, this is the Subwave Network.
HARRIET: A sentient piece of software programmed to seek out anyone and everyone who can help to contact the Doctor.
MARTHA: What if the Daleks can hear us?
HARRIET: No, that's the beauty of the Subwave. It's undetectable.
SARAH: And you invented it?
HARRIET [on screen]: I developed it.

More than one woman: Harriet Jones, Rose Tyler, Martha Jones, Sarah Jane Smith
Talking about: The Subwave Network.




Written by Russell T Davies

MARTHA: Now Jack's explained the base code, I know how this teleport works. I think. But you just stay indoors. There's no Daleks on this street. You should be all right. Just er, keep quiet.
FRANCINE: But where are you going?
MARTHA: I'm a member of UNIT, and they gave me the Osterhagen Key. I've got to do my job. I'm sorry.
FRANCINE: Martha. What's an Osterhagen Key? Tell me. What does it do?
MARTHA: Love you.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Francine Jones
Talking about: The Osterhagen key, Martha’s love for her mother.


DONNA: In that parallel world, you said something about me.
ROSE: The dimension cannon could measure timelines, and it's, it's weird, Donna, but they all seemed to converge on you.
DONNA: But why me? I mean, what have I ever done? I'm a temp from Chiswick.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Rose Tyler
Talking about: Donna’s importance.


ANNA [on screen]: This is Osterhagen Station Five. Are you receiving, Station One?
MARTHA: I've got you. That makes three of us, and three is all we need.
(In the People's Republic of China.)
ANNA: My name is Anna Zhou, what's yours?
MARTHA [OC]: Martha Jones.

More than one woman: Martha Jones, Anna Zhou
Talking about: Introductions.









Written by Russell T Davies and Phil Ford

EMILY [on monitor]: Hello, Mum. Susie says hello, don't you, sweetheart? That's it. Give a little wave. Er, oh, what was I going to say? Uncle Soon called in, he says hello. He keeps saying, you must be missing her. I said, she's been gone for over two years now, I'm getting used to it.
EMILY [on monitor]: Oh, no, it's breaking up. It must be the solar flares.
ADELAIDE: Talk faster.
EMILY [on monitor]: About the deposit on the house. Oh, er, I've spoken to the bank -

More than one woman:
Adelaide Brooke, Emily
Talking about: Emily’s life.


MAGGIE: Excuse me, boss. Computer log says we've got an extra person on site. How's that possible?
ADELAIDE: Keep the Biodome closed. And when using open comms, you call me Captain.
MAGGIE: Yeah, but [ADELAIDE hangs up] Who is it? Disconnected.

More than one woman: Adelaide Brooke, Maggie
Talking about: The extra person on site, comms etiquette


ADELAIDE [OC]: Steffi, what's your estimate on shuttle viability?
STEFFI: It's a nine month flight. It'll take us at least three hours to load up everything we need.
ADELAIDE [OC]: You've got twenty minutes.
ADELAIDE: Section B is out.
MIA: But we can get-
ADELAIDE: Listen to me.
ADELAIDE [OC]: Take every pack that you can. We'll go round. We'll make our way out through Section F.
STEFFI [OC]: Transferring oxygenation to Section F. Mia you take the redline stock. And hurry up!

More than one woman: Adelaide Brooke, Mia Bennett, Steffi
Talking about: Shuttle viability.


STEFFI: Captain!
ADELAIDE: We'll open the access panel. We'll get you out through the back. Get out of here. Move it!
STEFFI: Captain, it's inside!
ADELAIDE [OC]: Steffi!
MIA [OC]: Steffi, get back!
ADELAIDE [OC]: We're coming, Steffi. Hold on!

More than one woman: Adelaide Brooke, Mia Bennett, Steffi
Talking about: The other two women try to save Steffi.





Written by Russell T Davies

DONNA: Now then, steady on. It's never too early for margaritas, that's what I say. I forgot to get lemons so I used oranges instead. It's all fruit, same difference.
(Sylvia has opened her present, an item of clothing.)
SYLVIA: Oh, now that's lovely. Look at that. Absolutely beautiful. Love from Donna. Did you keep the receipt?
DONNA: Yes, I did.

More than one woman: Donna Noble, Sylvia Noble
Talking about: Margaritas, presents





Written by Russell T Davies and Steven Moffat

DONNA: Right, come on then, you lot. This photo is just with friends. Come on. And I want all of you in it. Come on. That's it. Well, friends, and Nerys. Oh, I'm only joking. Oh, look at her.
NERYS: You made me wear peach.
DONNA: That's because you are a peach. Furry skin, stone inside, going off.

More than one woman:
Donna Noble, Nerys
Talking about: Nerys’s dress


JACKIE: Maybe, one day. Happy New Year.
ROSE: Happy New Year! Don't stay out all night.
JACKIE: Try and stop me.

More than one woman: Jackie Tyler, Rose Tyler
Talking about: After talking about men, Rose and Jackie say goodbye for the night.







Written by Steven Moffat

MRS ANGELO: I was just about to phone. It's on every channel. Oh, hello, Amy dear. Are you a policewoman now?
AMY: Well, sometimes.
MRS ANGELO: I thought you were a nurse.
AMY: I can be a nurse.
MRS ANGELO: Or actually a nun?
AMY: I dabble.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Mrs Angelo
Talking about: Amy’s costumed capers.




Written by Steven Moffat

MANDY: You're following me. Saw you watching me at the marketplace.
AMY: You dropped this.
MANDY: Yeah, when your friend kept bumping into me.
AMY: What's that?
MANDY: There's a hole. We have to go back.
AMY: A what? A hole?
(Right outside Magpie Electricals is a striped workman's hut with yellow flashing lights and a keep out sign.)
MANDY: Are you stupid? There's a hole in the road. We can't go that way. There's a travel pipe down by the airlocks, if you've got stamps. What are you doing?
AMY: Oh, don't mind me. Never could resist a keep out sign. What's through there? What's so scary about a hole? Something under the road?
(The workman's hut is padlocked.)
MANDY: Nobody knows. We're not supposed to talk about it.
AMY: About what?
MANDY: Below.
AMY: And because you're not supposed to, you don't? Watch and learn.
(Amy picks the lock with a hairpin, watched by a Smiler.)
MANDY: You sound Scottish.
AMY: I am Scottish. What's wrong with that? Scotland's got to be here somewhere.
MANDY: No. They wanted their own ship.
AMY: Hmm. Good for them. Nothing changes.
MANDY: So, how did you get here?

More than one woman:
Amy Pond, Mandy
Talking about: What lurks below, and also Scotland.


AMY: Well, it's kind of weird. A long time ago tomorrow morning. I wonder what I did? Hey, hey. Result! Coming?
(The Frowner turns to a Scowler.)
AMY: Suit yourself.
MANDY: Stop! You mustn't do that!

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Mandy
Talking about: After some discussion of Amy’s marriage and relationship with the Doctor, Amy picks a lock and tries to drag Mandy along on the adventure.


LIZ: You must be Amy. Liz. Liz Ten.
AMY: Hi.
LIZ: Yuck. Lovely hair, Amy. Shame about the sick. You know Mandy, yeah? She's very brave.

More than one woman: Queen Elizabeth 10, Amy Pond
Talking about: Amy’s hair, Mandy.





Written by Steven Moffat

AMY: Where are we? What is this?
RIVER: It's an Aplan Mortarium, sometimes called a Maze of the Dead.
AMY: What's that?

More than one woman: Amy Pond, River Song
Talking about: Where they are.


RIVER: You all right?
AMY: Yeah, I'm fine. So, what's a Maze of the Dead?
RIVER: Oh, it's not as bad as it sounds. It's just a labyrinth with dead people buried in the walls. Okay, that was fairly bad. Right give me your arm. This won't hurt a bit.
(River injects Amy.)
AMY: Ow!
RIVER: There, you see. I lied. It's a viro-stabiliser. Stabilises your metabolism against radiation, drive burn, anything. You're going to need it when we get up to that ship.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, River Song
Talking about: Where they are, Amy’s injection





Written by Steven Moffat

RIVER: Are you okay?
AMY: What happened?
RIVER: We jumped.
AMY: Jumped where?

More than one woman:
Amy Pond, River Song
Talking about: Whether Amy’s ok, where they landed


AMY: What's through there? What do they need?
RIVER: They need to breathe.
(The rear wall of the flight deck slides up to reveal -)
AMY: But that's. That's a-
RIVER: It's an oxygen factory.
AMY: It's a forest.
RIVER: Yeah, it's a forest. It's an oxygen factory.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, River Song
Talking about: The forest.





Written by Toby Whithouse

AMY: Hey. Hello, I'm Amy. What's your name?
ISABELLA: Isabella.
AMY: Listen, we're going to get you out of here, but I need you to tell me what's going on. What is this place? What are they doing?
ISABELLA: They er, they come at night. They gather around my bed, and they take me to a room with this green light and a chair with straps, as if for a surgeon.
AMY: What happens in there?
ISABELLA: I wake up here. And the sunlight burns my skin like candle wax.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Isabella
Talking about: What the vampires are up to.


ROSEANNA: Who are you with? You see, I scarcely believe your idiot brother sent you. What are you doing in my school?
(The chair is brought forward, and a drip bag is hung from a hook above it.)
AMY: Okay, I'll tell you. I'm from Ofsted.
ROSEANNA: (laughs) Put her in the chair.
AMY: No! Take your hands off me!
(The vampires set up bags of blood and fasten Amy into the chair. Francesco holds her head.)
ROSEANNA: Oh, make sport of me, will you? Tease me as if I were your dog? Well, this dog has a bite, girl.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Roseanna
Talking about: Amy snarks her captor.





Written by Chris Chibnall

ALAYA: Why would I tell you?
AMBROSE: Because if you don't, I'm going to have to use this on you.
(Ambrose has kept a taser from her collection of weapons.)
ALAYA: Now you reveal yourselves.

More than one woman: Ambrose, Alaya
Talking about: Ambrose tortures Alaya for information.





Written by Steven Moffat

AMY: Why is it exploding?
RIVER: I assume it's some kind of warning.
AMY: What, something's going to happen to the Tardis?

More than one woman: Amy Pond, River Song
Talking about: The painting depicting the exploding TARDIS.


AMY: How come it's not new?
RIVER: Because it's already old. It's been here thousands of years. No one knows exactly how long.
AMY: Okay, this Pandorica thing. Last time we saw you, you warned us about it, after we climbed out of the Byzantium.
RIVER: Spoilers.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, River Song
Talking about: The Pandorica and its location.





Written by Steven Moffat

CHRISTINE: It's a lovely painting, Amelia. And what are all these?
AMELIA: Stars.
SHARON: Oh, Amelia.
CHRISTINE: Tell you what, shall we go outside?
[Outside the house]
CHRISTINE: What do you see, Amelia?
AMELIA: The moon.
CHRISTINE: And what else?
AMELIA: Just the dark.
CHRISTINE: But no stars. If there were stars up there, we'd be able to see them, wouldn't we? Amelia, look at me. You know this is all just a story, don't you? You know there's no such thing as stars.
(Amy listens to the adult voices downstairs.)
CHRISTINE [OC]: But there's bound to be a bit of her that feels alone. Amelia's a really good person. It's quite common, actually. Throughout history, people have talked about seeing stars in the sky. God knows where it comes from.
SHARON [OC]: I just don't want her growing up and joining one of those Star Cults. I don't trust that Richard Dawkins.

More than one woman:
young Amy Pond, Christine, Sharon
Talking about: The stars that Amy believes in.


AMELIA: Come on, Aunt Sharon.
SHARON: Oh, look at that. That's good, isn't it?
AMELIA: Not that. This way.
SHARON; But we're not looking at anything.
AMELIA: This way!
SHARON: Amelia!
(Amelia stops to look at the exhibit of petrified Daleks, then pushes through the people standing looking at the Pandorica. Someone snatches her Original Cola drink from her. Suddenly there is a post-it note on the Pandorica, saying Stick around, Pond.)
SHARON [OC]: Amelia!
(Amelia runs to hide.)
SHARON: Amelia? Amelia?

More than one woman: young Amy Pond, Sharon
Talking about: The museum exhibits.


AMY: Where am I? Hang on. National Museum, right? I was here once when I was a little-
(She looks at her younger self)
AMY: Yeah, complicated. Let's see (she lifts up Amelia's hair) it's what, 1996?
AMELIA: Who are you?
AMY: It's a long story. Oh. A very long story.

More than one woman: young Amy Pond, Amy Pond
Talking about: Amy meets her younger self.


AMY: What, and Big Bang Two is the bang that brings us back? Is that what you mean?
AMY: What?
RIVER: The Tardis is still burning. It's exploding at every point in history. If you threw the Pandorica into the explosion, right into the heart of the fire.
AMY: Then what?
RIVER: Then let there be light. The light from the Pandorica would explode everywhere at once, just like he said.
AMY: That would work? That would bring everything back?
RIVER: A restoration field powered by an exploding Tardis, happening at every moment in history. Oh, that's brilliant. It might even work.

More than one woman: River Song, Amy Pond
Talking about: The plan to restart the universe.


TABETHA: Morning!
AMY: You're my mum. Oh, my God. You're my mum.
TABETHA: Well, of course I'm your mum. What's the matter with you? And this is your breakfast, which your father made, so feel free to tip it out of the window if it's an atrocity. Downstairs, ten minutes? Big day!

More than one woman: Tabetha Pond, Amy Pond
Talking about: Amy is shocked to see her mother again.







Written by Steven Moffat

ISABELLA: All those Christmas Eves, you never once came to see us.
ABIGAIL: I'm here now.
ISABELLA: Then stay. Stay for tomorrow. Have Christmas dinner with us.
ABIGAIL: I can't.
ISABELLA: Well, then. Tomorrow's Christmas dinner is cancelled, as my sister refuses to attend.
ABIGAIL: Isabella-
ISABELLA: Instead, we'll have it tonight.

More than one woman: Abigail Pettigrew, Isabella
Talking about: Abigail staying for Christmas dinner.





Written by Steven Moffat

AMY: Get back. Stay back from it.
(The woman turns to see the alien.)
JOY: Eek! Oh, my God. What is that? Is that a mask? Is that a Star Trek thing? Ben, is that you?
AMY: Get back from it now!
(Joy turns around.)
JOY: Back from what, honey?
AMY: That.
(Joy turns back again.)
JOY: Eek! Oh, my God! Look at that. Is that a Star Trek mask? Ben, that's got to be you. Hang on, did I just say all that?
AMY: No. Please, you've got to stay back.
JOY: Back, honey? Back from what?
(The lights flicker.)
JOY: Oh, those lights. They never fix them.
AMY: Look behind you.
JOY: Honey, there is nothing. Argh!

More than one woman:
Amy Pond, Joy
Talking about: The alien.


RIVER: I noticed the phone, yes.
AMY: What about it?
RIVER: It was cut off. So how did the child phone from here?
AMY: Okay, but why would anyone want to trap us?

More than one woman: Amy Pond, River Song
Talking about: The child and the phone.





Written by Neil Gaiman

IDRIS: It's starting. What will happen?
AUNTIE: Oh. Er, Nephew will drain your mind and your soul from your body and leave your body empty.
(Idris goes up onto a platform with a bit of alien tech dangling around the place. The Ood holds Idris' head.)
IDRIS: I'm scared.
AUNTIE: I expect so, dear. But soon you'll have a new soul. There'll be a Time Lord coming.

More than one woman: Idris, Auntie
Talking about: Idris’s soul
Notes: Auntie’s mention of ‘a Time Lord coming’ is referring to a Time Lord in general, rather than the Doctor.






Written by Matthew Graham

CLEAVES: Meet the government's worst kept secret. The Flesh. It's fully programmable matter. In fact, it's even learning to replicate itself at the cellular level.
AMY: Right. Brilliant. Lost.
CLEAVES: Okay. Once a reading's been taken, we can manipulate its molecular structure into anything. Replicate a living organism down to the hairs on its chinny chin chin. Even clothes. And everything's identical. Eyes, voice-

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Miranda Cleaves
Talking about: The Flesh.





Written by Matthew Graham

G-JENNIFER: We can reach out. Inspire them to rise up.
G-CLEAVES: Revolution? Look, I just, I just want to be left to live in peace, Jen.
G-JENNIFER: They will melt you. Have you become so human that you've forgotten the truth? Don't you remember all the times you were decommissioned, or should I say executed?
G-CLEAVES: No, we don't remember.
G-JENNIFER: Well, I do. It's us or them.

More than one woman:
Ganger Jennifer, Ganger Cleaves
Talking about: The revolution.


G-CLEAVES: Get on board. Go.
CLEAVES: I'm not leaving.

More than one woman: Miranda Cleaves, Ganger Cleaves
Talking about: Ganger Cleaves saves her ‘real’ self.





Written by Steven Moffat

JENNY: Congratulations, ma'am. However, a matter has arisen in the drawing room. It just appeared. What does it mean?
VASTRA: It means a very old debt is to be repaid.
(It is the TARDIS.)
VASTRA: Pack the cases, Jenny. And we're going to need the swords.

More than one woman:
Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint
Talking about: The matter that has arisen in the dining room.
Notes: Okay, is this technically more than three lines?


LORNA: Sorry. I shouldn't be here. I'm meant to be at the thing. I brought you something. Your child's name in the language of my people. It's a prayer leaf and we believe, if you keep this with you, your child will always come home to you.
(It is what she was sewing earlier.)
AMY: Can I borrow your gun?
AMY: Because I've got a feeling you're going to keep talking.

More than one woman: Lorna Bucket, Amy Pond
Talking about: Amy is not impressed with Lorna’s attempt to help her.


AMY: What's that?
VASTRA: A force field.
LORNA: And those are the doors. Locking.
VASTRA: Apparently we're not leaving.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Madame Vastra, Lorna Bucket
Talking about: The trap they’re in.


AMY: I still can't read it.
RIVER: It's because it's Gallifreyan and doesn't translate. But this will.
(The prayer leaf.)
RIVER: It's your daughter's name in the language of the Forest.
AMY: I know my daughter's name.
RIVER: Except they don't have a word for Pond, because the only water in the forest is the River.

More than one woman: River Song, Amy Pond
Talking about: River’s big reveal.





Written by Steven Moffat

AMELIA: Why are you always in trouble? You're the most in trouble in the whole school, except for boys.
YOUNG MELS: And you.
AMELIA: I count as a boy.

More than one woman: Mels Zucker (/Melody Pond/River Song), young Amy Pond
Talking about: Who’s the most in trouble.
Notes: Obviously mentions ‘boys’, but I think it still counts.


AMY: Hey.
RIVER: Hey. Where am I?
AMY: You're safe now. Apparently, you used all your remaining regenerations in one go. You shouldn't have done that.
RIVER: Mother, I had to try.
AMY: I know.

More than one woman: River Song, Amy Pond
Talking about: Mother chastises daughter.






Written by Mark Gatiss

Night Terrors is a very awkward one, because while the conversation between Amy and Julie does go on for more than three lines, those lines are edited together with Rory and the Doctor talking to other people on the estate.

JULIE: Can I help you?
AMY: Hi. Er, yeah. No, sorry. I was just wondering if you've had any bother around here?
[RORY: Is everything okay?
MRS ROSSITER: The bins. I can't be expected to get down all them stairs. I need new knees. ]

JULIE: Bother? What do you mean?
AMY: Well, I mean-

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Julie
Talking about: Bother on the estate.

I think it’s a pass, albeit a very minor one, since it is an uninterrupted conversation just not one we see as such, but what do you think?





Written by Tom Macrae

OLDER AMY [in glass]: The me version of you. I refuse to help them. I won't let them save myself.
AMY: Why?
OLDER AMY: If you escape, then I was never trapped here. The last thirty six years of my life rewrites, and I cease to exist. That's why old me refused to help then. That's why I'm refusing to help now. And that's why you'll refuse to help when it's your turn. And nothing you can say will change that.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, old Amy Pond
Talking about: The odd nature of their (/her) current predicament.


OLDER AMY: It's not a teleport, it's a time jump.
AMY: They can't shunt within the same timestream.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, old Amy Pond
Talking about: The timestream.





Written by Toby Whithouse

RITA: You shouldn't have done that. What did you see?
AMY: Nothing. Nothing. I don't know. It was weird.
RITA: Come on.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Rita
Talking about: What Amy saw in the room.





Written by Gareth Roberts

KELLY: Better cash up then. Suppose John Joe can just wait for me.
SHONA: No, I'll do it. You head off.
(The lights flicker again.)
KELLY: When's the council going to fix this? Last night my telly went off in the middle of Top Model.
SHONA: John Joe's waiting. I'll do the changing rooms, too.
KELLY: Oh, thanks, Shona.

More than one woman: Kelly, Shona
Talking about: Locking up the shop, the flickering lights
Notes: Does mention a man, but I think it still counts


ALLIE: Can I have your autograph, please?
AMY: Uh, yeah, sure! Uh, what’s your name?
ALLIE: Allie.
AMY: Hi, sweetie. Allie, I like your hairband.
ALLIE: Thank you.
RORY: All right.
AMY: There you go!
ALLIE: Thank you.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Allie
Talking about: Autographs and hairbands.
Notes: Rory has a line, but neither of the women/girls acknowledge it or reply to it.


KOVARAIN: Oh, don't try and remember me. We've been far too thorough with your dear little head.
(Two Silence creep up behind River.)
RIVER: Oh! What are they? What are those things?
KOVARIAN: Your owners.
RIVER: My what?
KOVARIAN: So, they made you a Doctor today, did they? Doctor River Song. How clever you are.

More than one woman: Madame Kovarian, River Song
Talking about: Who owns River.





Written by Steven Moffat

KOVARIAN: Amy, help me.
AMY: You took my baby from me and hurt her. And now she's all grown up and she's fine, but I'll never see my baby again.
KOVARIAN: But you'll still save me, though.

More than one woman: Madame Kovarian, Amy Pond
Talking about: The terrible wrong Kovarian did to Amy. (After this, they start talking about the Doctor.)


RIVER: How are you doing?
AMY: How do you think?
RIVER: Well, I don't know unless you tell me.
AMY: I killed someone. Madame Kovarian, in cold blood.
RIVER: In an aborted time line, in a world that never was.
AMY: Yeah, but I can remember it, so it happened, so I did it. What does that make me now?

More than one woman: River Song, Amy Pond
Talking about: Amy’s killing of Madame Kovarian.









Written by Steven Moffat

MADGE: Children, go downstairs.
LILY: Why? Are we leaving?
MADGE: Yes! No! I don't know. Just, please, go downstairs!
LILY: You don't need to shout.

More than one woman: Madge Arwell, Lily Arwell
Talking about: Madge, stressed out, shouts at her children.


MADGE: What is all this? Is it some kind of cockpit? My husband's a pilot.
BILLIS: It drives the platform.
MADGE: I don't understand! How did I get here?
BILLIS: You tell us, ma'am.
MADGE: I'm looking for my children.

More than one woman: Madge Arwell, Billis
Talking about: Madge is confused about her new surroundings.


BILLIS: We can do a scan for life forms. We can detect people, even though they're far away.
MADGE: Like RDF, Radar.
MADGE: Then please stop patronising me and get on with it.
BILLIS: Yes, ma'am.

More than one woman: Madge Arwell, Billis
Talking about: Scanning for lifeforms, Madge’s knowledge of technology


BILLIS: Okay, picking up life signs about half a mile away.
MADGE: Can we go to them? Can we move this thing?
BILLIS: I'm not trained, ma'am. Those two are.
MADGE: I can't trust them.
BILLIS: I can't drive the platform, ma'am.
MADGE: It looks a little like a plane. My husband flies a plane. He took me up once.
BILLIS: It takes years of training. Scanning for an audio connection. We might be able to hear them.
COMPUTER: Acid rain alert. Five minute warning. Prepare for beam out.
BILLIS: I'm so sorry. You have to find a way out.
COMPUTER: Evacuate.
BILLIS: Acid fall is coming. You won't last two minutes.
COMPUTER: Evacuate.
MADGE: No, no, please wait. No, what am I to do?

More than one woman: Madge Arwell, Billis
Talking about: The life signs, the coming acid rain and the need to leave.

MADGE: What are those?
LILY: Stay away from it. You have to stay back.
MADGE: That's beautiful, isn't it?

More than one woman: Madge Arwell, Lily Arwell
Talking about: The Wooden Queen.





Written by Steven Moffat

CASSANDRA: Sorry, love. Was I interrupting?
AMY: No.
CASSANDRA: Gosh, look at you. You've gone so pale. Come on, take a seat. We'll soon sort that out.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Cassandra
Talking about: Amy’s looks
Notes: Cassandra is at this point a Dalek puppet – I think we can put her in the same category as things like the Wire, monsters in female form.





Written by Chris Chibnall

AMY: Sorry, what was your name again?
NEFERTITI: Lady of the Two Lands, wife of the great King Amenhotep, Queen Nefertiti of Egypt.
RIDDELL: I'll be damned.
AMY: Oh, my god. Queen Nefertiti? I learned all about you at school. You're awesome. Big fan. High five.
(Nefertiti just looks at her.)
AMY: Yeah, bit behind on that. You're really famous.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Nefertiti
Talking about: Amy is awestruck to meet a Queen.
Notes: Riddell mutters to himself in the background of this conversation, but neither of the women pay him any attention, so I think- it counts?


AMY: But where have they gone?
NEFERTITI: Perhaps they found another world, left the ship.
AMY: Why are the dinosaurs still on board, and why is the ship coming back to Earth? It doesn't make sense.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Nefertiti
Talking about: Where the Silurians went.





Written by Chris Chibnall

AMY: I'm so pleased for you two. It's about time you made an honest woman of her.
LAURA: Amy, about bridesmaids. You've missed quite a few things the last year or two.
AMY: I'm so totally there. Whatever you need.

More than one woman: Amy Pond, Laura
Talking about: Amy being bridesmaid at Laura’s wedding.

AMY: Er, what's this one?
KATE: Try the door.
(Amy opens the door and the Birdie Song starts playing.)
KATE: On a loop!

More than one woman:
Amy Pond, Kate Stewart
Talking about: The cube that plays the Birdie Song.





Written by Steven Moffat

CLARA: Alice, how smart you look today.
ALICE: The governess should enter by the back door, unless accompanied by the children.
CLARA: And how are the children? Excited about tomorrow?

More than one woman: Clara Oswin Oswald, Alice
Talking about: The children (plus a quick reminder of Clara’s status)


CLARA: Frannie, this is important. You dream about her. What do you dream?
FRANCESCA: She's cross with me. She says I've been bad, and she's going to come out of the pond and punish me.
CLARA: When?
FRANCESCA: She said she'd come back for Christmas. Tonight.

More than one woman: Clara Oswin Oswald, Francesca
Talking about: The Ice Governess


VASTRA: There are two refreshments in your world the colour of red wine. This is not red wine.
JENNY: Madame Vastra will ask you questions. You will confine yourself to single word responses. One word only, do you understand?
VASTRA: Truth is singular. Lies are words, words, words.

More than one woman: Clara Oswin Oswald, Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint
Talking about: Vastra intimidates Clara before questioning her about the Doctor.


FRANCESCA: Am I going to have the nightmare tonight?
CLARA: Definitely not.
FRANCESCA: How do you know?

More than one woman: Clara Oswin Oswald, Francesca
Talking about: Francesca’s nightmares.
Notes: After this small exchange, the topic becomes The Doctor once more.


CLARA: Frannie, Frannie, imagine her melting.
CLARA: In your head. Melt her.

More than one woman: Clara Oswin Oswald, Francesca
Talking about: The Ice Governess, again





Written by Steven Moffat

CLARA: Angie? Is the internet working? Trying to phone the helpline, they won't answer.
ANGIE: It's working for me.
CLARA: Can I use it when you're finished?
ANGIE: More than one person can use the internet at a time, Clara.
CLARA: You done your homework?
ANGIE: Shut up, you're not my mum.
CLARA: And I'm not trying to be, okay?

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Angie Maitland
Talking about: The internet, Angie and Clara’s relationship


ANGIE: Is it okay if I go and see Nina? You can call her mum.
CLARA: Sure. What's the password for the internet?
ANGIE: R Y C B A R 1 2 3.
CLARA: How am I supposed to remember that?

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Angie Maitland
Talking about: The password for the Internet.





Written by Neil Cross

CLARA: Hello?
(Something bangs and make her jump. Then the girl appears.)
CLARA: Hey. Are you okay? Are you lost?
(The girl runs off. They find each other further on.)
CLARA: Are you all right? What are you doing?
MERRY: Hiding.
CLARA: Oh. Why?
MERRY: You don't know me?
CLARA: Sorry. Actually not.
MERRY: So why did you follow me?
CLARA: To help. You looked lost.
MERRY: I don't believe you.
CLARA: I've got no idea who you might be. I've never been here before. I've never been anywhere like here before. I just saw a little girl who looked like she needed help.
MERRY: Really?
CLARA: Really really.
MERRY: Can you help me?
CLARA: That's why I'm still here.
MERRY: Because I need to hide.
(Black smoke materialises into three possible robots. A voice whispers in the air.)
VOICE: Merry. Where are you, Merry?
CLARA: I know the perfect box.
(Clara hides Merry behind her as people pass by, then they go to the Tardis.)
MERRY: What's this?
CLARA: A space-shippy thing. Timey, spacey.
MERRY: It's teeny.
CLARA: You wait.
(But the doors don't open for her.)
CLARA: Oh, come on.
MERRY: What's wrong?
CLARA: I don't know. I don't think it likes me. Come on, let me in.
(Merry runs around the back of the Tardis.)
CLARA: Hey. Hey, little girl.
MERRY: My name's Merry.
(Clara sits with Merry round the back of the Tardis.)
CLARA: So, what's happening? Is someone trying to hurt you?
MERRY: No. I'm just scared.
CLARA: Of what?
MERRY: Getting it wrong.
CLARA: Okay. Can you pretend like I'm totally a space alien and explain?
MERRY: I'm Merry Gejelh.
CLARA: Really not local. Sorry.
MERRY: The Queen of Years? They chose me when I was a baby, the day the last Queen of Years died.
CLARA: Okay.
MERRY: I'm the vessel of our history. I know every chronicle, every poem, every legend, every song.
CLARA: Every single one? Blimey. I hated history.
MERRY: And now I have to sing a song in front of everyone. A special song. I have to sing it to a god. And I'm really scared.
CLARA: Everyone's scared when they're little. I used to be terrified of getting lost. Used to have nightmares about it. And then I got lost. Blackpool beach, Bank holiday Monday, about ten billion people. I was about six. My worst nightmare come true.
MERRY: What happened?
CLARA: The world ended. My heart broke. And then my mum found me. We had fish and chips, and she drove me home and she tucked me up and she told me a story.
ELLIE [memory]: It doesn't matter where you are, in the jungle or the desert or on the moon. However lost you may feel, you'll never really be lost. Not really. Because I will always be here, and I will always come and find you. Every single time. Every single time.
MERRY: And you were never scared again?
CLARA: Oh, I was scared lots of times, but never of being lost. So, this special song. What are you scared of, exactly?
MERRY: Getting it wrong. Making Grandfather angry.
CLARA: And do you think you'll get it wrong? Because I don't. I don't think you'll get it wrong. I think you, Merry Gejelh, will get it very, very right.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Merry Gejelh, Ellie Oswald in a flashback
Talking about: Who Merry is, Merry’s fears, Clara’s fears.


CLARA: Merry, we need to leave.
MERRY: No. Go away.
CLARA: Not without you.
MERRY: You said I wouldn't get it wrong and then I got it wrong. And now this has happened. Look what happened!
CLARA: You didn't get it wrong.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Merry Gejelh
Talking about: Clara tries to protect and comfort the girl.


CLARA: You know all the stories. You must know if there's another way out.
MERRY: There's a tale. A secret song. The Thief of the Temple and the Nimmer's Door.
CLARA: And the secret songs open the secret door? How does it go? Can you sing it?

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Merry Gejelh
Talking about: The song.





Written by Neil Cross

EMMA: She knows I'm here. I can feel her calling out to me.
CLARA: What's she saying?
EMMA: Help me.

More than one woman:
Clara Oswald, Emma
Talking about: The ghost.


EMMA: What's wrong?
CLARA: I just saw something I wish I hadn't.
EMMA: What did you see?
CLARA: That everything ends.
EMMA: No, not everything. Not love. Not always. 

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Emma
Talking about: Love!


HILA: I knew you were there. I could feel you.
EMMA: I know.
HILA: Have we...?
EMMA: We can't have. You haven't even been born yet.

More than one woman: Hila, Emma
Talking about: The two women instantly have a connection.





Written by Mark Gatiss

GILLYFLOWER: You wish to join us, my dear?
JENNY: If it's all the same with you, ma'am.
GILLYFLOWER: Oh yes, dear. You'll do very nicely.

More than one woman:
Jenny Flint, Mrs Gillyflower
Talking about: Jenny ‘joins’ Mrs Gillyflower.


ABIGAIL: I'm dead nervous, aren't you? They have to be sure, you see. Only the best for Sweetville. I hope me teeth don't let me down. I'm Abigail.
JENNY: Pleased to meet you.
ABIGAIL: You're not local, are you.
JENNY: Nah. Up from London.
ABIGAIL: Different here, I bet.
JENNY: Yeah. Like a bleeding horse market. Do you know anyone who's come to live here? In Sweetville, I mean.
ABIGAIL: I had a pal who come here three month back. She wrote to tell me how perfect it all were. Funny, though. I've not heard a peep from her since.
PILGRIM [OC]: Next, please!
ABIGAIL: Hang on, we're moving.
(Jenny steps aside to a door and gets her roll of lockpicking tools out.)
ABIGAIL: What're you doing?
JENNY: Do me a favour. Cause a distraction.
JENNY: Swoon. Have a funny turn. Fit of the vapours.
ABIGAIL: Are you crackers?
JENNY: Go on. There's a guinea in it for you.

More than one woman: Jenny Flint, Abigail
Talking about: Jenny gets Abigail to cause a distraction.


CLARA: The name, Sweetville.
CLARA: Why not name it after yourself. After all, it's your creation.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Mrs Gillyflower
Talking about: Sweetville’s name.


GILLYFLOWER: Kindly do not claw and slobber at my crinoline. You know I cannot bear to look at sick people.
ADA: Promise me you will not abandon me, Mama. Promise me that.
GILLYFLOWER: Do you not yet understand? There can be no place for people such as you. That only perfection is good enough for myself and Mister Sweet. The bright day is done, child, and you are for the dark.

More than one woman: Ada Gillyflower, Mrs Gillyflower
Talking about: Mrs Gillyflower first emotionally abuses, and then abandons her blind daughter.


ADA: Mama? Is it, is it true?
ADA: It is. It's true. True.
GILLYFLOWER: Ada, listen to me.
ADA: You hag! You perfidious hag! You virago! You harpy! All these years I have helped you, served you, looked after you. Do they count for nothing, nothing at all?
(Ada starts slashing at her mother with her white stick.)
GILLYFLOWER: No, stop. Stop.

More than one woman: Ada Gillyflower, Mrs Gillyflower
Talking about: Ada’s righteous anger at her mother.


GILLYFLOWER: Ada. Are you there?
ADA: I'm here, Mama.
GILLYFLOWER: Forgive me, my child. Forgive me.
ADA: Never.
GILLYFLOWER: That's my girl.

More than one woman: Ada Gillyflower, Mrs Gillyflower
Talking about: Ada cannot forgive her mother (rather rightly so)





Written by Neil Gaiman

BEAUTY: I can't fix this.
FERRIN: It can't be broken. It's a solid state subether ansible class communicator. Just run the diagnostics.
BEAUTY: There's nothing left to diagnose. It's not broken, it's empty. All the components have gone.
FERRIN: Well, you must have replacement parts.
BEAUTY: Not enough to build a new one.

More than one woman: Beauty, Captain Alice Ferrin
Talking about: The solid state subether ansible class communicator, whatever that is.


ANGIE: Hello, I'm bored.
FERRIN: Where's your big sister?
ANGIE: Clara? She's not my sister. She's stupid.

More than one woman: Angie Maitland, Captain Alice Ferrin
Talking about: Clara.


CLARA: What would the Empire do if they were alerted?
FERRIN: I told you, tell me to blow up the planet.
CLARA: After they got us off?

More than one woman: Beauty, Captain Alice Ferrin
Talking about: Blowing up the planet.


FERRIN: Cyberiad class weaponry. I've taken it out of storage.
CLARA: Good. We need to find somewhere defensible. Where?
(The Captain shows her a large advertising overview of Hedgewick's World.)
FERRIN: The beach, the Giant's Cauldron, Natty Longshoe's Comical Castle.
CLARA: Real castle? Drawbridge? Moat?
FERRIN: Yes, but comical.
CLARA: We'll go there.
FERRIN: Ma'am, my platoon can deal with one Cyberman, and there are protocols if we cannot immediately find and destroy it.
CLARA: Blowing up the planet protocols?
FERRIN: Respectfully, ma'am.
CLARA: Somewhere defensible. No blowing up the planet.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Captain Alice Ferrin
Talking about: How to defend against the Cybermen.





Written by Steven Moffat

ANGIE: Was your mum deep on puddings?
CLARA: She was a great woman.
(She picks up an envelope. Neat cursive writing and a wax seal on the flap, and the instructions Open When Alone.)
CLARA: What's this?
ANGIE: Oh, it arrived today. It's for you.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Angie Maitland
Talking about: Clara’s mother, the letter


VASTRA: So glad you could make it.
CLARA: Where am I?
JENNY: Exactly where you were, but sleeping.
VASTRA: Time travel has always been possible in dreams. We are awaiting only one more participant.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint
Talking about: Where Clara is.


RIVER: Madame Vastra.
VASTRA: Professor. Help yourself to some tea.
RIVER: Why, thank you.
(River creates a champagne bottle and flute for herself.)
JENNY: How did you do that?
RIVER: Disgracefully.

More than one woman: River Song, Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint
Talking about: River’s choice of beverage.


JENNY: Ma'am, I'm sorry. I just realise I forgot to lock the doors.
VASTRA: It doesn't matter, Jenny. What misunderstanding? Tell me.
JENNY: No, ma'am, please. I should've locked up before we went into the trance.
VASTRA: Jenny, it doesn't matter!
JENNY: Someone's broken in. Someone's with us. I can hear them.
VASTRA: Jenny, are you all right?
JENNY: Sorry, ma'am. So sorry. So sorry. So sorry. I think I've been murdered.
(Astral Jenny starts to fade away.)
VASTRA: Jenny!
CLARA: What's happened to her?
RIVER: Jenny, can you hear me?

More than one woman: Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint, River Song, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Jenny’s impeding death.


CLARA: But this is what I've already done. You've already seen me do it. I'm the Impossible Girl, and this is why.
RIVER: Whatever you're thinking of doing, don't.
CLARA: If I step in there, what happens?
RIVER: The time winds will tear you into a million pieces. A million versions of you, living and dying all over time and space, like echoes.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, River Song
Talking about: What the time winds will do to Clara.





Written by Steven Moffat

KATE: I'm acting on instructions direct from the throne. Sealed orders from her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth the First.
CLARA: The Queen? The First? Sorry, Elizabeth the First?
KATE: Her credentials are inside.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Kate Stewart
Talking about: Elizabeth the First.


CLARA: Lock and key? Bit basic, isn't it?
KATE: Can't afford electronic security down here. Got to keep the Doctor out. The whole of the Tower is Tardis-proofed. He really wouldn't approve of the collection.
CLARA: But you let me in.
KATE: You have a top level security rating from your last visit.
CLARA: Sorry, my what?
KATE: Apologies. We have to screen all his known associates. We can't have information about the Doctor and the Tardis falling into the wrong hands. The consequences could be disastrous.
CLARA: What is that?
KATE: Time travel. A vortex manipulator bequeathed to the UNIT archive by Captain Jack Harkness on the occasion of his death. Well, one of them. No one can know we have this, not even our allies.
CLARA: Why not?
KATE: Think about it. Americans with the ability to rewrite history? You've seen their movies.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Kate Stewart
Talking about: The secrets of the Tower.
Notes: Does mention men, but the conversation’s not about them.


CLARA: Er, Kate? Should they be here? Why have they followed us?
ZYGON-KATE: Oh, they've probably just finished disposing of the humans a bit early.
CLARA: The humans?
ZYGON-KATE: Dear me. I really do get into character, don't I?
(Kate spits some venom at Clara, then transforms into a Zygon.)

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Zygon Kate Stewart
Talking about: The secrets of the Tower.
Notes: I’m still not sure if Zygons in a female ‘copy’ count? Can someone who knows more about Zygons weigh in?


OSGOOD: Kate? Oh goodness, you're not actually dead. Oh, that's tremendous news. Those creatures, they turn themselves into copies. And they need to keep the original alive, refresh the image so to speak.
KATE: Where, where did they go?
OSGOOD: I don't know. Oh, hang on, yes, I do. The Tower.
KATE: If those creatures have got access to the Black Archive, we may just have lost control of the planet.

More than one woman: Osgood, Kate Stewart
Talking about: The Zygon threat.


ELIZABETH: The Zygons lost their own world. It burnt in the first days of the Time War. A new home is required.
CLARA: So they want this one.
ELIZABETH: Not yet. It's far too primitive. Zygons are used to a certain level of comfort.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Elizabeth I
Talking about: The Zygons.


(The Zygon transforms into Kate, and sits down opposite her at the table.)
KATE: You'll realise there are protocols protecting this place. Osgood?
OSGOOD: In the event of any alien incursion, the contents of this room are deemed so dangerous, it will self-destruct in-
KATE: Five minutes.
(The alarm sounds and the countdown starts.)
KATE: There's a nuclear warhead twenty feet beneath us. Are you sitting comfortably?
ZYGON-KATE: You would destroy London?
KATE: To save the world, yes, I would.
ZYGON-KATE: You're bluffing.
KATE: You really think so?

More than one woman: Osgood, Kate Stewart, Zygon Kate Stewart
Talking about: The impeding destruction of the whole city.


ZYGON-KATE: One word from you would cancel the countdown.
KATE: Quite so.
ZYGON-KATE: It's keyed to your voiceprint.
KATE: And mine alone.
ZYGON-KATE: Cancel the detonation!
KATE: Countermanded.
ZYGON-KATE: Cancel the detonation.
KATE: Countermanded.
ZYGON-KATE: We only have to agree to live.
KATE: Sadly, we can only agree to die.

More than one woman: Kate Stewart, Zygon Kate Stewart
Talking about: Canceling the detonation. Or not.








Written by Steven Moffat

JENNY: Big fella, isn't he?
VASTRA: Dinosaurs were mostly this size. I do believe it's a she.
JENNY: No, they weren't, I've seen fossils.
VASTRA: I was there.

More than one woman: Jenny Flint, Madame Vastra
Talking about: Dinosaurs!


JENNY: Is it choking?
VASTRA: There seems to be something lodged in its throat.
JENNY: How could it time travel?
VASTRA: I don't know. Perhaps it was something it ate.

More than one woman: Jenny Flint, Madame Vastra
Talking about: The mysterious dinosaur.


CLARA: It's just-
JENNY: What?
CLARA: Nothing. If. If Vastra changed, if she was different, if she wasn't the person that you liked?
VASTRA: I don't like her, ma'am. I love her. And as to different? Well, she's a lizard.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Jenny Flint
Talking about: Vastra and Jenny’s relationship.


VASTRA: And then?
CLARA: Why are you wearing your veil?
VASTRA: And then?
CLARA: And then we got swallowed by a big dinosaur. You probably noticed.
JENNY: How did it happen?
CLARA: I don't know. I don't know.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint
Talking about: How Clara ended up where she did.


VASTRA: Jenny and I are married. Yet for appearance's sake, we maintain a pretence, in public, that she is my maid.
JENNY: Doesn't exactly explain why I'm pouring tea in private.
VASTRA: Hush now.
JENNY: Good pretence, isn't it?
VASTRA: I wear a veil to keep from view what many are pleased to call my disfigurement. I do not wear it as a courtesy to such people, but as a judgment on the quality of their hearts.
CLARA: Are you judging me?

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint
Talking about: Vastra’s veil


CLARA: I am not sure who you think you're talking to right now, Madam Vastra, but I have never had the slightest interest in pretty young men. And for the record, if there ever was anybody who could flirt with a mountain range, she's probably standing in front of you right now. Just because my pretty face has turned your head, do not assume that I am so easily distracted.
(Vastra is no longer wearing her veil. Jenny applauds.)
JENNY: Whoo. Whoo. Sorry.
VASTRA: Well, goodness me. The lake is ruffled at last. I often wondered what you'd be like when you lost your temper.
JENNY: Oi. Married.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint
Talking about: Vastra pushes Clara into losing her temper. Jenny is pleased.


VASTRA: Hmm. Spontaneous combustion.
JENNY: Is that like love at first sight?
VASTRA: Hmm. A little. It is the theory that human beings can, with little or no inducement, simply explode.
JENNY: You don't need to flirt with me. We're already married.
VASTRA: It's scientific nonsense, of course.
JENNY: Marriage?
VASTRA: Hush. There have been nine reported incidents of people apparently exploding in the last month.
JENNY: And you think they weren't spontaneous.
VASTRA: I think whoever killed the dinosaur had at least nine previous victims. All of these perished in the same spectacular fashion.
(Vastra turns the easel to reveal newspaper cuttings, a map of London, and lines linking them up.)
JENNY: I thought you were painting me.
VASTRA: I was working.
JENNY: Well, why am I posing then?
VASTRA: Well, you brighten the room tremendously. Chin up a little.
JENNY: Oh, I don't understand why I'm doing this.
VASTRA: Art? Now, why destroy the victims so completely? It's difficult, it draws attention. What advantage is to be gained?
JENNY: Well, tell us, then.
VASTRA: Concealment, perhaps.
JENNY: Concealment?
VASTRA: It's a fanciful theory, but it fits the facts. By destroying the body so completely, you conceal what is missing from it.
JENNY: Missing from the body?
CLARA [OC]: Madame Vastra!
(A happy Clara bursts into the room.)
VASTRA: Clara, excellent. Pop your clothes on that chair there.
CLARA: Look.
(Clara shows Vastra the Times newspaper.)
VASTRA: Advertisements, yes. So many. It's a distressing modern trend.
CLARA: No, look. Look.
(One advert in the personal column says - Impossible Girl. Lunch on the other side?)
JENNY: Ma'am?
VASTRA: The game is afoot. We're going to need a lot of tea.

More than one woman: Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint, Clara Oswald
Talking about: The murders, Vastra’s art.


VASTRA: How many do you estimate, my dear?
JENNY: More than upstairs. About twenty, thirty?
VASTRA: The ones upstairs were mere decoys. These are battle ready. I anticipate a challenge.

More than one woman: Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint
Talking about: The coming fight.


VASTRA: Jenny!
(Sword points are at everyone's throats.)
CLARA: Hold your breath. They're stupid. Everybody hold their breath.
(They do. The droids pause then lower their weapons. Clara picks up the sonic screwdriver and crawls through the droid's legs on her hands and knees.)
VASTRA [OC]: Be brave, my love. I can store oxygen in my lungs. Share with me.
(Vastra and Jenny lock lips. Clara sonics the door.)

More than one woman: Madame Vastra, Jenny Flint, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Vastra shares her oxygen with Jenny (telepathically for some reason).


VASTRA: Please come in.
CLARA: I'm not interrupting?
VASTRA: I should be glad of your company. What can I do for you?
CLARA: Ah, well, that's exactly what I was going to ask you. Seems like I'm stuck here now. Got a vacancy?

More than one woman: Madame Vastra, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Clara asks if she can stay in Vastra’s household.





Written by Steven Moffat and Phil Ford

JOURNEY: These are nanocontrollers. Once we're miniaturised, they take over the molecular compression. When the mission's over, hit the button.
(Journey puts the bracelet on Clara's wrist.)
JOURNEY: Are you sure you understand?
CLARA: Why wouldn't I?
JOURNEY: Because this is a dangerous mission and you look like a school teacher.
CLARA: I am a school teacher. Still didn't catch your name.
JOURNEY: Journey Blue.

More than one woman:
Madame Vastra, Journey Blue
Talking about: Clara’s job.


CLARA: Oh, God.
GRETCHEN: What? What is it?
CLARA: Antibodies?

More than one woman:
Clara Oswald, Gretchen.
Talking about: Antibodies.


JOURNEY: We need to place these charges for maximum effect. I'm going to scan the rest of the architecture for weaknesses.
CLARA: One question.
JOURNEY: No time.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Journey Blue
Talking about: No time for questions!


JOURNEY: This is crazy. There is no way that we can get back up there in time.
GRETCHEN: Yes, there is.
JOURNEY: No, Gretchen. It'll bring the antibodies back down on us.

More than one woman: Journey Blue, Gretchen
Talking about: Gretchen’s about to sacrifice herself.


JOURNEY: So what do we do?
CLARA: Er, a clever thing, quickly. Think, think, think, think, think. Some of the lights are out.
JOURNEY: Yeah, we've got a damaged Dalek. You want to complain to someone?
CLARA: But it's not damaged, look at them.
CLARA: So, the Doctor said this was a memory bank and some of the memories were suppressed. What if. What if the dark spots are hidden memories? What if one of those is the Dalek seeing a star?
JOURNEY: Seriously?
CLARA: Yeah. Well, maybe. It's either that or the bulbs need changing.
JOURNEY: It really could be the bulbs.
CLARA: Got a better idea?
JOURNEY: Really wish I had.
CLARA: Yep, me too. Ah-ha.
(She pulls one of the panels off.)
CLARA: Watch out for antibodies. Let's see if there's an on switch.
(Clara goes behind, into the memory banks.)

More than one woman: Journey Blue, Clara Oswald
Talking about: The situation they’re in, and how to get out of it.


JOURNEY: Are you okay? Clara?
CLARA: Yeah. I think there was some sort of energy charge.
JOURNEY: You got the first lights on.
CLARA: Of course, it's a brain. Brains work with electrical pathways linking up memories. It's working. It's working, we're turning the memories back on.

More than one woman: Journey Blue, Clara Oswald
Talking about: The Dalek’s brain.





Written by Steven Moffat and Stephen Thompson

(Saibra sighs and takes Clara's hand. For a few moments there are two Claras, then she lets go and changes back to her original self.)
SAIBRA: I touch living cells, I can replicate the owner.
CLARA: Your face, when we first saw you-
SAIBRA: I touched the worm.
CLARA: You can replicate their clothes too?
SAIBRA: I wear a hologram shell.

More than one woman: Saibra, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Saibra’s powers.


KARABRAXOS: It's the only way to control my own security. I have a clone in every facility. Get on it right away.
DELPHOX [on monitor]: Yes, of course.
KARABRAXOS: And then hand in your credentials. You're fired, with immediate effect.
DELPHOX [on monitor]: But please, I've been in your service-
KARABRAXOS: Ever since the last one let me down and I was forced to kill it. I can't quite believe that you're putting me through this again.
(Transmission ends.)
KARABRAXOS: My clone. And yet she doesn't even protest. Pale imitation, really. Ha! I should sue.
CLARA: You're killing her? You just said-
KARABRAXOS: Fired? I put all of the used clones into the incinerator. Can't have too many of moi scattered around.

More than one woman: Karabraxos, Miss Delphox, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Karabraxos killing her clones.





Written by Steven Moffat and Gareth Roberts

CLARA: Sorry, Mrs Christopholou, I think er, I think the caretaker wants me too.
MRS CHRISTOPHOLOU: But what about my Angelina?
CLARA: Yeah, she's great, yeah, a really great girl, A plus, ten out of ten, top of the class. Sorry.
(hurries off, then comes back)
CLARA: Although, actually, handwriting could be better.

More than one woman: Mrs Christopholou, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Angelina.
Notes: Since Clara’s first line mentions the caretaker (the Doctor), I’m not 100 percent sure this counts. But, Clara delivers two lines to her? So…maybe.





Written by Peter Harness

CLARA: Come on. Now, Courtney, come here. Don't look. You all right?
COURTNEY: I'm okay.
(The Doctor cuts the corpse down.)
CLARA: Hey. Look. Look at me. Look. It's all right if you're not.
COURTNEY: I'm fine. What did it?

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Courtney Woods
Talking about: Clara tries to comfort Courtney.


COURTNEY: Miss? Come in.
CLARA [OC]: Courtney?
COURTNEY: I'm bored. When are you coming back?
CLARA [OC]: We're on our way. What you doing?
COURTNEY: Putting some pictures on Tumblr.
(She flicks through pictures of the Doctor and Clara in space suits on her phone.)
CLARA: No! Courtney, don't put any photos on Tumblr.
LUNDVIK: My granny used to put things on Tumblr.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Courtney Woods, Lundvik
Talking about: Tumblr!


LUNDVIK: How do we kill it?
CLARA: Why'd you want to kill it?
COURTNEY [on monitor]: It's a little baby.

More than one woman: Lundvik, Clara Oswald, Courtney Woods
Talking about: The monster and whether to kill it.


CLARA: Stop. Right, listen. This is a, this is a life. I mean, this must be the biggest life in the universe.
COURTNEY [on monitor]: It's not even been born.
LUNDVIK: It is killing people. It is destroying the Earth.
CLARA: You cannot blame a baby for kicking.
LUNDVIK: Let me tell you something. You want to know what I took back from being in space? Look at the edge of the Earth. The atmosphere, that is paper thin. That is the only thing that saves us all from death. Everything else, the stars, the blackness. That's all dead. Sadly, that is the only life any of us will ever know.
COURTNEY [on monitor]: There's life here. There's life just next door.
LUNDVIK: Look, when you've grown up a bit, you'll realise that everything doesn't have to be nice. Some things are just bad. Anyway, you ran away. It's none of your business.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Courtney Woods, Lundvik
Talking about: The monster, and space.

CLARA: If we let it live, what would happen if the moon wasn't there?
LUNDVIK: Listen, we haven't got time for this.
CLARA: We're discussing it! What would happen if the moon wasn't there?
COURTNEY: I have a physics book in my bag. There's this thing on gravity?
LUNDVIK: Super. Is there a word search?
CLARA: Okay, there would be no tides. But we'd survive that, right? They've knocked out the satellites. There's no internet, no mobiles. I'd be fine with that.
LUNDVIK: It's not going to just stop being there, because inside the moon, Miss, is a gigantic creature forcing its way out. And when it does, which is going to be pretty damn soon, there are going to be huge chunks of the moon heading right for us, like whatever killed the dinosaurs, only ten thousand times bigger.
CLARA: But the moon isn't make of rock and stone, is it? It's made of eggshell.
LUNDVIK: Oh, God. Okay, okay, fine. If, by some miracle, the shell isn't too thick, or if it disperses, or if it goes into orbit, whatever, there's still going to be a massive thing there, isn't there, that just popped out. And what the hell do you imagine that is?
COURTNEY: Loads of things lay eggs.
LUNDVIK: It's not a chicken.
COURTNEY: I'm not saying it's a chicken. I'm not completely stupid.
LUNDVIK: It's an exoparasite.
LUNDVIK: Like a flea. Or a head louse.
CLARA: I'm going to have to be a lot more certain than that if I'm going to kill a baby.
LUNDVIK: Oh, you want to talk about babies? You've probably got babies down there now. You want to have babies?
CLARA: Well, yeah.
COURTNEY: Mister Pink.
CLARA: Shush!
LUNDVIK: Okay. You imagine you've got children down there on Earth now, right? Grandchildren maybe. You want that thing to get out? Kill them all? You want today to be the day life on Earth stopped because you couldn't make an unfair decision? Listen, I don't want to do this. All my life I've dreamed about coming here. But this is how it has to end.
(Lundvik sets the trigger.)
LUNDVIK: I've given us an hour. There's a cut-out here. If anyone has any bright ideas, or if he comes back, that stops it. But once it's pressed, it stays pressed.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Courtney Woods, Lundvik
Talking about: The three women discuss whether or not to kill the monster.


CLARA: Was that okay?
(Bang! The lights flicker. Clara takes Courtney's hand.)
CLARA: Come on. Let's see.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Courtney Woods
Talking about: The speech Clara just delivered.


LUNDVIK: We can't risk it all just to be nice.
CLARA: Okay.
LUNDVIK: Nine seconds.
COURTNEY: You can't!
LUNDVIK: Sorry, girls. See you on the other side. Two-
(Clara hits the cut-out switch. Detonation aborted.)

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Courtney Woods, Lundvik
Talking about: Clara can’t kill the monster, against all advice.


CLARA: Yeah, you're right. It's none of your business. Come on, Courtney, off you go. Double Geography.
COURTNEY: Can we do it again?
CLARA: Go. Go, go. Chop chop.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Courtney Woods
Talking about: Courtney wants to go round again.





Written by Jamie Mathieson

MAISIE: Mama, there isn't anyone there. Are you feeling okay?
MRS PITT: Don't you dare lie to me, girl. I won't be made a fool of. Stop it. Stop it. Stop him at once. Right now.
MAISIE: Mama, there's no one there. You're worrying me. Do you want one of your pills?

More than one woman: Maisie Pitt, Mrs Pitt
Talking about: The monster only one of them can see.


CLARA: Hello? Are you okay? Hello? Excuse me? Excuse me?
CLARA: Miss Pitt, wasn't it? Are you all right? Do you need some help?
MAISIE: My name's Maisie. I'm not mad.
CLARA: Oh, okay. Er, I didn't say you were, but you've had a bad day. I think anybody could do with a little bit of help after a day like today.
(Maisie addresses the panel next to a heavy door at the end of the baggage car. It is labelled Private Company Property)
MAISIE: Computer, open the door.
GUS: Call me Gus. I'm afraid this door can only be opened by executive order.
(The thumbs down icon makes a sad noise.)
CLARA: Are you okay?
(Maisie cries as she tries pressing buttons on the keypad.)
MAISIE: They won't let me see her body. They should let me see her body, shouldn't they?
CLARA: Er, yeah, I should think so. It's in there, is it? Okay, I have a friend who's really good with locks. Do you want to come with me, see if we can find him?
(Maisie slams the heel of her shoe into the door key pad and shorts it out. The icon changes to a telescope on a tripod, then the thumbs down, then cannot make up its mind. The door opens.)
CLARA: Or you could do that because that works, too.
(Clara follows Maisie into the room and the door closes behind them.)

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Maisie Pitt
Talking about: Maisie wanting to see her grandmother’s body.
Notes: Gus the computer involves itself in this conversation, and the Doctor is mentioned, but the bits that don’t involve them are more than three lines.


MAISIE: Do you know what you're doing?
CLARA: Nope. But I do need to be slightly more skilled than a high-heeled shoe.
MAISIE: Do you ever wish bad things on people?
CLARA: Oh, yeah. All the time. Whoever designed this door, for a start.
MAISIE: She wasn't really my mum. She just made me call her that. She was my gran. Do you know why I wanted to see her body?
CLARA: Because you loved her very much and were missing her?
MAISIE: (chuckles) No. You obviously never met her. No, I just felt really guilty. Like I'd been picturing her dying for years. Like a daydream. Not really meaning it. At least, I don't think I did. But now, it just feels like I made this happen.
(Clara abandons the lock.)
CLARA: Hey, listen. You didn't do anything wrong. Difficult people, they can make you feel all sorts of things. But you didn't do it. You didn't kill her. She just died.
MAISIE: Are you sure about that?

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Maisie Pitt
Talking about: Maisie’s guilt over her grandmother’s death.





Written by Jamie Mathieson

CLARA: Yes, this case has got our attention.
FORREST: Well, you've come to the right place, ma'am. First reported disappearance, a Mister Heath. It's not on the estate, but it's exactly the same MO as the rest.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, PC Forrest
Talking about: The case.
Notes: The victim they’re talking about is a man, but I think it still counts?





Written by Frank Cottrell Boyce

RUBY: Look at this. Why is this one so fat, miss?
CLARA: Because it was alive so long.
RUBY: This ring, though. All the other rings are thin, but this one's fat and red, see?
CLARA: Must have been a good year to be a tree.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Ruby
Talking about: The tree.


RUBY: Miss, in the museum, right, I was reading about reproduction-
CLARA: Oh, Ruby, this really isn't the right moment.
RUBY: And that said that trees have blossom, and then that turns into fruit or seeds or nuts. Right?
CLARA: Right, Ruby.
RUBY: These trees have got blossom and nuts.
CLARA: Oh, yeah. That is strange.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Ruby
Talking about: Ruby spots something about the trees.





Written by Steven Moffat

MISSY: I am Missy.
CLARA: Missy?
MISSY: Mobile Intelligent Systems Interface. I am a multi-function, interactive welcome-droid. Helping you to help me to help you.

More than one woman:
Clara Oswald, Missy
Talking about: Missy fake-introduces herself.
Notes: I’m not sure about this one either, but Missy does deliver most of her last line while looking at Clara.





Written by Steven Moffat

MISSY: (sings) Hey, Missy, you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind. Hey, Missy. Hey. (speaks.) Excuse me. Hi. Can I tell you something really important?
MISSY: (sotto) I have to whisper it. It's, like, so important to everyone on this plane. You'll get in trouble if you don't listen.
OSGOOD: Right. If it was that important, why would you tell us?
MISSY: Well, look at me, I'm bananas. (sotto) Come on. Just a wee bit closer. Just a little closer. (normal) You know, the Doctor will be really impressed if you learn my secret. You can come a bit closer than that. Come on, stop mucking about. Don't be shy. You don't smell half as bad as you think you do.
OSGOOD: There are two armed men directly behind you.
MISSY: (sotto) Yeah, yeah, yeah.
OSGOOD: If you've got something to say, just say it.
MISSY: Ahem.
(Osgood leans in to listen.)
MISSY: (sotto) I'm going to kill you in a minute. I'm not even kidding. You're going to be as dead as a fish on a slab any second now, all floppy and making smells. But don't tell the boys. This is our secret girl plan.
OSGOOD: Why would you bother killing me? I'm not even important.
MISSY: Oh, silly. Why does one pop a balloon? Because you're pretty. You should have a bit more confidence in yourself.
OSGOOD: Okay. Sorry, I've got work to do.
MISSY: All right, fine. You get on. You get that finished. Would a countdown help you focus at all?
OSGOOD: No, that's okay.
MISSY: Ten. Don't be scared yet, cos I'm still in double figures.
OSGOOD: I'm not scared.
MISSY: Nine. Well, no, of course you're not, cos you know you're dying anyway. Eight. Human beings are born dying.Your life spans are hilarious.
OSGOOD: Please be quiet.
MISSY: Seven. You know from the minute you slop out, you're rotting, decaying. The stench of you. Phew. I'm never going to get this place clean. Three.
OSGOOD: Three?
MISSY: I'm accelerating for dramatic effect. Oh! What's that in your pocket?
OSGOOD: There's nothing in my pocket
(Osgood reaches into her lab coat pocket and pulls out a pair of handcuffs.)
MISSY: Oh my giddy aunt. The quiet ones are the worst.
OSGOOD: Well, those aren't mine.
(Missy applies red lipstick.)
MISSY: Then they must be mine.
(In the blink of an eye, she has her arm around Osgood's throat, grabbed her thingy from the desk and vaporised the two soldiers.)
MISSY: Say something nice.
OSGOOD: Missy, the Master, whatever you call yourself, I promise, I'm much more useful to you alive.
MISSY: Oh, yeah, that's true. That's definitely true. That is a good point well made. I'm proud of you, sister. But did I mention bananas! Pop.
(Missy vaporises Osgood.)
MISSY: Ah. Thanks for being yummy.
(She steps on Osgood's spectacles, crushing the lenses. Then she uses her bracelet to make the airplane start swerving.)
MISSY: Whoo-oo!

More than one woman: Missy, Osgood
Talking about: Missy torments Osgood, then kills her.





Written by Steven Moffat

SHONA: I need the toilet!
BELLOWS: No, you don't. We're monitoring your bodily functions.
SHONA [OC]: And how are you monitoring that? Cos that's rude! That is perverted.

More than one woman:
Shona, Bellows
Talking about: Shona’s bodily functions.


ASHLEY [OC]: From now on, everything you think and feel, everything you see, will be available to them.
[Control room]
ASHLEY: Most of it's fine, like traffic noise when you're sleeping, so long as you don't think about them.
ASHLEY [OC]: So long as you don't look at them. So don't think about them -
[Control room]
ASHLEY: Don't look at them.
(Beep and the doors slide open. There are figures on the beds covered in sheets.)
SHONA: I thought there was going to be music.
BELLOWS [OC]: We've got your playlist

[Control room]
BELLOWS: Ready to go.
ASHLEY: Focus on the words of the song, try to remember what comes next.

ASHLEY [OC]: That will work like interference.
BELLOWS [OC]: Here comes your earworm.
(That perennial favourite earworm, Merry Christmas Everybody by Slade, starts playing.)

[Control room]
ASHLEY: Keep your eyes on the floor.
ASHLEY [OC]: Shut them, where possible.
[Control room]
ASHLEY: Focus on the music and move forward through the infirmary.
(Shona closes her eyes, moves to the beat, and sings along.)
BELLOWS: Oh, dear Lord, she's not actually-
ASHLEY: If dancing works, it works.

More than one woman: Ashley, Shona, Bellows
Talking about: THEM! And Shona’s dancing.


ASHLEY: Shona? Shona, what's wrong?
SHONA: We've, we've got ghosts!
ASHLEY [OC]: Ghosts?
SHONA: Yeah, yeah. It's a skeleton man and a girl in a nightie.

More than one woman: Ashley, Shona
Talking about: The ghosts. (Who are actually Clara and the Doctor.)


SHONA: Don't make me think about them!
CLARA: What are they?
(The figures start to sit up slowly.)
SHONA: Look. Just don't ask, yeah? And don't look. Don't make me think about them.

More than one woman: Ashley, Clara Oswald
Talking about: The things on the bed.


SHONA: I work in a shop.
ASHLEY: I'm sorry?
SHONA: I thought I was a scientist. That's rubbish.
BELLOWS: Finally, something that makes sense.
SHONA: You're horrible, you.
ASHLEY: Perfume.
SHONA: What?
ASHLEY: I'm an account manager for perfume. Does this mean we're waking up?

More than one woman: Shona, Ashley, Bellows
Talking about: The women remember their real lives.


SHONA: We might not know each other? Not any of us?
ASHLEY: No, possibly not.
SHONA: Well, you know what we should do? We should swap numbers. We should have a reunion.
ASHLEY: Bellows!
(Bellows has woken up)

More than one woman: Shona, Ashley
Talking about: Shona wants to swap numbers with the others.


SHONA: Well, don't say that. We'll remember, won't we, Ashley? Ashley?
(Ashley wakes up in bed, with her Dream Crab dying beside her. She leaps out of bed with a scream.)
SHONA: Am I next? Is it me now?
CLARA: Shona, you're going home. You're surviving.
SHONA: Do you want to hang out sometime? We can just hang out.
CLARA: Sure.

More than one woman: Shona, Ashley, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Shona wants hang out with Clara sometimes, but she’s not gonna get to.





Written by Steven Moffat

CLARA: How many planes?
JAC: 4,165 aircraft currently airborne.
KATE: That's a lot of passengers.
CLARA: That's a lot of fuel.
KATE: Oh, dear God. Yes, it is.
CLARA: Okay, so, what could you do with 4,000 flying bombs?
JAC: Ah, well, 439 nuclear power stations currently active.
KATE: What else?
CLARA: I dunno. Er, fault lines. Earthquake, a tsunami?
JAC: Running simulations now.
KATE: So this is an attack?
CLARA: What kind of an attack advertises? Why show somebody what you can do? Why not just do it? What's actually happened to the planes? What are the pilots saying?
KATE: We, we can't contact them.
JAC: The planes haven't stopped. They're actually frozen. Like, frozen in time. Pardon my sci-fi, but this is beyond any human technology.

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Kate Stewart, Jac
Talking about: The frozen planes, what they might mean, and who might be responsible for them.


MISSY [on monitor]: Today, I shall be talking to you out of (suddenly 3D) the square window!
KATE: What the hell was that? How did she do that?
JAC: Dunno. Some sort of psychic projection, or something.
KATE: Oh great, thanks.
MISSY [on monitor]: Okay, cutting to the chase. Not dead, back, big surprise, never mind. I'm in a lovely little square in one of your, oh, I don't know, hot countries. There's a light breeze coming from the east, this coffee is a buzz-monster in my brain, and I'm going to need eight snipers.
KATE: Eight what?
MISSY [on monitor]: Three for each heart, and two for my brain stem. You'll have to switch me off fast, before I can regenerate. How fast can you get here? Ooo, I'll need to arrange you a flight corridor.
(Missy licks her finger before pressing buttons on her controller.)
KATE: Why do you need snipers?
MISSY [monitor]: Because it's the only way she'll feel safe enough to talk to me. Shall we say four o'clock?

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald, Kate Stewart, Jac
Talking about: Missy’s message, Missy not being dead, and snipers.


MISSY: It's a confession dial.
CLARA: A what?
MISSY: In your terms, a will.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: The confession dial.


MISSY: Ah, ah! What are you doing?
CLARA: You said- I thought-
MISSY: No, no, no, no, no. It was delivered to me.
MISSY: Well of course it was sent to me. What have you got to do with it?

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: The confession dial and who it was delivered to.


CLARA: Missy, nobody else!
MISSY: Say something nice.
MISSY: I'll kill everyone in this square.
CLARA: Start with me. Then what, hey? You came here for my help.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Killing people.


CLARA: Make me believe you.
CLARA: Release the planes.
MISSY: The planes are keeping me alive. I mean, there's one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight naughty little snipers ready to kill me.
CLARA: Yeah. On my command.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: The planes.


CLARA: Gravity?
MISSY: Oh, yeah. You know what's wrong with the gravity in here?
MISSY: Nothing. It's perfect. But this is a space station, so the gravity should be artificial, all coppery-smelling round the edges, a tiny bit sexy. (American) But this feels real, man. (normal Scottish) Like a planet.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Gravity.


MISSY: You know what this airlock is? I'll tell you. It's pants.
CLARA: What do you mean?
MISSY: I mean that today might be the day.
CLARA: What day?
MISSY: The day I kill you.
CLARA: What are you doing? Are you opening it?
MISSY: Yeah, course.
CLARA: Missy, we'll get sucked out!
MISSY: You and me together, off we go. Let's make jam!

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: The airlock.


MISSY: It's warm, isn't it? (a pause) For deep space, anyway.
CLARA: What are you doing?
MISSY: Treading softly.
(She steps out cautiously onto nothing visible.)
CLARA: What, there's a floor?
MISSY: No. No, there's ground. This is the ground.
(Clara steps out as Missy does a little dance.)
MISSY: We're on a planet. And that is not a space station. That is a building. And the rest of the planet, the whole thing, is invisible.
(Clara dances around.)
CLARA: That's ridiculous.
MISSY: Well, yes, of course it is. I mean, how would you ever find your glasses? Or the little girl's room? And what if you kissed an ugly? Unless, when you're part of the atmosphere, you start syncing with the spectrum.
CLARA: Why would anybody hide a whole planet?
MISSY: That would rather depend on the planet, dear.
(The spacestation is revealed to be just one of many similar shaped buildings on a desert planet.)

MISSY: They've built it again. They've brought it back. No, no. No!
CLARA: What? What is it? Where are we?

CLARA: What's Skaro?
MISSY: The beginning. Where it all started. This is the planet of the Daleks!

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Skaro.
Notes: This is cut between a conversation the Doctor and Davros are having, but it’s still a conversation between two women.





Written by Steven Moffat

MISSY: You all right there, dear?
CLARA: Where are we? How did we ?
MISSY: Shh, now. Mummy's talking.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Clara’s disorientation.


CLARA: But the Daleks
MISSY: Yes, I'm coming to that.
CLARA: Shouldn't we be, um? I don't want to say dead.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: How they survived the Daleks.


CLARA: Why are you sharpening that stick?
MISSY: Well, I've no idea how long we're going to be stuck out here. Might have to go hunting.
CLARA: So why am I tied up?
MISSY: In case there's nothing to hunt.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Missy’s motives.


MISSY: We, on the other hand, have a pointy stick. How do we start?
CLARA: We assume we're going to win.
MISSY: Oh. Pity, really. I was actually quite peckish.
(Missy starts to walk off across the desert.)
CLARA: Can I have a stick too?
MISSY: Make your own stick.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: How they will fight the Daleks and if Clara can have a stick.


CLARA: Daleks have sewers?
MISSY: With one significant difference.
CLARA: Being?
MISSY: They're ever so slightly alive.
CLARA: They're what?
MISSY: How much of a drop would you say that is? Can you see the bottom?
CLARA: Too dark. Er, we could chuck a stone down, or something.
MISSY: Oh yeah, good idea.
(She pushes Clara down the hole.)
(Scream, thud.)
MISSY: Twenty feet.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Dalek sewers.


MISSY: Hello.
(Clara grabs the pointed stick.)
MISSY: Oh, poppet. Do you really think you could?
CLARA: First chance I get.
MISSY: You won't survive down here on your own.
CLARA: You won't survive turning your back.
MISSY: Ooo. How exciting.
(Missy turns her back on Clara. Nothing happens.)
MISSY: God, you're dull.
(She spins round and grabs the stick back.)
MISSY: In future, if you're going to take my stick, do me the courtesy of actually killing me. Team work is all about respect.
CLARA: We're not a team.
MISSY: Of course we are. Every miner needs a canary. Now, hush, look around. Bit of a mess, isn't it?
CLARA: You said it was a sewer.
MISSY: Daleks don't generate much in the way of waste.
CLARA: So what is it all, then?
MISSY: Decaying Daleks. Daleks can't die. Genetically hard-wired to keep on living, whatever happens. Well. But they still age, poor loves. Over time, the body breaks down, rots, liquefies. Interestingly, the Dalek word for sewer is the same as their word for graveyard.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Killing Missy and the contents of Dalek sewers.


CLARA: What is that? A lift?
(A door at the end of the sewer.)
MISSY: What? Never mind the lift. See that thing on the wall?
(A metal circle with a blue dot in the middle, standing proud of the rock.)
CLARA: What about it?
MISSY: Take a look.
CLARA: What is it?
MISSY: Closer.
CLARA: What am I even looking for?
MISSY: Nothing. I'm giving it a good look at you.
DALEK [OC]: Intruder alert! Intruder alert!
(Alarms sound. Missy grabs Clara.)
CLARA: Why the hell did you do that?
MISSY: Ever ring a doorbell and run away?
DALEK [OC]: Humanoid detected in lower level.
(Missy handcuffs Clara to the wall camera unit.)
MISSY: Not this time.
DALEK [OC]: Dalek to Lower Level Thirteen.
CLARA: What the hell did you do that for?
MISSY: We need to trap and kill a Dalek. You're the bait, I'm the hook.
(She removes the cameo brooch from her blouse neck.)
MISSY: Dark star alloy. Goes through armour plating like a knife through people.
CLARA: Missy. Missy. Missy, uncuff me now!
MISSY: It's pretty, though, isn't it? Got it in the olden days on Gallifrey. The Doctor gave it to me when my daughter
(The lift arrives.)
MISSY: Keep it talking. We need to draw it out of the lift.
CLARA: You can't kill a Dalek with a brooch.
(Missy hides near the lift.)
MISSY: Yes, you can. Yes, you can.
DALEK: Humanoid detected. Remain still. Do not move. Scan in progress. Humanoid unauthorised in restricted area.
(It trundles up to Clara.)
DALEK: Sterilisation proceeding.
MISSY: Hey, you! Guess what? I just put a hole in you.
(She pricks the Dalek's 'globes' and steam comes out.)
MISSY: And another and another. And another!
CLARA: What are you doing?
MISSY: Murdering a Dalek. I'm a Time Lady, it's our golf.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Trapping a Dalek.


CLARA: How am I supposed to make it go? Are there pedals?
MISSY: Telepathic control. Open wide.
(Clara opens her mouth wide.)
MISSY: I meant your skull. Never mind
(Beeep! as the electrodes penetrate Clara's skull.)
MISSY: Shh, shh, now, don't worry.
MISSY: There's loads of nano-tech repairing any damage as the feed goes in.
CLARA: What about when it comes out?
MISSY: No idea. Nobody knows. Anyway, to control the unit, you just have to think. Novel idea for you, but let's try it. Move forwards.
CLARA: I don't know how to
(She gasps as the Dalek moves forwards.)
MISSY: You see?
CLARA: Oh! How did I do that?
MISSY: Circle right.
CLARA: I can't
(She circles right.)
MISSY: Circle left. There you go. All right, this won't hurt a bit.
(Missy touches a control and the Dalek casing starts to close up around Clara.)
CLARA: Hang on. No, Missy. No, no, no, no! No, Missy. Missy, no, no, no, please don't! Don't, don't, please!
MISSY: Are you okay?

CLARA: Fine, I think.
CLARA [in the Dalek]: Okay.
CLARA DALEK: Okay. That's a bit weird.
MISSY: Just a bit. Okay. All right. Shh. Say your name.
MISSY: Just just say. Just say it.
CLARA [in the Dalek]: Clara.
MISSY: Say it again.
CLARA [in the Dalek]: Clara Oswald.
CLARA DALEK: Dalek. Dalek.
MISSY: One more time.
CLARA [in the Dalek]: I am Clara Oswald! I'm Clara Oswald!
CLARA DALEK: I am a Dalek! I am a Dalek! I am a Dalek! I am a Dalek!
(As Missy laughs, the gun fires.)
MISSY: Whoa! Just don't get emotional. Emotion fires the gun. Okay?
CLARA [in the Dalek]: I don't understand.
CLARA DALEK: I do not understand.
MISSY: Say I love you. Those exact words. Don't ask me why, just say it.
CLARA [in the Dalek]: I love you.
CLARA DALEK: Exterminate.
(Missy laughs.)
MISSY: Say, you are different from me.
CLARA [in the Dalek]: You are different from me.
CLARA DALEK: Exterminate! Exterminate!
MISSY: Say, "Ex-ter-min-ate!"
CLARA [in the Dalek]: Exterminate.
CLARA DALEK: Exterminate!
(Missy laughs, then dodges about as Clara spins the Dalek, firing its gun.)
CLARA DALEK: Exterminate! Exterminate! Exterminate! Exterminate! Exterminate!
MISSY: Cybermen suppress emotion. Daleks channel it through a gun. That's why they keep yelling exterminate. It's how they reload. So, let's go and kill them. Come on.

More than one woman: Missy, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Hooking Clara up to the Dalek casing and how she can control it.





Written by Toby Whitehouse

CLARA: We have to stay here.
(CASS glares/shakes her head.)
CLARA: I know that look. I do that look!
(CASS stares.)
CLARA: Okay, fine, but we stick together.
(CASS nods.)

More than one woman: Cass, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Staying where they are.
Notes: Cass is Deaf, and communicates via a male interpreter. However, he’s not here for this scene, and she’s communicating via body language, and Clara is responding. Still a conversation, just not entirely a verbal one.





Written by Jamie Mathieson and Steven Moffat

CLARA: Come on! Quick! Pull!
ASHILDR: I’m trying!
CLARA: Quickly!

More than one woman: Clara Oswald, Ashildr
Talking about: Pulling open the doors so they can avoid dying





Written by Catherine Tregenna

ME/ASHILDR: Where’s the rest?
LUCIE: What else would you take from me, Sir?
ME/ASHILDR: You know what I want. Hand over the amulet!

More than one woman: Me/Ashildr, Lucie Fanshawe
Talking about: The Eyes of Hades amulet




Written by Peter Harness

OSGOOD 1: Hello. Do you want to?
OSGOOD 2: No, you can, if you –
BOTH: Shall we do it together?

More than one woman: Osgood, Osgood’s Zygon double (but which is which?! J )
Talking about: Who should go first on the video.


KATE: Get me Colonel Walsh. And I need you to coordinate the Operation Double locations.
JAC: There are twenty million Zygons. And most of the data was with
(Kate is holding a photograph of the two Osgoods.)
JAC: Her.
KATE: Do what you can. Start with any that have intelligence flags from the past six months.
JAC: Walsh coming through.
WALSH [OC]: Walsh. Turmezistan.
KATE: Any new arrivals?
(Walsh is a lady Red Beret.)
WALSH [on screen]: One. The pictures aren't very good.
(Kate puts on her glasses to see.)
KATE: Can you zoom in on the prisoner?
(Osgood is in manacles, being escorted by two Zygons.)
KATE: It's her. (to Jac) Get into her files. We have to assume they've been compromised.
(Jac's tablet screen fills with Truth Or Consequences over and over again.)
JAC: Er, too late. The encryption system's already been hacked. And they've sent through another video.

More than one woman: Kate Stewart, Jac, Walsh
Talking about: Colonel Walsh, Osgood, and issues related to the Zygon invasion.


KATE: This is where the Zygon High Command had their secret base.
BONNIE AS CLARA: A junior school?
(They go inside. Photographs of Jemima and Claudette are on a wall collage.)
KATE: Terms of the settlement, Operation Double, were these. Twenty million Zygons, the entire hatchery, were allowed to be born and to stay on Earth. They were permitted to permanently take up the form of the nearest available human beings.
JAC: In this case, a large percentage of the population of the UK.

More than one woman: Kate Stewart, Jac, Bonnie shapeshifted as Clara
Talking about: Colonel Walsh, Osgood, and issues related to the Zygon invasion.


KATE: It's just the usual kind of nonsense these idiots call themselves.
BONNIE AS CLARA: It's in New Mexico.
JAC: What?
BONNIE AS CLARA: It's a town in New Mexico. Truth or Consequences. Er, they renamed it after a TV show, for a bet or something. It's a Trivial Pursuit question. I used to memorise Trivial Pursuit questions so I could win.
KATE: That's the last place we received signal from Osgood's phone, isn't it? New Mexico.

More than one woman: Kate Stewart, Jac, Bonnie shapeshifted as Clara
Talking about: The Zygon splinter group and the town.


BONNIE AS CLARA: How many troops do you have?
KATE: Not many. Usually on bigger cases we can draft in from the regular army. We can't do that now. The secrecy of the project has to be maintained.
BONNIE AS CLARA: You got any snazzy weapons?
KATE: There was an attempted Zygon invasion before, in the seventies, eighties. One of our staff was a naval surgeon. Worked at Porton Down on the captured Zygons. Developed Zee-67. It's a nerve gas. Unravels their DNA. Basically turns them inside out.
BONNIE AS CLARA: Where do you keep it?
KATE: We don't. It was taken. The formula, the lot.
BONNIE AS CLARA: Who took it?

More than one woman: Kate Stewart, Bonnie shapeshifted as Clara
Talking about: Troops and Z-67.


BONNIE AS CLARA: It's really slow. We can catch them. Come on!
(Jac and Clara stand outside the lift on the ground floor as it creaks and groans.)
BONNIE AS CLARA: It's slower than usual.
JAC: What's wrong with it?
(The lift doors open. It is empty.)
JAC: Is there a cellar, or somewhere else they could have gone?
JAC: Ugh, what is that?
(The front of the control panel pops loose. Bonnie-as-Clara opens it to reveal Zygon style controls.)
JAC: No, don't.
(Bonnie-as-Clara touches the controls. The lights go out and the lift drops, shaking violently. Clara turns on the light on her phone. Then the lift stops and the doors open.
They step out into a huge tunnel. Sandeep is calling out in the distance. Shadowy figures with torches are carrying things in the distance. Clara and Jac press themselves against the wall of the tunnel.)
BONNIE AS CLARA: I think we need to get some reinforcements.
(They tiptoe back to the lift.)

More than one woman: Jac, Bonnie shapeshifted as Clara
Talking about: The lift and the Zygon slime.


WALSH: Confirm strike.
WALSH: Confirm strike! Confirm strike! Confirm strike!
LISA: Strike aborted! Strike aborted!

More than one woman: Walsh, Lisa
Talking about: The strike.
Notes: Lisa isn’t named in the episode, but is named in the credits.


NORLANDER: You one of them?
KATE: I'm a friend. I've come to help.
NORLANDER: Alone? Have you come to help alone?
KATE: What happened here?
NORLANDER: You must have brought backup. Where's your backup? Tell me!
KATE: First, tell me why I need it.

More than one woman: Norlander, Kate Stewart
Talking about: Whether Kate is a Zygon and if she brought backup.


NORLANDER: The Brits came two years ago. We didn't want them. They just They just turned up. No jobs. Nowhere to live. No money. And they were, they were odd. They started getting into fights. Couple of them got killed.
KATE: More than a couple. What happened here?
NORLANDER: After the murders, they started banding together. And then, one day, one of them changed.
KATE: Changed?
NORLANDER: One of them was walking down West Main, and suddenly, it turned into a, a reptile.
(Kate finds a sketch of a Zygon.)
NORLANDER: They just came for us. They turned into monsters and they came for us. And, and we couldn't fight them. You can't tell who's who. They can turn your own family against you.
(Kate calls up a photo on her phone.)
KATE: Have you seen her?
NORLANDER: Yeah, she was here. She was at the motel, asking questions. Before.
(It is Osgood.)
NORLANDER: Everybody's gone.
KATE: Where?

More than one woman: Norlander, Kate Stewart
Talking about: The Zygons and (one of the) Osgood(s).


JAC: It's an odd world nowadays, isn't it?
BONNIE AS CLARA: It's always been an odd world.
JAC: Mmm. I mean, doesn't it feel, sometimes, that things are coming to an end? Everything's just going nuts.
BONNIE AS CLARA: You're middle-aged, that's what it is. No offence. Everybody middle-aged always thinks the world's about to come to an end. Hmm. Never does. It's here. Oh, my God.

More than one woman: Jac, Bonnie shapeshifted as Clara
Talking about: Feeling like it’s the end of the world.


JAC: Oh, my God. These are Zygon pods.
(Lots of large scaley things attached to the roof and walls.)
BONNIE AS CLARA: I think you might be right.
JAC: About what?
BONNIE AS CLARA: The end of the world.

More than one woman: Jac, Bonnie shapeshifted as Clara
Talking about: The Zygon invasion


BONNIE AS CLARA: Okay. It looks like whole buildings full of people have been pinched. In fact, it looks like a whole London full of people have been pinched. But we've got here early, they're still growing. We've have to neutralise these before they hatch. Take your positions.
(Gun bolts slide.)
BONNIE AS CLARA: Do you know what? I'm enjoying this.
JAC: Clara.
JAC: We don't know that's what these are.
BONNIE AS CLARA: Oh, come on. These are eggs, or pods, or whatever. Look.
(She pulls the membrane from one pod 'window'.)
BONNIE AS CLARA: Oh, my God, that's me.
JAC: I think we should wait.
BONNIE AS CLARA: Look, they're here. They're growing duplicates of us. We have to destroy them. I've seen this happen before. It happened to that little boy. They took his parents and then they took him.
JAC: But I don't see how these are duplicates. That's not how Zygons work. They don't grow duplicates, they kidnap the originals. So these, these are the humans. Retreat. Retreat! This is a trap! This is an ambush!
(A large number of Zygons are there. Clara is calm and smiling slightly.)
JAC: No. Oh, no, Miss Oswald, please. Please!
BONNIE AS CLARA: Kill the traitors.

More than one woman: Jac, Bonnie shapeshifted as Clara
Talking about: Destroying the Zygons who are actually the original humans


NORLANDER: There's hundreds more. They killed everybody.
KATE: We have to find out what forms they took, how many of them there were. How did this happen?
NORLANDER: Somebody once caught the briefest of glimpses of a Zygon in its proper form. A child who hadn't learned to preserve its body print, who had been left alone to learn these things for itself. And then word went round these primitives that we were monsters.
NORLANDER: There isn't any backup, is there? I just had to be sure.
(Norlander transforms into a Zygon and reaches for Kate. In the UNIT safe house, Zygon-Clara is making a call.)
BONNIE AS CLARA [OC]: Commander calling Truth or Consequences. What is your status? Repeat, Commander calling Truth or Consequences. What is your status?
(Presumably the Kate who uses Zygon tech to reply is a Zygon, but we cannot be sure.)
KATE: Commander, UNIT neutralised in North America. Truth or Consequences.

More than one woman: Norlander, Kate Stewart
Talking about: The murders, the start of the Zygon panic, neutralising UNIT





Written by Peter Harness

BONNIE [on screen]: Hello.
(Clara grabs the remote and tries to change channels.)
BONNIE [on screen]: Oh, there's no point turning over. There's nothing better on the other side. I could erase your mind.
CLARA: Then why haven't you?
(BONNIE closes her eyes.)
CLARA: Having trouble?
(Clara closes her eyes.)
CLARA: Let's see what I can do.
(BONNIE turns into a Zygon, falls down, then stands back up in human form again.)
CLARA: See, this thing works two ways, you know.
CLARA [OC]: I want those memories!
(Clara sits on the sofa to read her newspaper.)
CLARA: Trouble is, you're asking me for them, which means you can't access them, right?
BONNIE [in tunnel]: I can make you tell me.
CLARA: No, you can't, otherwise you would have done already.
BONNIE [in tunnel]: I can kill you.
CLARA: Go on, then.
BONNIE [in tunnel]: You think you're calling my bluff.
CLARA: I am calling your bluff. You need me alive.
BONNIE [OC]: Only as a source of information.
CLARA: Then you'd better start asking questions.
BONNIE [in tunnel]: You'd better not lie.
CLARA: (laughs) You see, that's the problem. I am a brilliant liar. How are you ever going to know?
BONNIE [on TV]: Oh, Clara. For a moment, I thought you were clever.
(BONNIE puts two fingers to the pulse in her left arm. The heartbeat is heard.)
BONNIE [on TV]: Our hearts are linked. Beat for beat. The one thing you and I can never do is lie to each other.
(Clara checks her own heartbeat.)
BONNIE [in tunnel]: Oh, that scared you, didn't it?

More than one woman: Bonnie, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Clara’s memories, bluffing, and their live link.


BONNIE: Now, listen to me. Here's what we're going to do. I'm going to ask you questions and if you don't tell me the exact and complete truth, I will know and I will kill you. Do you understand me?
BONNIE: I will slaughter you in that pod right now. Am I lying to you?
BONNIE: Good. Then we'll begin. Where is the Osgood box? You will answer me, Clara. Truth or consequences, lie and you die. Where is it?
CLARA: UNIT HQ. Under the Tower of London.
BONNIE: Where specifically?
CLARA: The Black Archive.
BONNIE: Ah, yes. The dark little storage facility for forbidden alien tech, where this all began. Who has access to it?
CLARA: The Osgoods.
BONNIE: Only the Osgoods?

More than one woman: Bonnie, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Telling the truth and the mysteries of the Osgood box.


BONNIE: Who else? Ah. You. You have access?
BONNIE: Is it a key? Or a code? No, a pass. A key code? Give it to me now.
CLARA: I can't.
BONNIE: Interesting. You're not lying.
CLARA: No, I'm not.
BONNIE: But you have access of some kind.
CLARA: Obviously.
BONNIE: Give it to me now.
CLARA: I told you. I can't. You know I'm not lying, I can't give you access.
BONNIE: Okay, how do you get in there? How, physically, do you get in?
CLARA: It's automatic.
BONNIE: But how? Tell me!
CLARA: The door is keyed to my body print.
BONNIE: Ah, yes, your body print. You can't give me access, because I have access already. I'm you.
BONNIE: And what am I going to find? What's in the Osgood box? Clara?
CLARA: The box ends the ceasefire.
BONNIE: So I'm told. How?
CLARA: There's a button inside the box. Press it, it will transmit a signal that will unmask every Zygon on the planet for up to an hour. What's there to smile about?
BONNIE: Ah, mass panic followed by war. Every Zygon on our side at a stroke.
CLARA: Twenty million Zygons against seven billion humans. That's not a war you can win.
BONNIE: Then we will die in the fire, instead of living in chains.
CLARA: Most of your own kind don't want that.
BONNIE: Then it's time we stopped giving them a choice.
CLARA: It's time you asked the most important question.
BONNIE: Which is?
CLARA: I'm waiting.
BONNIE: Why's it called an Osgood box?
CLARA: I'm not telling you.
BONNIE: Good. I've been looking forward to hearing you scream.
CLARA: I'm not telling you, because when you get to the Black Archive, you'll find out for yourself. And when you do, you're going to want to speak to me again. Am I lying to you?
(The heartbeats say no.)
CLARA: See you later.
(She turns the TV off.)

More than one woman: Bonnie, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Clara’s access and the Osgood box.


KATE (pretending to be Norlander): North America reporting back to High Command.
BONNIE: I'm going to the Black Archive. I'll open it up, you will follow.
KATE: Of course.

More than one woman: Kate Stewart, Bonnie
Talking about: Breaking into the Black Archive.


KATE: No, there are plenty more of them. They were the nearest. You are you?
OSGOOD: I'm me.
KATE: But human or Zygon?

More than one woman: Kate Stewart, Osgood
Talking about: Whether Osgood is Human Osgood or Zygon Osgood.


OSGOOD: Ice creams?
OSGOOD 2: Yes, ice creams. Then back to work.
OSGOOD: What's today?
OSGOOD 2: Oh, you know, same old, same old. Defending the Earth.

More than one woman: Osgood, Bonnie-as-Osgood
Talking about: Ice cream and defending the Earth.





Written by Sarah Dollard

ASHILDR/ME: You must be Clara Oswald. You're as beautiful as your photos.
CLARA: We met.
ASHILDR/ME: Yes, I know. It's in my diaries. Oh, don't look like that. I enjoyed our conversations. I've read them many times.
CLARA: Okay, that's slightly odd, but nice. Er, hang on, so this is where you've been.

More than one woman: Ashildr/Me, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Their previous meeting.


CLARA: (to Ashildr/Me) Is there anything you can do?
ASHILDR/ME: I'm sorry. I'm truly sorry, I -
CLARA: Time's short. Yes or no?

More than one woman: Ashildr/Me, Clara Oswald
Talking about: Clara’s impending death.





Written by Steven Moffat

CLARA: Stay back!
TWELFTH GENERAL: I’m sorry, but we have to find a way to extract you—
CLARA: I said, “Stay back!”

More than one woman: The twelfth incarnation of the General, Clara Oswald
Talking about:
Getting Clara out of the Cloisters, but Clara was having none of it


ME/ASHILDR: I don’t think I’ve got the Chameleon Circuit working. The outer shell might be stuck as an American diner.
CLARA: Awesome.
ME/ASHILDR: Still no pulse?
CLARA: Time isn’t healing. I am still frozen.
ME/ASHILDR: You know what that means?
CLARA: It means my death is a fixed event. The universe depends on it happening.
ME/ASHILDR: I’m sorry.
CLARA: Why? Why does everybody think I am so scared? We all face the raven in the end, that is the deal. If I go back to Gallifrey, they can put be back, right? On Trap Street, the moment they took me out?
ME/ASHILDR: Of course.
CLARA: Mind you, seeing as I’m not actually aging, there’s still a tiny bit of wiggle room, isn’t there?
ME/ASHILDR: Wiggle room?
CLARA: Wiggle room, yeah! You know, wiggle room. We could, um, you know, stop off…on the way.
ME/ASHILDR: Where are we going?
CLARA: Gallifrey. Like I said. Gallifrey…the long way ‘round.

More than one woman: Me/Ashildr, Clara Oswald
Talking about:
The broken Chameleon Circuit, Clara’s death, and taking a few detours on their way back to Gallifrey






Written by Steven Moffat

BILL: You okay?
HEATHER: Yeah, I'm fine.
BILL: Sorry, can I ask? What's that in your eye?
HEATHER: It's just a defect in the iris.
BILL: Looks like a star.
HEATHER: Well, it's a defect.
BILL: At least it's a defect that looks like a star.
HEATHER: I'm getting it fixed.
BILL: Okay. Sorry, none of my business, but are you freaking out about something?
HEATHER: Please. You can say no. Would you come with me? Can I show you something?
BILL: God, yes!

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Heather
Talking about: The star in Heather’s eye, Heather’s feelings


BILL: I love this place, don't you?
HEATHER: I hate it.
BILL: Why?
HEATHER: I don't know. I just do. Everywhere I go I just want to leave.
BILL: Can I come too?

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Heather
Talking about: The university, Heather’s feelings


HEATHER: Maybe. There's a puddle over there, but it hasn't rained for a week.
BILL: Yeah, but, well, you know, half the students here are blokes.
HEATHER: Go and look in it.
BILL: You want me to look in a puddle?
HEATHER: Please.
(Bill goes over to the puddle.)
BILL: Okay, I'm looking. What am I looking at?
HEATHER: Your reflection.
BILL: Yep. There it is.
HEATHER: Do you see what's wrong with it?
(Yes, her hair parting is on the wrong side for a reflection.)
BILL: My name's Bill, by the way.
HEATHER: I'm Heather. Can you see what's wrong?
BILL: Nothing. It just looks like me. Oh! What is that? That's me, that's my face, but It's wrong.
(Heather is walking away.)
BILL: Hey!
HEATHER: Sorry. Some other time.
BILL: Promise?

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Heather
Talking about: The puddle and reflections


MOIRA: I thought you'd enjoy choosing something for yourself, as you're always passing judgments.
(Bill's present is two £10 notes, Moira's is a scarf.)
MOIRA: I hope you didn't spend too much on this.
BILL: Nah. This should cover it. What's that?
MOIRA: Oh, I found that at the back of the cupboard with all your old stuff. Just photographs of your mum. I didn't know we had 'em.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Moira
Talking about: Moira’s present, photographs of Bill’s mother


BILL: Hey! Still making eyes at a puddle?
HEATHER: Did you ever work out what was wrong with your reflection?
BILL: Nah.
HEATHER: Come round. I'll show you.
BILL: Promise you won't go?
HEATHER: Promise.
(But when Bill gets around the fencing, Heather is gone.)
BILL: Okay. Yeah, no worries.
(She leaves, not having seen Heather's screaming face in the puddle.)

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Heather
Talking about: The puddle, reflections, and Heather not running off again


BILL: Well, you're calling from his phone. Is there someone staying here in the flat?
MOIRA [OC]: Of course not, no. What are you talking about?
BILL: Er, nothing. Never mind. I'll see you tomorrow.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Moira
Talking about: Whether there’s someone in the flat


BILL: Hello.
BILL: You scared me.
HEATHER: You scared me.
(Bill steps forward and can see the water dribbling from Heather's mouth and running off her hands. In fact, it is pouring off her entire body.)
BILL: You're dead.
HEATHER: You're dead.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Heather
Talking about: Whether Heather is dead
Notes: This is all mimicry, but I think it does count – it’s still communication between them, in a sense.


BILL: You have to let me go.
HEATHER: You have to let me go.
BILL: I will.
HEATHER: I will.
BILL: I really liked you.
HEATHER: I really liked you.
(Heather reaches out to Bill, and Bill raises her hand too.)
(Bill and Heather clasp hands, and Bill is shown endless worlds, their meeting in bar.)
BILL [OC]: I see what you see. It's beautiful.
BILL: Goodbye, Heather.
HEATHER: Goodbye, Bill.


More than one woman: Bill Potts, Heather
Talking about: Releasing Heather from her promise and their mutual attraction
Notes: Inbetween the lines the Doctor and Nardole talk at Bill, but she doesn’t acknowledge them.






Written by Frank Cottrell-Boyce

GOODTHING: Kezzia, where are you?
KEZZIA: Hey, Goodthing. I’m coming back in.
GOODTHING: Kezzia, don’t come in just yet.
KEZZIA: I’ve been out since second sunrise. I’m hungry. (to the Emojibot) Round them up, big fella.
GOODTHING: Kezzia, please don’t come in. We’re having a little tiny Vardy problem.
KEZZIA: Me and my Vardies have just pollinated three miles of wheat.

GOODTHING: You’ve got to keep smiling.
KEZZIA: Got to what?


More than one woman: Goodthing, Kezzia
Talking about: Harvesting, robots, and smiling



GOODTHING: It’s the Vardies.
KEZZIA: God, what’s wrong with you? Is that smile supposed to look real? It’s like you’re standing in a wind tunnel.
GOODTHING: Okay, big smiles now. Brace yourself! Mum is dead.
KEZZIA: Sorry?  
GOODTHING: Smile, smile, smile!
KEZZIA: That’s not even funny.
GOODTHING: No, it’s not a joke. Mum is dead. Mum is dead. And Hopeful, she’s dead too. And her friend Sunshine, she’s dead. And Eliza. And quite a few other people are dead.
KEZZIA: Why are you saying this? You can’t say things like that, grinning like an idiot.
GOODTHING: Smile, really. Try. If you don’t. I shouldn’t have told you. Please smile. Oh, you’re on two tears now.
KEZZIA: Is it hugging me? Who programmed that?
GOODTHING: (to the Emojibot) Please, give her a moment! She’ll be happy in a moment! (to Kezzia) Kezzia!


More than one woman: Goodthing, Kezzia
Talking about: Robots, people who have died, and smiling








Written by Sarah Dollard

BILL: Is this where you live?
KITTY: For now.
BILL: But there’s no one here.
KITTY: Good work! Except you, Dot. I can see your shoes.
DOTTIE: They’re too big, that’s why!
KITTY: They’re all right, Dot. Strange. But all right.

More than one woman: Bill, Kitty, Dottie
Talking about: Where Kitty lives and Dottie’s shoes
Notes: In between these lines the Doctor asks Kitty a question, but she ignores him in order to respond to Dottie. Once she’s done, then she addresses the Doctor.


HARRIET: The ice is melting!
BILL: Quickly, quickly, that’s it. No, not yet. Harriet, run!
HARRIET: But there’s still people…
BILL: Forget them. There’s no time. Kitty? Run! Now!

More than one woman: Harriet, Bill
Talking about: The ice melting and Harriet’s safety
Notes: In between these lines Lord Sutcliffe has a line, but it’s not to any of the female characters in question and isn’t acknowledged in their conversation.


DOTTIE: Harry, look!
KITTY: No pinching anything, you hear me? And no staring like gapeseeds when the lady talks peculiar. It’s rude.
BILL: Get a load of you lot! Cute as! Come in.
KITTY: You going to tell us what we’re here for?
BILL: A very long time, I hope.

More than one woman: Dottie, Kitty, Bill
Talking about: Manners and the children’s future







Written by Mark Bartlett



FELICITY: I just get nervous when there's no reception. Like something bad's going to happen.
SHIREEN: Have to get a landline.
FELICITY: Landline? What is this, Scotland?

More than one woman: Felicity, Shireen
Talking about: Getting a landline.


SHIREEN: Or a massive, freaky spider.
BILL: Probably just a mouse.
SHIREEN: Yeah, we know. We're just messing with her.
FELICITY: Mice? If there's mice, I'm leaving.

More than one woman: Felicity, Shireen, Bill Potts
Talking about: The freaky things in the house.


SHIREEN: Night, then.
BILL: Why didn't you get a room next to me, like we said?
SHIREEN: What? I don't know. Doesn't mean anything.
BILL: I'm not cool enough, is that it?
SHIREEN: No, shut up. These are my mates, too.

More than one woman: Shireen, Bill Potts
Talking about: Their friendship.


BILL: Er, are you okay?
(A hand appears around the screens.)
ELIZA: Oh, I haven't had visitors in such a long time. My name is Eliza.
BILL: I'm Bill. This is Shireen.
(A carved wooden face appears around the screens.)
ELIZA: I'm pleased to meet you.
SHIREEN: Bill, look!
(Then the whole wooden woman emerges. Shireen recoils as a dryad comes out of Eliza's mouth.)
ELIZA: What?
BILL: You've got something just, just there.
(The dryad crawls into Eliza's ear.)
SHIREEN: I'm a celebrity, get me out of here, yeah?
(Shireen turns to leave. A dryad is coming across the floor.)
(Shireen stamps on it.)
SHIREEN: Cockroaches. Had them on my gap year in Morocco. No problem. Let's go.
BILL: Shireen.
(The dryad is crawling around her translucent foot.)
SHIREEN: Oh, no. Oh, no! It's in my foot!
(A swarm starts to cover Shireen from the ground up.)
BILL: Shireen!
(Shireen screams and is gone. Eliza glows briefly.)
BILL: I, I don't understand. She's -

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Shireen, Eliza
Talking about: Who they are and the things attacking them.


BILL: I thought you were gone.
SHIREEN: Are you okay?
BILL: Me? Yeah, I'm fine. What about the others?

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Shireen
Talking about: What just happened to Shireen and their friends.





Written by Steven Moffat



BILL: Loo's through there.
PENNY: Oh, ta! I thought you'd moved out from here?
BILL: Yeah, slightly didn't work out. Second attempt on the way.
(Penny goes into the toilet, Bill into the living room and turns on a light.)
MOIRA: Did I hear voices?

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Penny, Moira
Talking about: Where Bill’s living now.


MOIRA: Did you bring someone home?
BILL: Yeah. I'm a grown-up. I can do that, can't I?
MOIRA: Of course not. I have very strict rules about men.
BILL: Probably not as strict as mine.
(Penny flushes the loo and come out.)
PENNY: Oh, hello. Are you Moira?
MOIRA: Oh, you're a girl!
PENNY: Mmm. I'm Penny.
MOIRA: Oh! Oh, I see! Oh, I'm sorry. Here's me thinking that she dragged some poor, terrified man home.
BILL: Well, phew.
PENNY: Oh, phew.
MOIRA: Right, you two, I'm off to the pub. Don't do anything I wouldn't do.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Penny, Moira
Talking about: Bringing visitors home, and Moira’s complete obliviousness to Bill’s sexuality


BILL: Alone at last.
(The Tardis materialises in another room.)
PENNY: Oh God, what was that?
BILL: The pipes. It's, it's the, the pipes in, in my bedroom. Be warned. Sometimes I shout at them.
PENNY: What?
BILL: Are you okay?
PENNY: Yeah. Sorry, I'm just not quite used to all of this.
BILL: Well, whatever this is, and actually it's not anything yet, it is absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. Okay?
PENNY: Okay.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Penny
Talking about: The noise, the beginning of their relationship.




Written by Peter Harness and Steven Moffat



PENNY: Are you just completely mad?

BILL: Is it working?

PENNY: A little bit.

BILL: Not so mad, then.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Penny
Talking about: They’re having a good flirt.


PENNY: So this computer-simulation-dream thing.
BILL: Yeah?
PENNY: Which, to be clear, I don't believe a word of.
BILL: Fair enough.
PENNY: You said I was in it?
BILL: Yeah.
PENNY: How did it go? The dream version.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Penny
Talking about: The computer simulation/dream.




Written by Toby Whithouse


MISSY: I once built a gun out of leaves. Do you think I couldn't get through a door if I wanted to? I'm here, all right? I'm engaging with the process.
BILL: Okay. Yeah. Yeah, we can, we can get those things for you.
MISSY: C'est super. So, what have you got so far?

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Missy
Talking about: Missy’s demands


BILL: No, it's okay. I want to speak to her.
BILL: So when you defeated the Monks, that's how you did it?
MISSY: Well, at this point, all that was left of the bloodline was a wee girl, and I just pushed her into a volcano.
BILL: It's me. The lynchpin is me.
MISSY: Awkward.
BILL: So you're saying I have to die.
MISSY: No. If you were just to die, everyone's false memories would have to fade, and that could take ages. It's actually better if you keep breathing, if your brain just keeps transmitting, well, nothing. That would blot out the residue false memories.
BILL: What would be left of me?
MISSY: You'd be a husk. Completely and irrevocably brain-dead. You couldn't even get on Celebrity Love Island.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Missy
Talking about: Missy’s actions and Bill’s potential fate





Written by Mark Gatiss


IRAXXA: And you! Female. What do you say?
IRAXXA: We are both surrounded by noisy males. I would value your opinion.
BILL: (walking forward) Yeah. Yeah, yeah, er. They're not lying to you. There's no need for anyone else to die today. The humans saved his life.
IRAXXA: Is this true?

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Iraxxa
Talking about: Being the only two females in the room, the current situation


BILL: Oi, Queenie! Let's talk. Woman to woman. You valued my opinion before.
IRAXXA: Perhaps. But this is war.
BILL: Why? Why does it have to be war?

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Iraxxa
Talking about: Why a war has to start.




Written by Steven Moffat



HAZRAN: Everyone under their beds, now!

ALIT: Again?

HAZRAN: Alit, get under your bed and stay there!

(Outside, the adults shoot at the approaching Cyber-patients. Alit watches from the window while the others hide under their beds as ordered.)

ALIT: It's the scarecrows. New ones.

GAZRON: It's okay. We'll be okay.


More than one woman: Hazran, Alit, Gazron
Talking about: The approaching Cybermen.


HAZRAN: Sorry you have to stay out here. You'd frighten the children.
BILL: Where am I? How did I…? Sorry, I can't remember.
HAZRAN: The Doctor put you to sleep. You needed rest.
BILL: What am I doing in a barn? What's wrong?
HAZRAN: Sorry. It's just…
BILL: Sorry, what?

More than one woman: Hazran, Bill Potts
Talking about: What’s happened to Bill.
Notes: The Doctor is mentioned in this conversation, but only in passing


BILL: Hello?
ALIT: Hello. Everyone's too scared to talk to you. But I'm not.
BILL: Why are they scared?

More than one woman: Alit, Bill Potts
Talking about: What’s happened to Bill.


BILL: Is that it?
(Alit puts down something covered in a rough cloth.)
BILL: I really wouldn't harm you, you know.
ALIT: I know.
(But she still backs away as Bill steps forward and picks it up, then uncovers it and turns it over. It is a mirror, and her reflection reveals that she is really still Cyber-Bill.)
CYBER-BILL: That is not me.
ALIT: I'm sorry.
CYBER-BILL: I am Bill Potts.
ALIT: I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
(She runs away and into the Doctor.)
CYBER-BILL: I am Bill Potts!

More than one woman: Alit, Bill Potts
Talking about: What’s happened to Bill, and whether she would harm her new friend.


BILL: Am I dead?
(Wet Heather kisses her.)
HEATHER: Does that feel dead to you? You're like me now. It's just a different kind of living.
(Water is pouring off Bill's hands.)
BILL: How did you find me?
HEATHER: I left you my tears, remember?
HEATHER: I know when you're crying them. Time to go.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Heather
Talking about: Bill’s new condition, and how Heather found her.


BILL: How can you fly the Tardis?
HEATHER: I'm the Pilot. I can fly anything. Even you.
BILL: So I'm like you now. I'm not human any more.
HEATHER: I can make you human again. It's all just atoms. You can rearrange them any way you like. I can put you back home, you can make chips, and live your life, or you can come with me. It's up to you, Bill, but, before you make up your mind-
(She opens the Tardis door to reveal a bright star shining in space.)
HEATHER: Let me show you around.
BILL: Back in time for tea?
HEATHER: If you want.

More than one woman: Bill Potts, Heather
Talking about: Heather’s abilities and what to do next (plus a bit of flirting)












































RUSSELL T DAVIES ERA (Rose – The End of Time Part 2)

60 episodes – 51 pass the Bechdel Test

85% pass rate

STEVEN MOFFAT ERA (The Eleventh Hour – The Doctor Falls)

83 episodes – 52 pass the Bechdel Test

74% pass rate


By series

Series One – 13 episodes, 10 pass (76%)

Series Two – 14 episodes, 12 pass (85%)

Series Three – 14 episodes, 13 pass (92%)

Series Four – 14 episodes, 13 pass (92%)

2009 Specials – 5 episodes, 3 pass (60%)

Series Five – 13 episodes, 8 pass (61%)

Series Six – 14 episodes, 12 pass (85%)

Series Seven – 15 episodes, 11 pass (73%)

Day of the Doctor passes, Time of the Doctor doesn’t. (If Clara’s grandmother had been named, it would have passed easily.)

Series Eight – 12 episodes, 10 pass (83%)

Series Nine – 14 episodes, 10 pass (71%)

Series Ten – 12 episodes, 9 pass (75%)


By year

2005 (Rose to The Christmas Invasion) – 78% pass rate

2006 (New Earth to The Runaway Bride) – 85% pass rate

2007 (Smith and Jones to Voyage of the Damned) – 85% pass rate

2008 (Partners in Crime to The Next Doctor) – 92% pass rate

2009 (Planet of the Dead to The End of Time part 1) – 66% pass rate

2010 (The End of Time part 2 to A Christmas Carol) – 66% pass rate

2011 (The Impossible Astronaut to The Doctor, The Widow and The Wardrobe) – 85% pass rate

2012 (Asylum of the Daleks to The Snowmen) – 66% pass rate

2013 (The Bells of St John to Time of the Doctor) – 70% pass rate

2014 (Deep Breath to Last Christmas) - 84% pass rate

2015 (The Magician’s Apprentice to The Husbands of River Song) – 75% pass rate

2016 (The Return of Doctor Mysterio) – 0% pass rate

2017 – (The Pilot to The Doctor Falls) – 75% pass rate



By writer (must have contributed more than five episodes to count!)

Steven Moffat – written or co-written 47 episodes, 38 pass (80%)

Russell T Davies – written or co-written 32 episodes, 27 pass (84%)

Mark Gatiss – written or co-written 8 episodes, 5 pass (62%)

Toby Whithouse – written or co-written 7 episodes, 5 pass (71%)

Gareth Roberts – written or co-written 6 episodes, 3 pass (50%)


By character

Analysis of how many times the main female companions pass a Bechdel Test (three lines minimum of dialogue not about a man with another named woman) in the episodes where she is a credited companion or significant cameo:

ROSE features in 32 episodes (including her appearance as Bad Wolf/The Moment): passes a Bechdel Test in 20 of them: 62%

MARTHA features in 19 episodes: passes a Bechdel Test in 16 of them: 84%

DONNA features in 16 episodes: passes a Bechdel Test in 14 of them: 87%

RIVER features in 15 episodes: passes a Bechdel Test in 12 of them: 80%

AMY features in 33 episodes (not counting her appearance in Time of the Doctor as she is only the Doctor’s illusion): passes a Bechdel Test in 19 of them: 57%

CLARA features in 35 episodes (not counting her ‘echoes’, not counting the Doctor’s illusion of her in Heaven Sent, but counting her brief appearance in The Snowmen): passes a Bechdel Test in 25 of them: 71%

BILL features in 12 episodes: passes a Bechdel Test in 8 of them: 66%


The longest continuous conversation between two women (well, a woman and a little girl) is 42 lines between Clara and Merry in The Rings of Akhaten.
The longest continuous conversation between three women is 62 lines between Rose, Donna and Captain Magambo in Turn Left.


There are only four episodes across the whole of post-2005 Who to only have one female speaking role: Cold War, Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS, Listen and Heaven Sent. (The Girl Who Waited is not counted here as young Amy and old Amy are – although I’ll admit the point is arguable - two separate characters.)


Episodes that pass a Bechdel Test between two or more women of colour (only women of colour, no-one else included or cutting in for a minimum of three lines):

15 out of a total 143 episodes (10%)

(Fear Her, Smith and Jones, Gridlock, The Lazarus Experiment, 42, The Sound of Drums, Turn Left, The Stolen Earth, Journey’s End, Smile, Thin Ice, Knock Knock, Extremis, The Pyramid at the End of the World, The Doctor Falls)


Episodes that pass a Bechdel Test between two or more LGBT women (only lesbian, gay, bisexual and/or transgender women, no-one else included or cutting in for a minimum of three lines):

8 out of a total 143 episodes (5%)

(New Earth*, A Good Man Goes To War, The Name of the Doctor, Deep Breath, The Pilot, Extremis, The Pyramid at the End of the World, The Doctor Falls)
* = In New Earth Cassandra passes the Bechdel test by talking, whilst in a different body, to her past self. In a previous episode Cassandra speaks about her past life with the words “when I was a little boy”, therefore making her Doctor Who’s only transgender character to date.)




143 episodes – 113 pass the Bechdel Test

79% pass rate